Free to be me Florida Christian Bloggers Retreat Part 5 time to go home

The last of the trip was a walk into my own home.

It was that morning I relized painfully that....

I did not want to come home.

Embraced in the arms of two very kind and loving women, nurtured in their prayers over me I had a real good cry. I knew what coming home would mean.

Three long weeks of weekly knee injections.

Dealing with the IEP for Dove, and with her special needs.

Those continuous sleepless nights holding her so she could rest. Those hours wonderful in intimacy as she opened her heart left both of us less than full functional in the morning.

Knowing that I would have to face those fears of getting her back into psychiatric care.

All that was required of me to tend husband, family and home.

When I told Steve later of that morning I was stunned as his reply..."I sure don't blame you for feeling that way"...

The chestnut trees left little balls of provision all over the ground.

Harder than a pecan to crack but just as tasty

 

 

As I sat in the morning sun I saw a great winged bird gliding my way on the breeze and ask him to come to me that I might see him and he turned away as I heard within my heart it is now time to wing my own way home.

I sat with the sun in my face.

Knowing that I would be made able to face all those things ahead of me.

That the strength to do so would be given me as I needed it.

Perhaps not before.

It was enough to draw my heart back to them, back to the differences in parenting methods, the moral issues that I laid down to submit my will under the authority of my husband.

The therapy tasks ahead with the EDMR and all of the other issues we left to trust.

I pulled up my inner boots and set my heart to home and left all of the luxury of sleep and sisterly care behind.

A wonderful drive was had as the four of us went to the Tallahassee airport.

Angie (Sweet Pea) drove, as my Dear Joanne (Turtle Dove ) humored us with the Zebra Butt . Lynn sat ap front and we all just really enjoyed those last few minutes with our beloved Angie.

Once to the airport the migraine began to set in only moments before security.

Well talk about security.

4 times and the alarm just kept going off on me!

It was discovered to be my head band!

Then the girls behind me...all of my luggage was searched.

Unpacked and rifeled through.

It was my bible that drove them buggy.

I had someone laugh later saying someone needed to be reading their bible that day

:)

Lynn stepped up like a mother to me and just led me through the process of getting put all back together.

It was tough for the migraine that we were all aware was beginning to set against me was not improved by being searched!

Joanne and Lynn took such good care of me to get all put back together and to get me to some beverage. They even reminded me to stop at a keyosk for some Tylenol I was so flustered.

So we sat gate side and enjoyed one another. Lynn (cloud walker walks softly) was before me hearing of how My visit to the last days of my mothers life gave way to forgive her...just then over the intercom in the background played Mommas song..."she'll be coming around the mountain when she comes." As I boarded the craft I once again took advantage of the opportunity for the wheel chair to help me when I landed.

Upon boarding I was asked by the person who sat nest to me if I would trade seats seats with another. You know there was an opening just above that other seat for my case and the girl beside me was so kind as to go get my little bag of stuff for me. I was sore embarrassed for I thought she was with the other two and spoke to her as if she were. I could not apologize or say anything for it would of just made it worse. I just did my best to pray for the situation and gain some humility and care of lesson for future reference.

So after the awkward flight she even lifted down my bags for me. The announcement came that all who had need of wheelchair to deboard last. So I sat until the plain was empty.

We had the most authoritative caring through stewardess  during the flight . This woman really cared about us every one and would have no part of blowing off the safety instructions. To the point of confronting a person with a cell phone. My thought was who this lady really cares about our lives .

Well I told her so. How I felt about the way she did her job.

She had tears in her eyes and said WE don't hear that angle on it very often.

I had to relieve myself so bad that I thought I would pop!

The wheel chair was not noted on the stewardess papers.

So I waited and while I did relieved myself in that empty planes restroom and as I was finishing up the tank was opened to be emptied and I flew with my pants up out the door in a start. Sorta funny really. I waited and eternity and the plain was already behind schedule. They confirmed that they would get me on the next flight if I missed it.

The pilot wanted to have the lift take me off and I told him that i Could make it down the steep steps It would just be a bit painful but I could do it.

He would hear no part of it.

Eventually however that is just what I did. I was right it hurt but then there was a tram to take me to the terminal through the tarmac it was so cool.

 

 

She was so sweet and just would hear no part of me trying to go it without the chair.

In Atlanta the airport is larger than any other in the US

 

Check it out this is the cock pit.

What a cool adventure.

I just kept thinking of looking at the trip as an adventure.

  

That it was .

I drove through the tarmac.

Jet engines blowing against the tarp.

 

We wheeled around the baggage trolley's.

 

My case on the back.

 

My driver to the left stopped for an elder and grown son, and a child traveling alone.

The child sat beside me.

I encouraged her and reminded her to stay with an employee at all times.

 

That is an active engine very loud!

Well we got into the terminal after driving all the length of around 6-10 gates and then into a place where we were met by a wheel chair and up an elevator.

We were together as a group.

A fellow came and pushed that chair with me in it in a real hurry all the way to the far end of that other terminal.

I gave that fellow a $20 tip for it and boy did he earn it. He got me to the transit a train under the terminal and we were at the gate as the plane was boarded a FULL flight.

I stood there against a wall waiting for the chair to come back from the longest tunnel I have ever gone down to get on a plane. By this time I was really really hurting. Without any of the synvisk left in my knee it was full on bone on bone a long weekend, flight and bumps to boot. It was a long 20 minute to sit in the chair facing backward.

Once on board the attendant was not help.

I was way back on the plane and amazingly one of the last to board there was right above my row a place just right for my suitcase. However I was so worn out and afraid to lift it over the mans head I hessitated. Then I told Him I was afraid and asked him if he would close his lap top.

He said to lift it and that he would push it up and help me.

We did it!

I had just enough of the drink left to get two pain pills in.

I was in the window seat. So the two men stepped out for me to get in.

 

The view was beautiful as we crossed the states.

It was a very nice flight.

A meal was purchased of a giro, it was so good!

I just slept and rested.

When we landed again it was asked for those who need assistance to wait.

You know that fellow on the row, actually asked me out before him.

I told him I had to await my chariot and smiled.

He lifted down the case!

I waited untill almost everyone was off and slowly got down that long isle off the plane.

A wheel chair fellow helped me to get through the terminal and into the embrace of my awaiting family.

It was sorta hard to walk so I took it slow to the car. If I had not of taken advantage of all the help I would not of been able to walk to the car. My kids would of been freaked out, but I just told them I was tired. We went on home.

The next day was school adn steve stayed home and took me for the first injection.

I could hardly get back to the car.

The nurse was not kind she did not get that I had been on a plane the day before.

Steve was kind.

Well now it is three weeks later.

Three injections in both knees

Two unexpected root canals

an IEP for dove

Appointments set to get her intervention

rearranged Dash's bedroom

Last night moved Doves bed into dashes room

h1n1 flu shots for the kids

a full week ahead including

a 80 minute dental appointment for the build up and crown

Dash has an ASU research appointment

Dove gets new bands

A trial to testify at on Thursday...

Thanksgiving only 10 days away?

I am home.

Dove slept for the first time through the night last night! 

Last night I slept 11 hours!

just this moment an officer is walking away from my door for I had to again call 911 for a very aggressive sales person would not leave and refused to to leave my door.

I am shaking!

boy that makes me mad!

Oh I am getting a security screen door!

A life in the day, or a day in the life of...

Yesterday a wonderfully strange day.
I went to the MD for the follow up and got a rx for the h1n1 shot if I can find one.
Went to the grocery adn got to the register without my Debit card, drove home and got it, went back and got the groceries. This the first time in three weeks to shop due to the knee shot thing.

When I was unloading the car I saw a neighbor and hollered over to her for tea. She said make it coffee and I will be there in 20 minutes. So I ran in and did a 30 second tidy . Unloaded the grocery bags that had the cold stuff in it. I left everything else out in the garage for Steve to carry in. My neighbor told me a a place I had never heard of in my neighborhood so we each drove over rand then we shopped this cute little discount decor store.

I stopped and got the paint for Dove's bedroom.

The kids came home, homework and then some efforts toward a response to an e-mail I received.
It was sorta intense so I dropped the ball a bit on getting ready for Dove's band concert. It was so cute to see her play her french horn.

Today I have quiet moment to rest a spell after a morning of tasks. Cupcakes, and the chicken coop done this morning.

 

 The tea that you left in the gift basket Angie is being enjoyed.

Today I had a visit with Earl Grey.

With some struggle the compost was moved over to the other side of the yard.

The hardest part was keeping the dogs out of the stuff.

I filled it up with the coop poop.

It will now be close to the garden and the water as well.

 

 

This end of the yard is being sceduled to get a redo as soon as my knees will let me.

With the compost out of there I might be able to get the rock given away and the beds fenced and planted. I look so forward to this mess getting cleaned up.

 

 Today's harvest.

 

 The spaghetti squash was awesome . I oven steamed it in a shallow water bath. Served it with cardamon and butter. The side was green beans and corn also from the garden we had a meatless dinner. IT WAS SO GOOD! everything on the plate from the garden.I was like a major milestone moment. I will harvest and save seed for next season. These have been washed and now are drying.

 

How sweet this week the kind notes recieved from Angie, oh dear heart your kindness was a warm embrace on a hard day. The timing was perfect. Lynn, I miss you too so much. It is a sweet gift to be with you in Florida.  Alisha your very welcome .

The cute thank you not from is Alisha.

Ill post some garden images over at the Bee bliss Blog.

Dash was invited by Arizona State University to take part in a hearing aide study.

I spoke with the research professor who is in charge. We spoke of all the federal funding gone now from the children s clinic and I told her we were now out of pocket. She said that they will do his hearing test for free. They will also try to include any need that Dash might have within the time limit of the 2 hour study. Dash will be paid $30, for it. They are testing a new type of hearing aide for kids that has a background noise neutralizer.

Now lets see what was that prayer...

"God , Please make a way for us to meet Dash's hearing needs, and make us a way to manage his hearing aides and ear molds."

Thank you Dear Sweet Lord for listening and caring enough to throw in a way for Dash to feel important about it too.

An apointment made now for Dove to go back to the Phyciatrist...set asap for JANUARY!

However we will be put on a cancellation list...watch and see :)

Her former Ocupational therapist will also contact us about getting that started up again.

Now lets see just how he is going to make a way for those co-pays :)

Well I am sorta tired...be blessed for I am going to go rest.

by the way Dove is bedding in our room now on a palate on the floor, she has slept 2 nights around a least 6-7 hours, rejoice with me. Steve and I each got around 5-6 hours each as we endured her snoring. She is still recovering the cold she is so sweet and thoughtful. What a kind kid.

Amazing head way with Dove

Thank  you for your prayers. Dove opened up tonight and told us what it is like to be her.
She described the ADID (attention deficit inactive disorder), the sensory integration and the lack of internal security she feels.

She gave us detailed images and daily expierences of what her life is like. We have now to get the help this child needs. I do not understand the way that will come to cover the co-pays and such but it is well with my soul.

I will get her back into the melmed center that helped me when she was younger. It is 22 miles one way.
Therapy will begin again it looks like.

Thank you, thank you all for the prayers for my daughter.
This child has opened our eyes of understanding. She has made her father understand those things that I could not. God has healed our little family and unity of purpose and understanding now prevails. We will give band aide solutions until I can get the cure or intervention set in place.
Lots of work to do.

Charity Begins at Home. This Country is OUR home.

Free to be me: Alecia Potter Corbin

I'd like to Introduce to you,

The Corbin Family.

Alecia and her husband Michael and their two beautiful children are full time Missionaries for Family Life Ministries(www.familylife.com). They have placed their complete trust in the LORD for ALL of their needs including a place to live while they are out on the missions field and every resource that is needed.

Alecia was one of the speakers at the Retreat and as I sat listening to their testimony and her humility in serving the LORD as a full time missionary and in her desire to be all that HE would have her to be as a wife and mother.

It is their heart in union to serve here State Side to strengthen American families in need.  

To do so they must first establish their own funding.

They will be serving under the umbrella of Campus Crusade for Christ.

She left us with a lasting statement that her family is truly living: "Hold the cloak of materialism loosely".

I ask if everyone who reads this would first pray for Michael, Alecia and their beautiful children and the humble work the LORD has commissioned them to do.

Then, would you visit with them at their CorbinLife blog or facebook at: Alecia Potter Corbin or Email ministry@corbinlife.com and give them WORDS of Encouragement in the LORD.

And then if the LORD touches your heart to partner with them monthly or to sow a seed one-time Donation into their lives to help support them, then please contact them directly. I'm sure the LORD will multiply whatever seeds are sown. He's just that type of GOD. He's amazing! Amen!


by Lisa: There are people who come into our lives that leave lasting impacts small and great. Faces that long into our years we will remember. Names that will stay on our lips in prayer even if time, the distance of the miles and the journey's are in different directions -- STILL those people will remain some how in the banks of your mind and heart. Alecia is one of those people to me. I will long remember her in the journey of my years and while our paths are different our end-goal is the same and that is for our lives to be used for the glory of the LORD.

I so agree. As I told this young woman that there are many types of soldiers.

They lay down their lives for others. That it takes a purple heart of a soul to do so.

It will be a battle for this family, they know it will not be easy.

They have sold their home, and will be working full time.

Leaving there employment to do so.

They lay down their lives!

That is what they so profoundly believe that their path is to walk.

After a wonderful conversation with Alisha last night on the phone the thought of putting this out here for all of you who care so much about the lives of others in your world. 

Visit her with at the very least a word or two to encourage them. 

Thank you
 Feel free to copy and post this community service.

Has our history become such a blur?

they wanted to remove the crosses...

 Those who fought through out the history of our nation are to be honored.

Is this nation so short sighted as too recognize these heroes of today to simply forget the heros of yesterdays lore.

Lore, all the facts and traditions about a particular subject that have been accumulated over time through education or experience.

 

All gave some but some gave all.

Many fought for country in their idealism.

Those Ideals however have even been tossed by our very own governing peoples.

It is not only this time in history that we are to honor our Veterans.

Remember those who came before and what they fought for.

What are we fighting for now?

Where has our compass gone or what has it become.

For all of those who have kept compass and the ideal I solute you.

Do you see a time when there has not been a war?
If we could just remember our history.

18th Century

• American Revolutionary War, 1775 – 1783
  
  • Boston campaign, 1775 - 1776
  • Canadian Theatre, 1775 - 1776
  • New York and New Jersey campaign, 1776 - 1777
  • Saratoga Campaign, 1777
  • Philadelphia Campaign, 1777 - 1778
  • Western Theatre, 1775 - 1782
  • Northern Theater, 1778 - 1781
  • Southern Theatre, 1775 - 1782
  
  
• Northwest Indian War, 1785 - 1795
• Quasi-War, France, 1798 – 1800

[edit] 19th Century

• First Barbary War, 1801 – 1805
• War of 1812, 1812 – 1815
  
  • Tecumseh's Rebellion, 1811 - 1813
  • Lake Champlain Campaign, 1812 - 1814
  • Niagara Campaign, 1812 - 1814
  • Detroit Campaign, 1812 - 1814
  • Chesapeake Campaign, 1813 - 1814
  • Creek War, 1813 - 1814
  • Peoria War, 1813
  • Southern Campaign,
  
  
• Second Barbary War, 1815
• First Seminole War, 1817 - 1818
• Winnebago War, 1827
• Black Hawk War, 1832
• Second Seminole War, 1835 - 1842
• Mexican-American War, 1846 – 1848
• Cayuse War, 1847 - 1855
• Third Seminole War, 1855 - 1858
• American Civil War, 1861 – 1865
  
  • Union blockade, 1861 - 1865
  • Eastern Theater, 1861 - 1865
  • Western Theater, 1861 - 1865
  • Lower Seaboard Theater, 1861 - 1865
  • Trans-Mississippi Theater, 1861 - 1865
  • Dakota Conflict, 1862
  • Pacific Coast Theater, 1863
  • Colorado War, 1863 - 1865
  
  
• Red Cloud's War, 1866 - 1868
• Korean Expedition, 1871
• Modoc War, 1872 - 1873
• Red River War, 1874 - 1875
• Black Hills War, 1876 - 1877
• Nez Perce War, 1877
• Bannock War, 1878
• Cheyenne War, 1878 - 1879
• Sheepeater Indian War, 1879
• Ute War, 1879-1880
• Pine Ridge Campaign, 1890-1891
• Battle of Leech Lake, 1898
• Spanish-American War, 1898
• Philippine-American War, 1899 - 1913

[edit] 20th Century

• Boxer Rebellion, 1899 - 1901
• Banana Wars:
  
  • United States occupation of Nicaragua, 1907-1933
  • United States occupation of Honduras, 1907-1933
  • United States overthrow of Guatemalan Government, 1907-1933
  • Intervention during Panamanian Election, 1908
  • United States occupation of Cuba, 1912
  • United States occupation of Veracruz, 1914
  • United States occupation of Haiti, 1915-1934
  • United States occupation of the Dominican Republic, 1917-1924
  
  
• Mexican Expedition, 1916 - 1917
  
  • Battle of Ambros Nogales, 1918
  
  
• World War I, 1917 – 1918 (time span of U.S. involvement)
  
  • European Theatre, 1917 - 1918
  • First Battle of the Atlantic, 1917 - 1918
  
  
• Russian Revolution, 1918-1920 (time span of U.S. involvement)
  
  • Polar Bear Expedition, 1918 - 1919
  • American Expeditionary Force Siberia, Soviet Union, 1918 - 1920
  
  
• World War II, 1941 – 1945 (time span of U.S. involvement)
  
  • Second Battle of the Atlantic, 1941 - 1945
  • Pacific War, 1941 - 1945
  • African Theatre, 1942 - 1943
  • European Theatre, 1944 - 1945
  
  
• Korean War, 1950 - 1953
• Operation Blue Bat, Lebanon, 1958
• Bay of Pigs Invasion, Cuba, 1961
• Operation Powerpack, Dominican Republic, 1965 - 1966
• Vietnam War, 1962 - 1973 (time span of United States involvement)
  
  • Laotian Civil War, 1962 - 1973
  • Cambodian Civil War, 1969 - 1970
  
  
• Contra War, El Salvador, 1981-1990
• Invasion of Grenada, Grenada, 1983-1984
• Iran–Iraq War, 1987 - 1989
• United States invasion of Panama 1989 - 1990
• Persian Gulf War, Iraq, 1991
  
  • Operation Desert Shield, 1991
  • Operation Desert Storm, 1991
  
  
• Somali Civil War, 1992 - 1994
  
  • Operation Provide Relief, 1992
  • Operation Restore Hope, 1992 - 1994
  
  
• Yugoslav wars, 1994 - 1999
  
  • Bosnian Conflict, 1994 - 1995
  • Kosovo Conflict, 1997 - 1999
  
  

[edit] 21st Century

• War on Terrorism, 2001 - present
  
  • Operation Enduring Freedom - Afghanistan 2001 - present
  • Operation Enduring Freedom - Philippines 2002 - present
  • Operation Enduring Freedom - Horn of Africa 2002 - present
  • Operation Iraqi Freedom, 2003 - present
  • War in North-West Pakistan, 2004 - present
  • War in Somalia, 2006 - 2009
  • Operation Enduring Freedom - Trans Sahara 2007 - present
  
  

Outdoor Wednesday

 

 

Today's Harvest
Spaghetti squash just under 4 pounds

Sun tea, yes it is that hot here mid 80's today.

The kids went in and we got them their h1n1 shots.

They have the day off and I have been taking it slow.

The pillow even got to see my sweet cheek, slept until 9 am. that is something for me.

Dove is really well today, bless God in time to make the inoculation appointment in good health.

She really put us such a huge fuss, almost had to call a nurse to help me get her out of the bathroom and the pediatrician's office. You know it was one of the first times I realized she is almost big enough for me not to be able to do anything about it if she refused.

So with the wisdom of lessons learned I gave her the old two choices within my peramiters. Makes her think she has control thus the security is established.

Told her she could come to the room herself or I will have to call a nurse to help me to take her there.

She promptly stopped refusing. I told her I knew she was afraid. Then it dawned on me there was NO reasoning when she is like this and so the old two within came to mind and I went for it.

Meanwhile Dash is across the hall, awaiting his shot, with a bit of grown up and little boy... mom come... look in his sweet little eyes.

Dove is really taking a lot of the efforts at those times and so I just hugged Dove let go and went to Dash. I supported his courage and told him "melted butter" and his little arm relaxed he took a breadth and she did the deed and he was over it.

So Dove was up and fought us...I had to bear hug her standing up and hold her head to one side and kiss on her. The shot was given and then it was like oh! nothing's wrong I'm fine mom.

aaaaa oh o.k. alright.

The nurse and I exchanged smiles and I thanked her. The shot was free and my insurance billed the visit.No co-pay.

Now to get one for me. The doc office said no to adults only kids high risk. Because my kids are high risk I explained to her I think she may want to check again.

Oh another battle , I'll see the doc in the morning for the sot? and for the neuro follow-up.

IEP explination

 Yesterday Steve stayed home in the morning to get Dash to the bus stop and tend Dove until I could return. Daddy Man has too many banked hours so he HAS to use them. With all the medical stuff around here the last three weeks it has been a real God send.

So I arrive at the meeting tired of course from Dove keeping me up of course.
By the way they have no school today and she is better, go figure...she still has a cough first thing this morning but her energies are up and she is much brighter. Thank you for your prayers.

Anyway the IEP
So I parked way over near that office and decided to forgo the office check in. Limping I made it somewhat painfully , looking like an old lady (no offense to anyone) I am only 48. Doves Teacher was there we spoke , she is a veteran teacher and a real gift from God. The others arrived soon after. Two special ED teachers and lastly the school psychologist. I asked them to climb the three steps ahead of me. Monday I had the last knee injections and those sweet knees of mine were non to happy to climb steps. Humbly I made it up them.

The meeting began I mentioned that her third grade teacher might attend and the eyes of the psychologist opened wide. She was a bit ill with cold poor thing. She asked me what I saw at home.
I told them of the stress that the child does not sleep. That the MD was concerned of the educational stress on her that perhaps she may need to see a psyc. Her response was "perhaps you might follow through with that."...my blood began to boil at that. I told them she works very diligently on her home work. Her esteem is faltering because of her self image as not being smart as the others. The teacher spoke up saying..."You know we are a progressive school and several of the 5th graders are working at a 6-7 grade level." I know she has a full class I told her and I am not asking her to favor my kid. Just that we all see fit to meet this child's needs. I told them the child has wholes that are hindering her. Now I did not know if the homeschooling was an issue in her k-2 years if I missed something or not. Even so this girl is not alright. She has learning disabilities and I want to discover the wholes that we as educators can fill and do so. "Look, my bag is out of tools and I am asking for your help!".
She has abstract issues that are hard for me as a lay person to explain to them that is what I am asking them to test her for that they might identify the issues.

The point being the educational stress was the issue we were all sitting there. Then the teacher spoke.
She sees a little girl who is trying so hard. She will light up when she knows the answer and then pale as she is called on...(sounds like the Attention Inactive Disorder) I said. She is imaginative and produces amazing writings but the words she should know are spelled phonetically. She pointed out that I taught her Spalding in home school. She Sees my daughter doing fairly well (this trills me) yet she does see that the issues in the future will hinder her badly once she gets to the Jr High level. She backed down from her stand a bit from when we spoke on the phone. After the special ED teacher was Sighting some testing that supposed to not pay attention to writing standards like spelling and sentence structure. Two of Doves big hindrances.

Then the Special ED teacher said this...oh yes she did!
Get ready for a jaw dropping temptation to anger.
Comparing the children to Swiss cheese...

well ya know she began..."Speaking of holes it sounds like most of our kids have way more holes than she does..."

"I understand that many children need your care but to suggest that just because her cheese is a bit more solid should dismiss her of getting the help she needs...You all need to know this When I adopted this child I became her guardian. That is my role. I am her guard and I will guard her to make sure that this kid will grow to become an interdependent adult and have the best life I can possibly give her. Although many of your kids parents may not do so for them, or may not be able too. Be assured that I am going to do so for my daughter.

They spoke a little of the kids who are in 5th grade and read at a 2nd grade level..."I said I understand that and I fight for them too.
I serve as a volunteer to the 3rd graders and help your at risk kids to learn to read weekly.

The teacher mentioned a type of computer software that might help kids like my daughter and if she could get a grant for it...I told her if I had
the $$$$$$ I would give it to her to do so. I told her to let me know what it is.

They agreed to test Dove and then if she does not qualify that they will get her a 504 writ of protection so that her needs would legally be considered...this the psyc and the Special ED teacher whispered about while the teacher was speaking.

I said I asked for this last year and I have been under the impression it was in place.

To her reply of "Oh most teacher teach like that anyway making sure that everyone's getting taught at their level, however in Jr High it would protect her." (boiling pot  at this point) I want this in place to protect her now. ( after thought ...and to empower the teachers with the equipment they need to do so for her and for other kids no one in fighting for.)

"Oh No she said it is only after the testing that it can be done if she does not quality"

...anger rose within me and I could feel it stirring me.

Breath I thought.

Then the teacher chimed in an apologized for the delay thinking it was her fault due to a short leave she took to become a grandmother. I assured her that her leave was a small measure it was the predecessor of the psyc. that dropped the ball on this.

They will test her in the Special Needs department for writing... I wish I would of caught that she needs an over all testing not just in writing elements. And the psyc will do the IQ and the observance note that she told me she would do that at the end of last year as well.

I took off my mom hat. As a woman asked them if they had children. They said yes. Then you should understand. Thanked them for their help and excused myself. The one S. ED teacher offered to get the door kindly...

OH!

The gift of the anger that came in my fatigue helped me to have the strength to do the meeting and to not be intimidated by people in authority.

the gift of anger is strength, I know that the Lord is my strength he got pretty angry too when he witnessed injustice to the needy. In fact He even was known to turn a few tables! :)

iep meeting

Sorry for the vent guys I think that the stress of late  just topped off my tank.

 Through tenacity Dove will get the testing she needs.

If I say more the anger within rises and I was enjoying the peace I fought throughout the day to obtain.

After one and a half year delay they will now begin the test that will either get her help or a 502 so she can have special considerations.

Good night

I got angry again.

Tackle it Tuesday

Individualized Education Plans
As Most of you know I am the blessed mother of two amazing special needs children.

This morning Dove's IEP meeting is at 8 am .
Dove is ill so Daddy man will cover me and get Dash on the bus.
It kills me to have to leave my daughter to go fight for her educational rights.
These rights have been ignored now for two years and I am angry.
It was said that "all things in Gods time" to me .
I thought about it and it removed the stress a bit.
Then that concept was challenged by my Husband..."that is like the old whatever will be passive stance" he said.

Well in reconsidering the wisdom of that it begs to argue...
This came to thought...
That is the type of thought that takes us out of battle and makes us patsies as Christians. It is the Enemy of all that is righteous that would have us lay down to his assaults and call them Gods will. Then we get angry and blame God consoling ourselves with "it was Gods design".

Oh God designed us for so much more. Yes God's will will be done ultimately . His timing is perfect and then man steps in in the sin and screws it all into a tangled mesh.These people made so many mistakes on Doves case. Repeatedly they neglected her educational well being.

I have paid my taxes for over 30 years. This includes the tax that covers the school systems.
We have paid over the heads of many a child to give a wage to those who are hired to perform the tasks assigned them. This is the slack that is excused.

And we excuse it in ourselves as well. It is good to allow mercy and to show forbearance. It is good to temper our wrath. But if we, if I neglect to fight for the rights of the least of these even if it is a favored child because I am Her GUARDIAN.

We are the GUARDIANS of those who have no voice. It I hold my voice silent then how many behind my own are held without what they need because either the guardians of the voiceless have either no voice or choose not to use it. What of the countless children who are without a "Guard" to keep them.

As much as it is possible be on good term with all men. Make peace with your enemy along the way...so this is my plan...

I will sign no document that makes invisible the error and neglect that this my child has been left with. I will keep my peace and if it is not honored I will shake the dust off but I will not be a patsy, I will not let them ignore on documentation that these things have occurred. It matters not that it was a predicesor who neglected Doves case. I have repeatedly addressed this issue from the end of third grade. She is now in the middle of 5th grade and this is just an insult to the role they have been hired to perform. It is our tax money that has paid the wage. I have to temper may anger so that we can be proactive this morning in the all of 15 minutes I will be given to listen to their plan and agree or not.
Even so this meeting is only to say "Oh maybe this kid just needs help lets start the testing" yes start the testing

Children with special needs come in varying degree of conditions. My kids can function well compared so I have little networking support. There is a wonderful 5 minutes for special needs kids but they have mostly the kids who are really hurting with medical conditions included. If any of you know of a more all inclusive support network will you let me know.

Well time to begin the day.
I would appreciate your prayers for my daughter who is ill, a cold possibly is all it is but it has many of the symptoms of the h1n1 flu and I am concerned over her. As well as Dash and I for we both have Asthma.

I so do not want to see my darling child targeted or separated into a sub category of children who may not be believed to matter as much as those who would be college bound. I want her to get the education she in entitled too. Gotta run

The Simple Woman's Daybook

Outside my window... Nice evening falling it is warm outside, my son is playing

I am thinking... Just sit here and do not move, Steve is home now...let him do anything needed and rest my knees. How hard it is to hear my daughter cough and not run to her and hold her.

I am thankful for... Pain medication right now. That my daughter does not have strep and for a husband that is washing the dishes.

I am wearing... My wolf t-shirt it is brown and a pair of caprices . I took off my ear rings when I laid on the sofa. no shoe either.

I am remembering... Just yesterday my knees did not hurt, the shots I got today will stop hurting me real soon.

I am going... I am going to Doves IEP it is her individualized education program. It is at 8 am I have a sick child. I am barely able to walk tonight. Wonder what I can do with the kids so they do not have to sit on the phyc steps and be embarrassed. I left a message with the teacher I serve to see if they can stay in her room with her until I am done. Dash has a speech eval coming soon and an appointment has been set.

amended...the teacher called back and is going to keep the kids in her room for me

I am reading...  a gardening Manuel and the book of Luke

I am hoping... to be able to get throught the meeting in the morning. That Dove does not have the swine flu, and that Dash and I (having asthma) are free of it.

On my mind... hope and inspiration

From the learning rooms... nothing

Noticing that... I have to keep watch over the kids and how God watching over them with and or for them/me, well I can breath.

Pondering these words... The meeting tomorrow is in Gods time
From the kitchen... My sweet husband cleaning up a mess. No supper tonight just nibbling I need to stay off my feet.

Around the house... Laundry all clean is piled on the sofa for when I am able to fold it and put it away.

One of my favorite things~ Holding my child through the night so she can sleep. love it but it exhausts me. I love to see her become more able. Understanding the attachment issues she has helps me to have a vast compassion.


From my picture journal...

The scarlet runner bean is climbing the gazebo.

It has it's first flowers on it.

opps I had not finished my lists before

Meal Plan Menu *amended*

suppers from the garden this week.

In a day or two this Spaghetti squash with be front and center to at least two meals.

I think it will weigh out at around 5-6 pound or more.

 Dash came out to the garden with me to help me.

We gave the stalks and the soil clogs to the hens.

Happy Hens

The corn all 3 ears of it will get harvested to center stage another meal

 Look at that glow that came off the corn

What a cool image.

radish will be had with baby spinach leaves

Baby Green beans will be a side dish.

There will be eggs from the hens and bacon in the deep freezer.

We will be centering our menu plans on the garden havest each day now.

I have some meat left in the freezer so that will be added to complete the meals.

This week shopping will be garden based.

This is living!