Weekend wrap up

Good evening on this Sunday night when all slows a bit.
The children sleep and a quiet hour awaits me.
Can you say...awwwww
That was tell just now the child who was welcomed for a play date will be spending the whole day here tomorrow.
She just called to remind me she will be coming to my house in the morning and to say good night.
Now a play date tuned into an all day event where Dove is really trying to get me to let her stay the night tomorrow night. I am still considering it. It leaves a lot of political issues for my Dove will in no way be sleeping over at the child's house no not ever....

Dove attended her birthday yesterday.
This is the kid who was here during October last and I have a broken trust with the adults in her life...
A play date was one thing...now I feel hood winked into a free child care from 7-5:30 p.m.
Not how I intended to play my day out.
I will let it go this one time.
I do not want to do that all week. I have no doubt that this is going to be where it heads too.
Need wisdom and boundaries on that.

I was the only Mother out of 7 to stay!
One mother saw me and said that she was so happy to see me.."I knew if you would be there you would stay and i could feel alright to leave" said she...
"Oh I said sounds like I am getting a reputation" I smiled back at her...
Another Mom said she had to leave to go to work (single with 5 kids) really nice lady. I told her I would help keep an eye on her girl too.
It was at mid party that we were all called into the party room. A half an hour later the little kid comes in crying , she was forgotten by the host mother an I overlooked her as well. The child who was teamed up with her had said nothing to us either I felt just terrible !
The host mom felt bad too.
The childs mother was alright about it. I was a bit surprised. The kids could not exit the place without a matched wrist banded adult.
Yet she was so upset and I think a bit scared too.
I calmed the girl got her pizza and cake. It was said, that the kid should of gone to get help before or came when called...but she was just a kid.
I think folks expect adult responsibilities from kids when they do not have the developmental ability to give it.

It amazed me
this is high $$$$$$ stuff. $350 plus!
For a small party.
The kids had a blast though!

all of the kids were known to me, and they all know me well for I serve in the class helping several of them with vocational issues and by doing Art Masters.

The birthday girl had a $$$$$$$$ french manicure, Dove was impressed by it.
So on the way home I stopped at a drug store and had a little mom and daughter time.
I saw myself taking time for this over the week end at some point.
Dove asked nicely for a set of glue on nails, she wanted to do our nails together.
This was a priceless chance to tie cords.
We each got a $5 set of nails and between the two sets had enough small ones to do hers and mine.

It was so sweet this morning to be with my daughter to do her nails.
These are just a simple glue and press but to her it is an extravagant privilege.
She is so happy and proud of it, we have nice matching hands.
Good thing for me to do too, as I am breaking a run of nail biting over the stress of late.
It was so fun.

47 year old hands
Mother
daughter
11 year old hands

She choose a tube of fragrant lotion and some head bands for her hair.
I had returned the set I chose for myself thinking not to spend on them. At the register the girl said "buy one set get one free, would you like to go get a free item such price or under for free.
I went back and grabbed the ones for myself I had put back.
It felt like a nice hug from my Poppa.

After a fast run to the grocery store to make use of coupons before they expired.
I came home with 44% off on my small haul of goods.

Then it was off to the Grand parents.
MILove had set up to make some cookies with the kids.
They had a nice time with her.

They were cute little ready made rabbits.

We had a wonderful supper she had prepared for us.
She made Cole slaw. I think Dash had never eaten before. :)
They were so excited about getting a cookie.

MILove had made a few more of these beautiful wash clothes.
I sat and sewed two of them together and then hand cocheade a loop on it.
A pot holder!
She uses a small needle and I love the tightly bond work. It is thick and stout.
She had found two that an elder who has long ago passed on , made for her years and years ago.
She passed them down to me.
Dear Emily she had gone blind toward the end of days, but oh what a kind sweet Elder she was.
Full of the Word and love. She was a part of our early marriage.

So home we came via the grocery for I got some coupons from the folks for another $4.65 Orange Juice for $1.97 so I stopped in to grab it for the add ceased tonight.

I hope you all had a nice week end
There is a buzz going around over a blogging retreat in Florida for those of our circle.
My Beloved even said to me that he would love to see if there could be a way to make that happen.



Please consider to continue to pray for my Sister in the loss of her Son.
Also for my niece (her daughter) and her (grand) child to be born to her any day now.

What office supply are you?

You Are a Coffee Mug

You have loads of energy and stamina. You can zip through the most boring of tasks with complete enthusiasm. You are also great at motivating a group. You are a fearless leader. You are efficient and productive. You don't put off tasks or procrastinate. You actually enjoy working. You would make a good small business owner or start up employee. If a job requires blood, sweat, and tears - then you have some to give.

What Office Supply Are You?

That garden thief!!!!!!!!!

Willy Wonka ate all my tomatoes!
Then barfed them out on the living room floor!

On a brighter note.
I harvested radish and more snap peas this morning.
The radish are so good!
How I do love to see Dash eat the peas. Too cool to watch a child devour healthy foods.
Now think about it
the dog eats it and I am frustrated and angry...
The boy eats of it and it brings me joy...
Well introspective and humor overcomes it all A'...
Considering all joy.
:)
Although I would really like to get to enjoy some of my hard work on the tomatoes...

this plant had 5-6 3" fruits ready to harvest....had being the operative word.

we have got to find a way to protect them.

This morning in the garden
The black lined hills are the watermelon and cantaloupe

That old Simpson lettuce (to the left) is still a joy.

The cantaloupe is very happy.
"Moon and stars" watermelon, an old heirloom variety.
They are so beautiful
The leaves and the fruit have bright yellow spots on them.

The radish harvest still left many yet to grow...
Pole beans behind are thriving.

Onion are doing well too..
There are a few carrots coming up to the right in the row.

Strawberries are doing great. Yet we are having a bit of browning on the leaves I need to investigate. Any berry growers out there got a clue?
A few tasks of the day...
Breakfast cookies
bread
grind wheat
juice lemons
clean up sewing room (what I really want to do)
unpack the books in the living room
Yes...taxes too.
...but first a shower
a birthday party at a noisy place to attend with with Dove
Dash and Daddy are going to have time together.
Rest is over.
Rice and beans are in my tummy, and everyone else is getting ready to enjoy them too. The family loves that staple and I got them finished this morning.

Daddy man fixed me a plate and I sat here for a rest so the pain pill could ease my back.
Time to get back up and scoop the cookies onto a sheet.
Steve took the lemon cubes out of the deep freezer for me and now the cookie sheets are free of the cube trays and are awaiting me...
See ya!
I just love the garden in the morning. Enjoy the day... :)

Thankful Thursday

Come home to our heart
I visited a woman today to see if perhaps I might hire her to facilitate me on the road to heal in my journey with having the remnants of P.T.S.D.. It was a visit with the intent that I attended simply out of a respect for her. I had thought of it being a mute point as to whether I continue in any kind of counseling. You see I just simple want to accept that I am who I am and the odd memory issues are just a part of being me. All in all I have gotten off pretty easy (sort of) considering what I have known.
I was so very pleasantly surprised to hear a message that has been echoing within me all the while. It is the message of coming home to my heart. I once lived here within the spirit sorta disconnected from my body and mind. Over the last several years I have shifted over to my intellect. Still disconnected from my body. Well, all the while the pendulum swing of life creating a balance in time. To return to my heart and be true to who I am in all the strength and power of who God created me, to become even before the very foundations of time.
I want to spend some time reconnecting myself to hear that quiet almost silent need of my heart. A cry of my heart to pay attention to my needs. To what I am feeling or experiencing. Fundamentalism in my faith really messed me up in my relationship with God. It took a intimate friendship and turned it into a lot of do's and don't s in order to be acceptable, to be accepted by the God who has accepted me already.
My friendship with God even hindered the religious around me often causing me to feel like I messed up; By leaving another hindered or confused. When God allowed me opportunities of obedience with the divine, often it was a hindrance to others. I took that on as causing another to stumble and accuse My Loving Friend My Creator God to be blamed by others for being absent and allowing a trial.
It says it NO WHERE (IN MY BIBLE) that we will be without trial. IT says NO WHERE That you are doing Christianity wrong if a trial comes your way. Repeatedly I read that considering it joy at these time is the call, to endure affliction to gain the greater character assets that will bring the pleasure, the reward.
That balance...for me to say hello to my own soul. To stop and hear my physical needs. To come and sit still in the quiet.

Each person is responsible for their own life. I am not responsible for hindering anyone else as long as I am true in obedience to the call within my heart. That call to walk in the beauty and power of who I am. I believe that kindness is power. Yet often I have neglected to afford my self that same kindness. This is another thing I am coming into balance (again) visiting this issue repeats. I must really come to believe this and put it into practice.

I might hire her to support me in this or I may not and just attempt to scale this on my own.
First and foremost for me right now is simply to let it be alright with me, that I am how I am (in regard to all things but in reference to the memory problems).

In my mind, through the intellect, I have pursued full restoration.
The joy I now believe (or am coming to believe) is in accepting this cracked clay pot. I am accepted and loved for who/ and how I am by my maker.

Tonight my beautiful, powerful frustrated son was having a fit over a consequence. His mind works in a way that is so highly intelligent that the immaturity of his youth gets him into a lot of frustration and anger. Just like me when I was a kid, and even now at times.

I had a statement made today by this counselor that perhaps maybe I see my self in my son, and that is why I get so stressed out by him. It rang truth deeply in me. Ya know... I never ever even thought of it. This kid is just like I was at his age. I was able to handle my response to him totally differently. I did not get mad at all! I just repeated my boundary with him. I set my authority and helped him walk through his fit! I was amazing! I remembered how hard it was to be me when I was a kid. How hard I fought against the bricks. He gained composure and humility and stepped down off of his intellectual high horse. Not broken but reined in. He just went to bed in peace!

Yes.
Acceptance of this clay pot... I can find the beauty in the bisque and porous texture. :) I will love others as myself...gotta start loving me to get there.

Thank God for the balance gained in life's pendulum swing. It eventually comes to center.
At least it passes it by now and again.

"Simple gravity pendulum" assumes no air resistance and no friction.

Maybe restoration is not the best goal perhaps acceptance is the better target to aim for.

Word filled Wednesday

join us at the 160 acre woods

I'll catch you up a bit...

Good afternoon folks.
Today is a full day now lulled by a few sweet hours of rest. I'll need to get up to do some chores ,but for now my bones are wherry. Cleaning that garage took a lot of strength so I am looking forward to gaining it back.
The kids had ortho appointments this morning then I had the joy of listening to two kids read aloud to me at the elementary.
Moms In touch met early today due to a short school day for the kids.
Two of the three of us are dealing this week with a death. My dear friend just put her Mother to rest not knowing her souls final result.
I returned home 20 minutes before the school bus.

The children had a issue with words of violence and anger.
Dash has a very angry friend around him at school.

I saw an action during prayer and followed through.

My kids Uncle gave them a beautiful wooden Japanese fighting sword.
I called them to sit around the chair I sat in.
Holding the sword I pretended to slash at the air.
I told them of the swords effect.
Pretending to wield it at friend and/ or at foe.
Telling them about the effect that cutting down your own will leave your without defense.
How even cutting down others you still miss the real enemy.
That our enemy is not the people wielding swords at us. They are just swinging at anything trying to defend them self right or wrong they may be
I told them the word of God is a sword.
Then I had them hold their tongues. They then were once again told how it too is a sword.
They can protect/defend themselves, but they are not to cut others or slice them back out of revenge or attack. It is not alright to come home and slice us apart with the frustration of being swung at all day.
They got the point.
Dove gave a fit for the beginning, then by the end came to me and thanked me for the lesson.
Oh God is good. Gave me the wisdom, showed me the picture to walk into.

So it is yet early.

On the week end we had Dash's party...

We transformed this into...
This
and this...
During the party a wonderful little girl had me even playing hop scotch. It was a bit awkward but so dear of her.
Of course there were presents.
After the pinyata was wacked hard and cracked open by Dove first blow, then knocked off the toop by the second kid I just tore it open and tossed up the cand to the glee of the kids.
The treat bags were collected and in them I placed a few little treats of sports things.
The cake had a good "bite" out of it...
The red lemon aide pot was full and kept the thirsty kids satisfied and many left overs too.

All the kids were up the tree for the group shot.
It was a wonderful time with my friend Deb.
She stayed and helped out a lot.
She is such a good hearted woman.
I am so fortunate to be friends with her. Our husbands are friends too.
The kids are so fond of each other.

Steve closed the party down because I had to get Dove to her engagement.
I am so glad we were late...
The Parent let 8 8-9 year old girls walk to a park from the apartment complex they live in. That is a busy long walk on and off a majer road.
A road that if the short cut is taken can eaily endanger them.
I was stunned!
No I am not going to leave my kid at the park. So I took the other mom back to the apartment and told her nope I dont think so...
I told her I would be willing to take my daughter over there in my car. I asked her for a head count of kids to get back and she did not even really know for sure.
I am not liking this...
Not my way.
So these beautiful girls were left un attended at a huge park where there are many people milling about. Numbers can not help a kid, except perhaps to give a description after the fact.
The two girls front right were on lent fast. I learned a bit from Annett about it. I was proud of the kids for they denied themselves soda.

The mom and the neighbor came home with me to have me string a necklace that the neighbor treasured. It was about to break apart.
I restrung it and afixed a clasp to it.
They left and at 8:30 p.m. My day was almost done.
Sunday morning I slept in.

Steve and I had a date on Sunday mid day.
We went to a Bluegrass concert. Cherryholmes was the band and they sang from a gospel bent.
It was a wonderful time. A childrens bluegrass band opened for them. I really enjoyed the old gospel blue grass songs. The time with Steve was so refreshing.
We had our retiernment first sorta.
Now we get very precious time alone.
Funny we thought "how cool it would be for the kids to get to see this."

It was garage for Monday and Tuesday, today...well a meal yet to make and a kitchen to clean.
Then rest. Rest...
I have been a bit ill to the bowel for two days now and so my body wants me to slow down.
I may have to go make sure I am not fighting off a UTI.
Rest...Cranberry juice...did I mention rest...........

To my dear dial up friends, fine tuned my blog so it will come up faster for you.

I worked at length the remove all the links to the awards and a few of the other side bar things. I do hope you notice a faster upload. I am told by Steve that it will take the second time to see the difference for the links have been turned into pictures. It took some doing.

You right click on the image and save image.
by hitting home key add a number system , no spaces and watch that the address is the same IE jpg or jif
Then remove the side bar thing.
Add it now in customize using the picture thing not the html
Add it back and rearrange.
be prepared I have been at it for two hours.
I turned 52 into pics. I was surprised at how many awards I have received over the couple of years I have been blogging. Thank you all for all that encouragement.

Chickens hid the eggs for three days!

I just went out to the coop to gather eggs.
This our afternoon task.
Well for three days now when we go out we have only gotten one egg.
I look down the nests and all empty.
The only egg was on the ground or in the far right side of the coop
Way at the left end is no man's (chicken's) land.
This area of the coop they will (so I thought) never go to and have always left vacant of any action. I could put food down there to entice them and they would still avoid it.
At that far end a couple of the dividers are only a few inches apart.
My hens wiggled them a bit wider and thought they had achieved success at hiding the eggs.
They had for THREE days!
It has been cool here so I trust that they are still good.
Silly birds.
Here I was getting concerned about them.
Goofballs!
The kids and I just had a real good laugh, for non of us saw them when we each took turns (more than once a day) to gather the eggs.,

Gratituesday

Unplugging the dam...
In causeways all across this nation there is a movement a foot.
To open hands and hearts.
There is also the opposing to hold on and dig in.

It had been my life to be the one with a trunk full of unneeded goods that all my friends had open rights too.
Anytime I would visit someone it was the norm to say I have some stuff I am finished with , or have need of no longer out in the trunk, come see if there is anything you can find use of.

This the topic of my Gratituesday.
With that occurrence coupled with the stress and just plain lack of time and energy we have become clogged with means.
Funny thing how being given so much there is much required of us.
After ceasing the home school dream and following into Gods plan for our kids it has been excruciating to let go of the classroom of things worked so hard for.
It is so difficult to give away the garmets I hope one day to fit into.
Knowing with the cost of goods it may never be that I will have access to then again. It is hard to know what to give and what to hold onto. Yet there is a time for everything under the sun.
Reality is that in the early 50's your earning power decreases significantly.

Just over five years ago my sweet husband lost his 25+ career when the plant shut down and he was on of the last of 6000 men and women who lost their jobs.
We went down 2/3 rd's in income.
Yet we are making it and blessed abundantly.

All across this nation it is happening again now to so many many families.
When this happened for us it cause a clog in the dam.
The flow was diverted into the fear of possible want.
"One day we may need this and we will not have the means to acquire it"
Yes, there is a truth to that, yet balance needs be acquired as well.

This clog in the dam and the busy life that stops the flow...
This is what I am tending to today.
It is with great relief I am letting go.
It is a freedom.
It is trust.
Faith.
Love.
It is time.

Tackle it Tuesday

The Salvation Army Guys came today and hauled off a good amount of toys and home school books and many other things.
A garden center for me
and...

a shop for my Beloved
<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>
There is a lot to do yet,
I know he will be surprised.
Just one more hour and he will be home.
I am so excited and dusty and tired:)

updated

On Friday evening we received an automated phone call from the
Salvation Army,
they would be in our area on Tuesday to collect. They asked if we might have donations. OH YES! We have donations!
That phone call set the schedule for today and tomorrow.
Today I set to task.
Filling both the recycle can and the black trash can.
Many, many toys were collected as I went through the collections boxed and also scattered on the garage floor.
My kids had found a new place to play.
Monday Morning
Steve had to shut down the party on Saturday last so I could get Dove to her engagement in a hurry. So left for me was the large box of decorations and such to put away and stow into the rightful places.
I am done with this mess!
Between medical appointments, dental implant, IEP"s for Dash, Death and life I had yet to get to do this job.
It has awaited my attention for almost 7 months!

Dash had found all of his cars and in the process get into boxes of toys and scatter them.

Monday mid-day

All of this was separated to be incorporated into the house.
The camper has also been emptied. Many of the things from it are going into the kitchen to be made use of.

In a way it looks little different, yet all those boxes are books that I am not able or willing to hurt myself lifting. Soon they will come back into the house and placed in the prospective book shelves. So many things to weed through and sort out, but I took a lot out of it today.

See the empty boxes...Those are toys there to sort.
Lunch came and this task will be worked on more in the morrow.

So far several boxes of things going out...folks will find uses for them and the Salvation army an income from them. There are many things on the side of the truck as well.
Ya, lot done here.

Mid afternoon
forced rest :)
That big box is those toys to sort. All of the other boxes are in the house to be unloaded onto the book shelves that are hungry to absorb them.

This much clear, many many boxes of good books.

That is all books or photo albums or my novel stuff.

Monday and Tuesday and many more days....
The Garage of
"we are moving...No, we are not moving..."
Eight months later...

Enough!
This is being forced to the top of the priority bubble.

yes!
6 pm Monday!
Car in the garage!
Other side tomorrow.
Pain Pill tonight!
:)