Saturday, December 31, 2011

On line home school, virtual corriculum

This was a wonderful morning to start a day with. Maple brown sugar muffins for all.

With the start of a new year comes a start of a new semester. Last semester Dash was here with me doing his online K12 5th grade. He passed with HONOR ROLL! Dove was at the Jr High her grades were good too. A's and B's mostly with one C. That one A in math was very hard won with a promise of being able to do an elective this next semester. She however was still not allowed to do one and has once again two math classes assigned. This is a class with another student tutoring her.

Dove came to me asking once again about K12. Once before we all but had the registration complete and her girl friend talked her out of it. This time she is VERY serious.  Dove will get some sound testing next week to get a proper base point to her math abilities. This will be so good to give her a nice strong foundation she does not have at this time. I showed her all about her duty and responsibilities if she stays home and she wants to do it. She was accepted and will begin on the second. To my amazement I am so HAPPY! We will be doing full time school the three of us at a good 5 hours a day. I will have added duty but added freedoms as well. We will look into the YWCA membership as we become able. This giving opportunity for extra alternative classes and exercise for all of us.

Once again I will be full time homeschooling both of my children. This thrills me. It is a lot of hard work and takes great patience to do. The added curriculum right at hand, books delivered gives a  wonderful ease to it. The best of both worlds for us. We will have the AIMS testing off site in the late spring.
Even with the hardships of the knee replacement we finished out this semester well. Now that I understand the process and know how to do all the tasks required for attendance and daily plans it will be a lot easier. I am so startled at how VERY happy I am.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

december update

The year has filled up and finished out with best friends in Jr High for Dove. Semester finals for both kids. Dash with his K12 home school distance computer classes we worked real hard. I say we for it is a good 5 hour job for me each day and then some. I suppose it need not be but we take education very seriously around here. They both finished off well, Dash had an extra three days of winter break.
This is my favorite coffee creamer and coffee gets me through may a long mornings around here. Insomnia is a mainstay with all the medications that are detoxed within four months four medication one was done twice. Pain a way of recovery for my knew knee and back issues. Naproxin in my 4th  week now to avoid injections in my spine. The steroids are not good for my immunity.
 Decorations were few this year for exhaustion have really left Steve and I as minimalist.
 Alas you know we must all get ready for that fat red man who brings us free stuff and steals all of our cookies. That is Doves description her humor is sweet but stands corrected with the heart of what Santa was all about.

 We had Dash's Adoption day number 10 on the 13th. It was a huge splurge but his heart to go out to a Carl's Jr fast food. Good grief what a rip off of ones cash. We just watched and rejoiced in his celebration. His heart mattered more.

A wreath at the door was all the welcome for the lights were too much this year. I know it is only four months out from my new leg but it seams an eternity. We are regaining strength. This break from teaching Dash is a refreshment to me. 
 Christmas Eve this dear one opened her home up till almost midnight with the laughter and conversations that covered the months apart. Our nieces spent time with our kids and the four of them were just delightful to behold. Our kids almost a whole generation younger were mesmerized by the evening with cousins.
Oh it was so so wonderful an evening!

 A photo shop game
 Dash slept on the sofa and morning came soon.
Once Willy had his bone we began our exchange. We were so grateful to the divine and human generosity of our provision.

 My darlin gave me a set of head phones that are cordless so as to be able to have music during the day while Dash is doing school. Oh the silence my son demands to concentrate. This is really sweet. I hope that the difference will keep me going on chores during the day. The lethargy has left my tasks so needy.

 This sweet man and I will be taking a partial early retirement to add to our income in March. We will work no less but it will be on his former employer of 27 years. It is really going to set us to a lower stress. Raising kids is expensive, us retiring on paper only years fly in life.

 Steve's brother took us all out to Christmas dinner. What a wonderful weekend is being had by all. Getting too tired to write more. Just needed to say...
Merry Christmas to one and all.

I stand amazed at the kindness that came and made this season turn around for us. It has strengthened our faith and built our humility and willingness to receive. We are refreshed.

On my IVIG my numbers are doing well, the infusions are working to keep me infection free. He will renew my strength one day I just know it.

Friday, December 16, 2011

Good for a laugh

Oh my my
This one just has to be shared. I know many of you would wish I shared more. Dash has now finished his mid term testing and I have two weeks off from teaching. Teaching is actually a good 5 hours a day.
Dove has three more days of school next week.

Returning from taking her to school this morning Dash spoke up
"I know what I wish I could get for Christmas..." he said. So my ears perk up to listen as my mind slows. Turning onto my street he continues. 
" I'd wish I could get a pooper scooper, but I'll wish for it for my birthday"
Laughing with great control as to not just bust out in a roar. He continues that it would be so much easier than  the shovel. 
Dash is very VERY sensitive to laughter so I am holding it in even now.

Mom I wish I had a pooper scooper

It has been a real intense time of teaching and healing of Dash's heart. He is learning study skills that help overcome all of the lies of the enemy of his soul. With Dove at 14 she is in constant need of all of me that is left over. These are very busy years for us. To sit here while the bread soaks for french toast is a treat for me in itself. We are well all of us that is a joy! I have deliveries this morning. Infusion is on the morrow they are a bit late delivering due to the season no doubt.
 A sweet way has been made for our Christmas to be a bit brighter for the kids. My heart is lifted being able to get them a couple of extra things. It is a wonderful thing to live with a grateful heart. Steve and I have been on a mission to renew our minds and one way is to speak of all that we are grateful for . If I were to wrap up all the things we have to find gratitude in we could not fit it all under even the White Houses' Christmas tree.

We are in love and that is the richest of treasures. Thirty years in March, that is just stunning to think how fast the years fly. Like a vapor, a sweet savor of all the spices life offers. Raising our kids and seeing them mature into young people with minds spirit and souls of their own. Oh we falter so but trust and pray and hope all the more.
I have to go make breakfast. With Dash home 24/7 I cook all three meals a day. He is a full time fullness of every moment save so very few. He is really coming along so well though and it leaves me humble and exhausted. The charter k12 is working out wonderfully.

Last night I took Dove and her best friend to the concert at the Jr High. It was a band concert. The jazz band is the only Arizona state one! They are going to Washington D.C.. They were great. The girls had a chaperoned escort, I hid out so as not to be present :). I really enjoy going to the school musicals. Poor mans symphony gives me a bit of culture. It is so good to have the exposure to the arts.

Well better get to cooking.
Enjoy your morning and be careful what you wish for. You might just end up cleaning the dung up.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011


A Tin of old beads

          Life was mundane back then for a child of nine or ten. I can smell the fuel as it wafted through the sliding glass door. After school and in the summer time my hours were filled with that smell of gasoline. I recall that it seamed everything smelled of it. There were times that it would even fascinate me to pick up the stock of candy bars and intermingled with the wonder of the chocolate was the diesel pungent a poison of memory. He is still in my mind sometimes standing above me like the character Poppy the Sailor Man, elbows skinny against the massive forearms that threatened me daily. That worn tired face of a man aged to be burdened with such daily labor. “Mucking the stalls’ of the car wash out back he would lift those massive grates and grasps the two handles of the post digger, those scoops of goo.
          He wore coveralls that are what the jump suits were called back then. He was naked underneath them except his ‘skivvies’ he called them. He was not a man to have pants and a shirt like other fathers. This man was my step dad. He adopted us three my sister brother and I when was only 6 years old. He was an old merchant mariner retired. They lost everything though in the move from Washington State to Utah. At least it seamed so. Mom got the job with the Flying J gas station. So early to rise and daily to the grind the two of them ran the service station on one of the main drags in Ogden Utah. That is where this story began.
           Each day the one or the other or most days both would be found there. Mother and Father absent the home, or rather the home exchanged to the smell of the service station. I remember the house but the days at the station seamed more. It was my sitter, my nanny as it were. Filling the soda in the cooler and counting the penny candy. For a dime one could have a bit of a field day. Candy bars were a quarter not much more and yet fewer choices then the penny candy. It was dusty cause it was kept at the bottom of the display where the children like me could sit on the dirty linoleum floor to count out the booty. Tootsie rolls, bit o’ honey those were some of my favorite. There were the tubes of candy coated cocoa all colors like jewels. I could just sit for hours and look at it. Often I did. For inventory would have to be held. I wonder even now if mom was just finding a way to keep me occupied, however I do recall the inventory late nights. I would be cold and tired. They had to keep me there until one or the other would ‘relieve’ the other to go home and fix supper. Then a plate would be left to warm. Very few meals had them both together. Sometimes the warm plate would be taken to the stall and we would sit and visit while the ‘on duty’ parent would eat a bite or two between customers.
          Oh the hours, the family extended became the regular customers. It was the way then that the customer was always right, this until they would walk away and we would speak of the annoyance. Many a day someone would be rubbing the top of my head kindly. Looking up to those warm smiles often were highlights that made me feel that I belonged to a greater circle of life. Some folks were downright creepy, but they were few. This was during the 1970’s when gas was less than fifty cents a gallon and that seemed high. Names like Nixon and words about war would buzz around my head. Current events were hashed and rehashed (spoken of over and over) all day long. This is I think where my interest in the world around me began. Wanting to be included in those conversations, wanting to understand what the fuss was all about.
           I was born in 1961, the last of a quiver full of kids mostly by different fathers. One even had a different mother. One of the eldest had a different biological mother and father. So the mix of mutts so we were called left me always a lesser citizen than most. So it seemed to me when the crisp suits came in. Those were the men who just pulled in to use the urinal and a fast “fill er’ up’ would ya? Those who had fine dresses and fancy hair in ribbons were like China dolls to be admired. My hair was a mess, cut of as to ease of care for a mother who had no time to care even for her own self. Mother who wore what was a weight of care upon her bones as a suit of obesity. Now there were others like me who knew that air of superiority. They were the Native Americans, mostly spoken ill of and expected to be intoxicated as if that were their lot. They were poor often as a white man might see it poor, but even I as a child saw a sort of wealth lost and over looked. I never saw color as a bad thing. I saw it in the eye. It was where I took stock of a person. Did they look me in my eye as a lesser? Did I see a pity that was not disdain, which is often how my dad looked at me? The best was when they were distracted but when they looked at me a natural smile would come over them as they liked what they saw in me. It made me feel beautiful they became beautiful too. That was the way the elder woman looked at me that day.
          I was sitting on the floor counting the penny candy. It was warm as I remember and the cool floor felt grimy but somehow refreshing on my legs. She was there her presence like a tangible kindness. I think I was admiring the colored balls of candy in the plastic wrapped tubes. Maybe it was the beads on her soft shoes and the tassels of leather that fringed the ankles but she saw my eye catch the colors. I smiled. A natural smile as when one finds deep pleasure and the depth of beauty becomes a pool. I just dove in unashamed and reached out to touch them. No words or few. Just soul to soul appreciation. It is not a memory of words spoken as it was of hearts melting in a flash an instant of time. Even now the memory is one of an Ora not so much actual recollection. I wanted to see her again. As it was with all of the customers a pattern emerges. On a particular day at a regular time almost expectantly they would return to fulfill the appointed lot. So one day she would return.
          ”I have something for you” her voice came to my ear, reaching out to me was her aged hand. It was so skilled hours were written upon it in ages of day. These were hands of use and purpose. Not like the China dolls hands they were for luxury. I wish I knew her name. It would be one like Mina or May. She was as a woman of sage, wise and knowing kind gentle even quit present within her own eyes to me. When she would look at mother or others she was sheltered withdrawal behind those walls of safety from the storm the onslaught of demeaning nuances left by slanted smirked judging faces. In her hand was an old tin can. Black painted worn with a lid that lifted off a good quarter of the way. Now it was only five inches tall perhaps two and a half inches around. It shook as a rattle muffled but musical in a way unlike any sound I knew of.        The old tin was cool to the touch and a little heavy for its size. Eagerly I watched as she showed me how to pull up the sliding lid. It might have once been full of baking powder when it was new. Once those containers really were made out of tin, not like the cardboard with plastic lids one finds now days. She must have painted it black or all the letters had long worn off. It showed the use I had that old tin for 40 years or more, now I think it gone forever.
In that tin was found treasure. To a child yet even this woman the treasure served for a life love of beading. It contained her long life of beading, for it was her scrap bead tin. Once before this generation that tosses everything into the trash bin, folks saved. We saved everything for ours were the parents who lived or better said survived the great depression. They learned hard lessons on the waste of the land and the effects there of. She had saved every one. Now these were very tiny beads called seed beads for just reason. The colors were as endless as the variety. These beads became the story of my life. Tossed away by others but never by a true artist a creator of beauty saved everyone. She saw the value in me as well for to me this Elder gifted such a treasure. Given to me with a knowing a soft face tanned with time into softness. Suede that made rough those weathered raw hides worn by my parents and most other people in my life. It was then that I hoped my face might stay soft as to my countenance. Time makes it hard to stay so. Trials often make lines look unkind.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Childhood in a flash a young lady

25   Vector Tree Branch / Christmas Tree  And 50+ Vector Trees Free Download

It is a wonderful cloudy day .

Along with the sunshine hiding behind the clouds is the passing of the summer desert heat. It will be a long time coming and with much delight brisk air will kiss my cheeks every morning as I drive Dove to Jr High. She is so beautiful now. Donning high heals for the first time my little girl begins her journey into becoming woman. Lady I tell her for any girl can become a woman but to become a lady is the goal.

 Today she has these shoes on, the black color block ones. They fit her! Well almost with a little wedge at the heal and a pad under her toes. The years a flash and a blur and after you wipe the fog from you eyes she is grown into a beautiful young lady.

Sometimes being a lady in a world of men and women is a hard thing. Boys and girls will make it a challenge too. Lady is a term of character to me. It is a supreme complement to a girl young or old. Seasons pass and the little girl in heals becomes a "lady" in training. Training began so long ago when toys and mommy's shoes were play things.


 Thanksgiving Day

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Mid Terms at 50!

Are you smarter than a fifth grader? I am wondering about how smart one must be. Dash is at Mid Terms and is doing great! I have learned or learned again so many things that I had forgotten. It takes a good 5 full hours of my day to see to Dash with his K12 on line public school. We are a pair doing well together after a very rocky start. Now that the road is smother it is a real pleasure. Math is the only subject posing a problem for now. Steve spends a good hour or so EVERY night doing the daily math lesson with him. He has real learning disabilities that are so challenging. It seems to be stress like related amnesia. At least I wonder about that. He forgets every thing he did the day before and every day it has to be retaught. Steve is a saint to do it.
Dove needs help too and she gets a lot less of it unfortunately. We are working hard to get her to speak up and ask. Balance is a real obvious effort each day. Dash may finish the first semester a few days early. With extra time earned he will get between one and four days extra off. We will see how the next two weeks go.

I am well, spent most days with little left to blog. Our design for the studio is wonderful. I love it! It is helping me to reconnect with my own heart. Been sorta wondering and just walking in a fog now for so long. Friday I will see the spine surgeon. The very thought of facing it is so overwhelming. The pain is so unbearable without the nerve and inflammation medications that they are now a must. I hope that it will be a non-surgical fix. I have just really emotionally gone flat line, too much to even think of. I love my new knee, due to my back I am not even able to walk around the block! Ooo that just makes me mad. I'll just keep my heart alive and focus on beauty in all that is around me and within me. I know I am blessed beyond measure. I think once the unknown clears as to my back, life will enter into direction. What ever the future holds knowing will help.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Choosing the best Turkey for the money

Good Morning
The butcher taught me a trick this morning. When choosing your turkey pick a hen not a tom. Look at the bird if it is more of a 'v' shape that one is the tom. If side by side the hen will have a wider curved appearance. The hen is more meat per pound. He said he can't tell everyone or he would be stuck with a lot of toms to sell off.
I got my bird for free to use later.

'Thankfully' I rest with the pleasure of family and friends.

May beauty wrap you up too and rest refresh you. Take time for the young ones as well as the elders. Laugh if you burn a biscuit or scorch a pot. Be silly and except the turkey and yourself just as you are. Perfection is found in the heart free of pretense. Remove all fear over concern what others might or might not think of you. You are beautiful. Your efforts a gift that I appreciate as I hope and trust those who receive them ought. Each little detail is seen. God sees it. Others might and neglect to speak it. When you notice them in others speak up.
Remember you can not read others minds so do not assume. They can not read yours so speak out.
Happy hearts of gratitude be calm. Remove the fret and enjoy the fruits of your labors.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

A different thanksgiving dinner

A very strange Thanksgiving this year for us. We are going out to a restaurant with the Grand Parents and My husbands Brother. They are serving the turkey and all the fixings. This year it is the best we can muster. Strange though not to even have this place decorated.

web sight for restaurant
I want to tap into some joy, some thankfulness.  I hope to play and laugh. Maybe I'll try to help and pull a few things down from the attic.

So very much to be thankful for. We have love, health and faith. Beauty surrounds us.

Hope your day is wonderful.

Friday, November 18, 2011

What have we been up too?

"He, who every morning plans the
transactions of the day, and follows that
plan carries a thread that will guide him
through a labyrinth of the most busy life"
- Victor Hugo

Each morning I am greeted by this little beauty. Usually to part her hair for her, or to put her eye shadow on. What an honor to do so. It is so sweet a time. This morning there was some expectancy for she has a crush on a boy in her class. A real nice kid who has brought a lot of laughter to her days. They sit near each other in several classed.
 One day this week I had a real scare. There was early out. I sat awaiting her and she was now where to be found. The staff at the Jr. High was wonderful. She had gotten a ride from a mom without my permission. The mom later apologized. Dove learned a good lesson and I gained a few gray hairs and a crown for forgiving the mom. That was really a dumb thing she did. So Dove knows now to go to the office if I am ever late for her.

 Dash is doing his K12 here at home distance learning. Today was art. Early American Indians. He is making a shirt example of the planes Indians. What a fuss and fit! His hand give him issues yet. The fine motor thing really hinders him (us) when he gets angry.
 This is the product of my efforts this week. It is still in flux. See the work that stack of filing might just take two hours to get done. However the filing cabinet is now ready to receive it. It had to get a transfer of the files and the drawers so the novels paper work will be at hand.
 This is the wonderful chair that Steve got me. This is the best comfort ever felt. IT matters to me because next week I have a MRI for my lower back. I think injections will be in order and hope that no surgery is called for. The stinosis is getting really bad in my lower back. The Doc put me on a pain medication of 100 mg of Lyrica and 100mg of Tramidol every 12 hours. The nerve pain in my legs is better and the butt pain is much calmer. Too easy to have a pain in my bum haha.
 We were able last week to replace the canopy on the garden gazebo. It went on real easily. It had been washed with a UV protectorate. With it wet still the fabric really relaxed. The other one was town up so bad. It was an embarrassment being as the neighbors are in two story houses.
 Last week end we also cleared the garage out. A full long bed truck load to the Goodwill. We had these and were able to put them on the Creigs listing for free. We still have the desk, but Steve will not have to lift those heavy things again. The two separate men were grateful for the free stuff.
 Those bags are full of Doves Sweet Streets house collection. She is going to try to sell it. Dash also got his Train set out and photos were taken to list it as well. Another job to do is to get that all set up. I am so busy it would just tire you out if I told you.
 The kitchen has been a big project for me. I want the island to keep clear and clean. BIG task here. So far a week has gone by with dishes done before bed and kitchen clean when I wake. OH how good it is to gain back my lifestyle after the months of letting it go so as not to go crazy. My strength is good when I sleep.
 My sweet SILove gave me the image of Steve and I as young lovers. It is in the center of the wall there. We need so to go get family photos done. For years we just have not had the budget. I plan to print some that we took. The family is so good to see up there where they belong. It is the ending of the household feng shui. The redecorating has taken a good 8 months to get this far. I love the main rooms now. Just the kids rooms are left to do.
 A mirror placed on the side of the refer really helps me handle to absence of that garden window. It is a real savings of utility to have the units in house. I do so miss the window.
Using the computer cart facing south is also an option to me. I do not like my back to the entry of the room however. The file cabinet and the printer is right there to do research for novel.
 Lots of work to do yet over here. It was fun to make Doves necklace and ear rings this morning. I am looking forward to getting back into jewelery making soon. I now can sit for a while. The new chair could even be pulled into service if sitting there.
 The light yet has to get shifted into place.
We will hide all the wiring up under the table by and by. Loads of little things like that to do.

Speaking of 'to do' My timer went off to go get Dove.
Enjoy your day as you can see my life is full and rich. Teaching five hours a day with Dash and then the other duties of home and heart. Not often a dull moment. OH but when sleep is gifted me all the things I can get accomplished make a happy heart.

Is your heart happy today? I do hope so. Read Psalm 91. I just been thinking about abiding and not just standing in the doorway of His shelter.

Monday, November 7, 2011

 Love has a way of pulling the corners into a smile.

Life with the passage of my fifth decade has called into thought the years yet to come. Questions asked has left me seeing that a new direction is at hand. The wonderful studio has been kept a sewing center for many years. Sewing is a skill and a talent practiced most of my adult life. With a Professional Seamstress for a sister, and a Mother in Love I have been greatly encouraged to pursue this art. An art, that is not for me, a passion. Rarely in my life has sewing really thrilled me like those things that set a fire. It has been warm never burning. So with great stillness my heart searched has reveled to me that it is a side hobbie and an industrial skill to help my family. Listening is a real act of love toward my heart.

Clutter is so stifling. Our garage has accumulated a large collection of unused items. In the passages of time all manner of once treasured things have now become a weight. We are going to continue to weed through things to lighten our load. The fabric in the bins is mostly from when my sister shut down her home to move out East. Her loss will get returned to her. That will open up those bins to store my own fabrics.

We moved the bike and now Dash has that window for his computer. Tucked in a nice snug space with windows to brighten his days. More images to come. This act of kindness really gave me wings to clear out stuff. My husband and I are so in love. His kindness overwhelms me. We had a chance to have a date yesterday. He insisted on getting me a new pillow. Mine disappeared, we think that one of the children took it to hold onto my scent. The woman at the store mentioned it. We remembered that years ago the kids needed a shirt or fabric I rubbed on myself to console them. It was the way we kept them calm. We are pretty sure that is what happened to it. The age that they are makes them embarrassed to admit it. That's alright, I now how that feels and how good it feels not being exposed.Very good trick for dogs too if your going away for a few days trip. We found good pillows finally at Dillards. Steve insisted on a GOOD down pillow. After last night the gratitude in seeing why he would not skimp on it wells within me. It actually silenced the cpap machine. The other pillow amplified it through the poly fiber.

Dash is doing much better, yesterday he was stressed over math. He felt bad about crying. Gently reminding him that he was tired and had had a full weekend helped. He is now giving word to feelings, much better.
It is so wonderful that the bike was not sold. It is used daily more than once.
It is raining here this early morning. Seven a.m., Steve's alarm went off and woke me. Felt good to get up even though little sleep met me last night.  It is a good day to be loved, to smile and dance. This morning will find me fetching a new leg brace for the left leg. I am so happy not to have to do the other total knee this year. I'll post more images as the studio progresses. It is slower going these days. That is one reason I really want to consider what it is I want to do with my days .

Thursday, November 3, 2011


Over and over and over today my montra has been
"change me, he is afraid of loss, everything is alright Dash, we can do it over, and so on. Give me a fish and I'll still need to learn how. Teach me how and I will be fed.
Last night we openly discussed ADD with the kids. We called it their wound, and spoke about how it makes them feel bad because they can not figure out why they act the way they do. It worked wonders!

Our Dear Dash came to each of us and said. "sorry I said all that about myself being a failure and hating myself" Oh music.

Dove and I washed her hair clean and I gave her a beauty bar. She is so dear pulling her out tonight over clean hair to look pretty. She is so into fictional characters. I hear little of reality. I few snippets here and there so I will try to have so open ended talks. So hard to know how to fish her out.

We are working hard to help re-establish safety.

 "can I do this?"

I can not change him, I can change me. I keep seeing my son in that crib screaming for food. I think of his story. Landing with us and in our first two months together; internal and external parasites throughout the family and dog three times. At six weeks home me having the radical hip to hip hysterectomy. Ripping my hand when falling as I protected his head from the floor. His needing to be medicated daily or the risk of dwarfism. Dove being left a bit in the dust as her own needs were delighted to others. Missing her attachment time with me.
So many many trials have left a wake of attachment stuff now surfacing after this straw of me missing for three weeks.
Yes it is said better than the future that might of been if they were left in orphanage. Now It must all be faced.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Attatchment Deficit Disorder

Mommie needs schooling. Sometimes it is so easy to forget about special needs in our kids. The nature of day in day out we all just become folks diving into life without thought.
Events of late show for us how devastating it can be when mom gets out of the game. Full time with the practice of intentional parenting and methods to help kids cope is full time. When nothing replaces that full time intentional focus things can fall apart.
Research came up with this that has reminded me of the cause fought the last 10 years for my son.

attachment support system Loads of information and several 13 minutes videos that gave a new focus

After just a few minutes of remembering his story calm came over me. Then once again a ' oh that explains it' came over me. Even now as he had issues with a lesson assessment, remembering his core of fear made for a calmer response by me. He retook the test and got a 100%. My son is really freaking out over a threat of loosing another mother. When I had surgery I was gone for 23 days. It really affected him hard. He also had to face his fear of literal starvation. He live his first 10 months in an orphanage in Russia. He had to do without a lot. The loss of food when he cried for it as a infant got mirrored when mom was in the nursing home rehab unavailable to cook for him. We are so finely knit. He was self wounded in the confusion of what was making him act so strange. Others just expected him to pull up his boots and fix himself something. It left a mark of feeling like a freak or failure because he was panicked. We forget that he has special needs.

The absence of kindness, when children believe a lie.

Being missing in action has left a tole on my family. Warm meals and clean sheets may not sound like much but it makes a real difference. Kindness in its absence leaves for survival. Yes as all who have said were right "they will get through it", but it took a tole here. My kids missed edification and the luxurious lifestyle of moms gifts of kindness. The clean, warm kindnesses offered by a present mother.
In the absence of kindness irritability grows, self sufficiency can become resented. It is now for me to heal the edges of resentment with patience that honestly I have not been able yet to pull up. Being worn out before 10 left me discouraged. Using as many tools as I can with Dash has left me to tears. He is with me 24/7, Dove is at Jr High.
Special needs kids have an extra layer to cover, to heal and peal back from my absence. Dealing with low self esteem left from an absence of being built up daily is a heroic challenge indeed. One I certainly feel ill equipped this morning to handle. Attachment Deficit Disorder is a hard special need to deal with. Dash being with me all day still needs to be at my hip constantly. I am not hardly able to go to the bathroom. I can sit here near him while he does his work and he is fine. Being so stressed I took to doing something about it. Here is what I have come up with that may help me this morning.
My son has hardened into a 'choice' to think he is a failure. Like an identity. We have done all we know to expose this as a lie, a choice to believe or not. We feel we may have failed him ourselves. For him to think of himself this way devastates me. It is based I think in the inability to accept that he is an imperfect human with an intolerably high IQ. It is not accepted by him if he does not do everything perfectly the first time. He is being taken to his knees in hopes all of this will help him find some humility and peace.
I really am taken into places of anger and frustration with him due to some poor parenting practices. Each kid is different to parent. Some kids are harder. This boy of mine is so amazing bur really stubborn. Being his home school coach is a full time job, it has left me wanting to be able to praise him more. He tosses any praise aside and disregards it. Lord I need wisdom and I need health for the strength to do this all better. It is so hard. I feel worn out at times not wanting to fight or yell at him ever again. So I will do my best to avoid the traps. I am a parent who has made mistakes and now I need to keep learning how to do it better. My habit of trying to encourage him when he is angry has to stop. He can not hear it and it just makes me escalate into frustration.

At the moment we have a honeymoon stage. Oh it is just so exhausting. I am not speaking with him as I am typing so he is now singing Christmas song and talking well chattering with the dog. As his coach with school I have to work so hard to praise as I correct. Hard work.

1. Don’t yell or challenge your child when he’s angry.
Many times parents deal with angry outbursts by challenging their kids and yelling back. But this will just increase your feeling of being out of control. The best thing you can do is remain calm in a crisis. Think of it this way: Even if you get into a car accident and the other driver jumps out and is furious at you, if you can remain calm, they will probably start to relax and be reasonable. But if you come back at them with an aggressive response, and say, “What are you talking about, that was your fault,” the tension just stays at that heightened place. So don’t challenge your child when he’s angry—that’s just like throwing a match onto a pile of firecrackers. Just wait until he calms down.

2. Don’t try to reason with your child when he’s in the middle of a tantrum, tirade or angry outburst. ME!
Many parents I talk to fall back on logic when their kids are angry. After all, as adults, we reason through things to defuse tense situations. This is always a challenge with kids because they don’t have the same capacity to stop and reason like we do. So when you’re dealing with your angry child, you have to leave that verbal place where you feel pretty comfortable and use different techniques. Saying, “Why are you mad at me? You were the one who forgot your homework at school,” will only make your child angrier. Instead, wait until he calms down and then talk it through later.
3. Pay attention to your physical reactions.
It’s important to watch your physical reactions because your senses will tell you “Yikes, I’m in the presence of somebody who is very upset.” You’ll feel your heart start beating faster because your adrenaline will be heightened. Even though it’s difficult, the trick is to act against that in some way and try to stay calm. Remember, you’re lending your children your strength in these moments; you’re showing them how to handle anger.  By staying calm, you’re not challenging your child by yelling back and engaging in a power struggle; this only escalates the tension. And paying attention to your own reactions will also help your child pay attention to himself because he won’t need to worry about you or your emotions. When you don’t respond calmly, your child will work even harder at his tantrum to try to get you to pay attention.  So you really have to tap into some solid parenting skills to handle the outburst quickly and effectively.
4. Don’t get physical with your child.
Sometimes on the Parental Support Line we hear from parents who have lost it and gotten physical with their kids. I took a call from a dad whose teenage son mouthed off to his mom, and the father shoved him. The fight escalated. The son would not speak to his father because he felt his dad should apologize to him; the father, on the other hand, felt that his son caused the problem and worried that his authority would diminish if he apologized. I advised him to say, “I lost control and it was wrong for me to shove you. I apologize.” That’s it; end of story. You don’t go into your child’s role in that situation at all because it is an attempt to place the blame on someone else for your actions. Rather, you want to teach your child how to take responsibility and make a genuine apology. Don’t worry—you will have other opportunities to work with your child around being mouthy or defiant. But it’s important to be a good role model and address your role in the fight going south. Remember, if you get physical with your child, among other things, you’re just teaching him to solve his problems with aggression.

5. Take a different approach with younger kids.
If your small child (eighteen months to age four) is in the midst of a temper tantrum, you want to move ever so slightly away from him, but don’t isolate him completely. When small kids are upset, you want to help them to start to learn that they can have a role in calming themselves down. You can say, “I wish I could help you calm yourself down. Maybe you can lie on the couch for a little bit.” So have them calm down until they feel in control. By doing that you’re asking them to pay attention to themselves. So instead of, “You have to sit there for ten minutes by yourself,” it’s more of, “When you feel better and you’re not upset anymore, you can come on out and join us.” You can also give them a choice. You can say, “Do you need time to go into your room and get it together?” Again, don’t challenge them when they’re in that mode.
6. Don’t freeze up.  
Some parents freeze up when their kids throw tantrums or start screaming at them. The parent is emotionally overwhelmed and becomes paralyzed with indecision or gives in to the child. If you’re this type of person, you may find that sometimes your child will get angry on purpose to engage you; they’ll bait you by throwing a fit or saying something rude, because they know that this will cause you to give in. So your job is to not take the bait—don’t get angry, and don’t give in.
I think parents sometimes have a tendency to renegotiate with their child in these situations. Often, they’re having a hard time managing their own emotions and so they don’t know how to coach their child properly in that moment. But remember, if you give in and renegotiate, even every once in a while, you’re teaching your child that it’s worth it to act out.  Instead, let them calm down and try to coach them to use their problem-solving skills later. In my opinion, once you start doing that, you’re not passive. You are making a conscious choice to not get into an argument. You’re saying, “I’m not going to renegotiate; I’m going to be calm.” Although it may not seem like it on the surface, all of those choices are actions—you are making a choice not to give in.

7. Give consequences for the bad behavior, not for the anger.
When your child throws a tantrum, starts screaming and really loses it, make sure you give him consequences based on his behavior and not on his emotions. For example, if your child calls you a foul name during his angry outburst, give him a consequence later for that infraction of the rules. But if all he does is stomp into his room and yell about how life isn’t fair, I would let that go. Kids get angry just like we do; they need to feel that they have a safe place to let off steam. As long as they’re not breaking any rules, I think you should allow them to have that time to be angry.

8. Don’t give overly harsh punishments.
Giving harsh punishments in the heat of the moment is a losing proposition. Here’s why: Let’s say your child is angry. He’s having a tantrum and shouting and screaming at you. You keep saying, “If you don’t get it together, I’m going to take away your Wii for a week. Okay now it’s two weeks. Now it’s a month…do you want to keep going?” But to your dismay, your child keeps escalating; the more you try to punish him in order to force him to stop and get control of himself, the worse he gets.
We have a name for that kind of discipline: It’s called “consequence stacking.” What’s really happening here is that the parent is losing emotional control. I understand that it is hard to tolerate it when your kid is upset—we don’t like it. But what you want to try to ask yourself is, “What do I want my child to learn?” And the answer might be, “I want him to learn how to not throw a fit every time he has to do something he doesn’t want to do. I want him to learn that when he gets upset, there’s an appropriate way to get out of it.” The worst thing you can do is join him and get upset yourself. Harsh punishments that seem never-ending to your child are not effective, and will only make him angrier in that moment.
9. Take a break.
On the Support Line, I’ll often ask parents who call about their child’s angry outbursts the following question: “When you and your spouse are mad at each other, what do you do to calm down?” Often, people will say they take a break and do something on their own for a little while until they can calm down and talk it through. This technique also works with your child, but parents often don’t think of it because they feel they should have control over their kids. But remember, when somebody is angry, you can’t reason with them and you can’t rush it. The bottom line is that if you stay there in that anger and keep engaging each other, it will not go away—it will just get bigger.  So take a break and come back and interact with each other later when everyone is calm.
10. Role model appropriate responses when you’re angry.
I also tell parents they should try to role model dealing with their own anger appropriately in front of their children. What are some good ways to do that? Say, “I’m getting frustrated—I’m going to take a break.” or “I can’t talk to you right now; I’m really upset so I’m going to wait until I’m calm. I’m going to come back and we’ll talk later.”
Admitting that you’re angry and you need some time to calm down is not a weakness; it takes a lot of strength to say these words out loud. Remember, you’re teaching the lesson of how to manage your anger, and that’s exactly what you want your child to learn.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Taking back my ground

It has been a long while that my ground had to be release to tenets of sorts.
Children with sticky fingers doing a good job of heating up something to eat for them self. Family members simply grazing as my hands were thoughtfully tucked under my seat as I did my time to heal.

Beginning in  early June when my knee finally blew out until now a lot has happened to my beloved kitchen. It has endured all sorts of suffering spills and mishaps.It has survived a shell of itself a calamity of mixed up storage and lost gadgets utensils and bowels. We may never find all the missing teaspoons. We searched for our giant stainless steel bowl last night. Tonight it was discovered in with the cookie sheets invisible. Only due to putting a baking pan away did it jam the space and announce itself. We have just been puzzled, how do you loose a huge bowl like that? Well one mystery solved many more to come. Where is the meat thermometer is what I need to know.

Tonight two hours with lap top on the island dishes were washed and the reality of abandonment reviled itself.
The bread counter under the big mixer was literally 1/8 th inch dust! Yep It missed me. It missed the warmth of my presence,the smell of fresh foods. It missed kindness being fashioned through ingredient mixed with thoughts of others. It was each man for himself. Never mind the mess and just do your best avoidance of starvation. An inventory of the cold units and a pantry overview got through my hands into my heart today.

Momma's getting back in the kitchen. Let the kindness of warm thoughts pour through the mixing cup and over the edge of the bowl. Survival days come done now time to thrive. It is the love, kindness of expressed bounty coming back to this old house uncommon.  These days of fend for yourself commonality not only need be over but Lord has mercy on me and mine they are coming to an end.

Meal Plan Menu Monday was a good tool. I'll shop for the little things to fill in the dishes. Doing what I can do.  The nerve pain medication has been reintroduced. It is a very expensive one called Lyrica the co-pay was $50 without it it would of been $375.!, Tramadol is not very effective for the issues of nerve healing. It helped a lot with arthritis before. This is the second day I had sleep. Yesterday I did a little light gardening. Planted the annuals in the front yard cottage bed. The pots on the porch have a few seedlings. Caused more pain than I had bargained for but my heart was sure filled.  The infusion last Tuesday has pumped up my strength. My numbers are looking real good. My strength is a battle yet, getting older too. Had a realization that I am not a 30 year old mom any more. Nor was I ever, Dove came home when I was 36. I think I may be beginning to naturally slow down. Hard to accept but walking against the hard wind is more a test than one might think. This and the anastesia (sp) getting out of my system, perhaps.

If any of you are there I love you.
Lisa B. I think of you and want to reach out a hug. I hope you have a wonderful day tomorrow.

Do any of you feel that age slows us down some? Turning 50 and raising a family is real physical. If your doing so is it showing in your adventure? How about you 50 year olds who are with grand kids do you feel it differently? Share your thoughts on it. Anyone my age raising kids/grand kids of 10 and14?

"In the confrontation between the stream
and the rock, the stream always wins
- not by strength but by perseverance."
- H. Jackson Brown


Sally's Fabrics is closing

Another sewing center is coming to an end. So many of our stores have closed now. Sewing is a dieing art slowing the wheel of do it yourself. Once that wheel stops it will become an elite hobby. One that will be afforded by those with high end budgets.
If you live in the area you might just think to add some staples to your supplies.

netting for dish scrubbers
transfer paper
It is like a sale for your pantry. Just call it being supplied. Now there may not be a lot of competition for the hard times are upon so many. 

Remember Christmas is coming all you who sew on and on.
1235 East Main Street (Main & Stapley)
Mesa, AZ 85203

 After over 40 years in business Sally's Fabrics is being forced to close its doors.  It is definitely not what we wanted, as we love all our customers and have enjoyed working with all of you, but we have no other options.  As a result of this close we will be putting the entire store on sale.   The official close of business will be December 3rd.
We thank all of our employees and customers for their support over the years and are very sad to see the store go.

Beginning October 31, 2011 the ENTIRE store will be on sale (excluding machines) for 25%
We will be closing at 5pm on 10/31
As of that date all VIP accumulations will cease.
No Gift cards will be issued.
There will be no holds on any fabric at all.
We will continue to service machines up to the last week of November.  Any machines not picked up by December 3rd will be donated unless there has been arrangements made to pick them up the week of Dec. 5-9.  After that the doors will be locked and the building vacant. 
We will make every effort to contact as many people as we can to insure that this does not happen. 
Kaye will continue to take business and service machines. 
If you would like to continue business with her please send an email to
I will forward your info to Kaye for her database.
If you have any concerns about your Pfaff machines that you have purchased from us please understand that Pfaff continues to provide warranties through the nearest Pfaff dealer.  After we are closed your Pfaff Dealer for this territory would be Mulqueen's.
As for education information on machines our instructor Carol will be continuing to teach one on one and she will be taking over our Adults You Can Make It classes.  If you need her contact info please send an email to
If you are interested in Quilting by Lisa you may email her at
For comments, concerns and questions you may continue to email us at  We will try to address any of your issues as quickly and accurately as possible. 
Thank you again for your long standing support of Sally's Fabrics.  It has been a wonderful adventure!

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Uncle Dale Passed on this week.

Our Dear Uncle Dale passed away this week. His funeral is on Wednesday. Here are the details.

 Steve's mom Wrote

They plan to show at the funeral some of the video Steve made.  Last night all his kids looked at the video together seeing the whole thing.  They thank Steve for that.  They loved it. It is coming in handy, especially about the part where Dale is singing some of those songs.   It will be a short service and then outside they will have some cookies or something, no lunch, and then we are off to the Veteran's Cemetery out on Cave Creek Road for the burial and a veterans service there.  It will be a tight time squeeze because the Veteran's Cemetery wants it to be done by 2 pm. because the workers all go home soon after. There will be no procession out there.  We all get there on our own. They will provide us with maps I think. 
When Carol Jean (Dales Wife) died in 2006 arrangements were made with Dale's help at that time.  These are his wishes for his funeral.  He said he wanted to be buried at the Veteran's Cemetery.   I think Dale was in the National Guard for a time.  His obit will be in tomorrow's paper.
He was the middle son of three brothers. His elder brother being Steve's Father. Married to but one woman all of his days and raised a family. She passed and he was just never the same. He just set himself to give up and had a slow demise through determination.
I have searched for thirty minutes and cannot find his image.

My sweet boy is pretty freaked about going to a funeral so I will have to make sure to take the time to help him process. The clothing must be readied and set aside this morning for with this being infusion day my energy is limited.
Today is infusion for me. We are so tired for sleep is a battle due to leg/breathing issues at night. My husband deserves a huge award.  He endures so lovingly, trying for solutions. I am so fed up with not being able to sleep. Restless Leg cramping and bone pain are still battling me (us) for pillow time. My husband is so dear we do all we can think of to try to fix the hindrances. We changed linens and replaced with some that were stored. They kept the smell of the plastic storage box and so will need AGAIN to be changed for they are setting off asthma. Those opportunists to try to behave. My goodness I am a little bratty when I am struggling with sleep deprivation, well more than a little. The man is really really patient and loving. I am so blessed to get so much loving support in all of the things I go through.  I hope I never have to do without his love and presence. Yet even so I think I would fight to live. I hope I would fight for life.

Today...fight for your life. Live it to it's top!

Friday, October 21, 2011


This was sent to me, I am forwarding it because it does touch a nerve in me.. 

This is another example
"TREASON in high places" !!!

Get angry and pass this on!

Remember, not only did you contribute to Social Security but your employer did too. It totaled 15% of your income before taxes. If you averaged only $30K over your working life, that's close to $220,500.

If you calculate the future value of $4,500 per year (yours & your employer's contribution) at a simple 5% (less than what the govt. pays on the money that it borrows), after 49 years of working you'd have $892,919.98.

If you took out only 3% per year, you'd receive $26,787.60 per year and it would last better than 30 years (until you're 95 if you retire at age 65) and that's with no interest paid on that final amount on deposit! If you bought an annuity and it paid 4% per year, you'd have a lifetime income of $2,976.40 per month.

The folks in Washington have pulled off a bigger Ponzi scheme than Bernie Madhoff ever had.

Entitlement my a--, I paid cash for my social security insurance!!!! Just because they borrowed the money, doesn't make my benefits some kind of charity or handout!!

Congressional benefits ---- free healthcare, outrageous retirement packages, 67 paid holidays, three weeks paid vacation, unlimited paid sick days, now that's welfare, and they have the nerve to call my social security retirement entitlements?

We're "broke" and can't help our own Seniors, Veterans, Orphans, Homeless

In the last months we have provided aid to Haiti , Chile , and Turkey . And now Pakistan ......home of bin Laden. Literally, BILLIONS of DOLLARS!!!

Our retired seniors living on a 'fixed income' receive no aid nor do they get any breaks while our government and religious organizations pour Hundreds of Billions of $$$$$$'s and Tons of Food to Foreign Countries!

They call Social Security and Medicare an entitlement even though most of us have been paying for it all our working lives and now when it�s time for us to collect, the government is running out of money. Why did the government borrow from it in the first place? Imagine if the *GOVERNMENT* gave 'US' the same support they give to other countries.

Sad isn't it?

99% of people won't have the guts to forward this.

I'm one of the 1% -- I Just Did.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

standing tall on both legs

This has been a day full of wonderful news!
It is determined that my left new will NOT need the total knee replacement we suspected. The even leg stature that the right knee replacement gave has stabilize my other knee so that the space, the margin of the meniscus is level and equal (no bone on bone now) it is good for another five years or so now!

Oh this is so good for December was targeted to have the left knee done just after Christmas. OH YA! nothing to dread. I'll have the brace made for it for long walks or hikes

I will be able also to keep my infusion nurse. Now that has been another fiasco. The nursing Company she worked under was sold. Sold to some very shady folks who even wanted my nurse to forge a test on a medical devise. They went so far as to email her a test form all filled out to sign. She refused. Then they denied her her due pay as a specialist so she finally quit them. We have worked through the specialty pharmacist to get another agency so I could keep her. Meanwhile the company sent me a completely filled out DNR= do not resuscitate. I refused to sign it of course. With a barking dog, on a Sunday just two hours after my nurse had called me came in another phone call. It was the woman from the agency tattling on my nurse telling me she had resigned. She was all about finding out if I had been informed by my nurse so they could punish her if she informed me. The level of immaturity was startling! These are the same folks who refused my Occupational Eval at home when my insurance ordered it. I told her I No longer would do any business with the agency.

What a wonderful thing to learn My Ashly would be here for me on Tuesday. God is so good.
My Doctor learned of all of this and called the Specialty Pharmacy that subcontracts the nurses, that finally got the action. This is the strange thing. Ashly is hired on (I am her only private patient she works full time as a wound care specialist at the hospital) by the woman who sold the other company That her mother.

Ashly does not consider her once a month 6 hours with me work. She enjoys our time together.

After speaking with the mother who was kept out of any of our conversations reason given. Conflict of interest or the appearance of. Strange world. This Mother of Ashly my nurse sees me as a second mother to her daughter! They both fought to make sure that I was not left without the best of care. They did this so very professionally too. So the mother and I had a long loving conversation. She expressed exceedingly high admiration of me personally for all of the interactions between myself and Ashly over the last year or so of infusions. Ashley thought so much of me that at one time during the CVID conference in May she asked her mother to come and secretively meet me. They did not let on that they were mother daughter.

Now if I were, as I can be at times, a suspicious woman it would all seem a bit too good to be true of innocence. I have worked with the amazingly kind generous Ashly. She sits six hours a month to do the infusions. She is a sweet woman who truly cares for me. Even so it is sorta weird and lifts a tiny red flag.

Steve's last project took off without a hitch. Big news for us and for our good fortune employment wise.

I am off of the Narco medication and feeling better. Yesterday I had a low grade fever so we have a little caution here with the infusion being a 5 week'er.

Another cool thing is that I climbed stairs today at therapy. A flight of 15 or so up and down three times. OH FREEDOM! Steve helped me overcome fear yesterday and I was able to get down on the floor to do my exercises and get up all right. Now by climbing I mean no stop in the middle of each step. This was left right left right each a new step.

I am loving my new set up. This keyboard is so nice to use.

I will be seeing a spinal specialist to get some help with the stinosis in my back soon. Just for advise not really willing to do injections yet or especially no surgery. Just need some help with the pain and to keep watch on any progression of the narrowing of the column. The knee surgeon gave me a referral. The therapist said that they are the best of the best and that they are not knife happy. The therapist encouraged me just to go learn.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

It's like ripe fruit falling softly off the tree.

Everything comes to harvest. Morning found me rested a full seven hours! That is nine weeks out on a limb (leg in my case ha) of recovery, pain medication, bla bla bla. Today was day two of a Narco (morphine based pain medication) free life, rested and low pain interference. This 'Apple' shined.  My morning was crisp with fresh zest. A totally awesome experience.
Dash got me up only 20 minutes before Dove needed to be driven to school.
How's that harvest ? I wake up late to find my 14 year old (special needs kid) fully dressed, fed and homework done. She was ready to go to school. Only too happy, excited even, to go to school, loving life.
Mercy like an orchard of organics thriving in the fall sunshine.
After Dash and I dropped her off we stopped to get supper groceries. He like a tree shades me with kindness only more than decidedly helpful. Inquisitive, thoughtful and full of ideas and questions. Fertile soil his soul ever set to be 'son' to his mother adored, appreciated and admired.
Life in the good earth.
Dove attended therapy with me for Daddy Man has to do extra hours at work. She was not happy at first, it turned around Bless God! There were two other kids in therapy! The room that normally has sports blasting was set to the Disney channel. Dove really likes a show called 'Shake it up'. She identifies with a studious girl who loves to learn and dance. Call these apples GALA!
My therapist came out with See's suckers and passed them out to the kids. Dove even threw her arms out in copy of a happy moment of her best character. Then she was all pleased, pleasant and smiles. Delighted that I took her. Daddy Man met us there for the cars low fuel forced me to take her on with me. Dear man gave me the gentle push through my fear and I was able to drive the truck for the first time today. Nothing like climbing trees ( tall truck) in the evening hour.
Morning shop made for a wonderful BBQ in the $20 yard sale gas grill. All be it the leaves (chicken and the corn husks) were a blaze almost caught the porch a fire (not really) Dash was sure fast with the fire extinguishment (his word coined) oops...Note to self turn burners back down low. This is my first gas grill. I found it just before surgery and this is just the second time I used it.
Well the end of day here after returning from a 15 mile trip up the freeway to drop off the walker for an Elder on limited  income. She was well recovering from near death turned amazing mercy. The silence was a walk in the woods and gave way to solutions for tomorrows challenges to come.

Makes me want caramel or to go bobbing for apples seeing all this fun and all for just that lovely seven hours of sleep. The hard months past left ripe fruit here in this life uncommon. They say that it takes a good cold snap to create the best fruit. I see that the time of independence forced on the kids have grown great branches of good character and self reliance little else can form except those cold winds of hard season.

It is harvest time.
A time of plenty of love, well being and good days ahead.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Latex allergy to the heating pad

Oh BIG arg! the most wonderful thing in the whole of the world right now is heat therapy. By one a.m. too tired to sit up any longer I wrapped my leg in heat to sleep. Only to awake to asthma, rather to my husband waking me telling me I was not breathing well. It was the pad it smelled like a latex balloon. It is just everywhere. Having a latex allergy is a mysterious saboteur of many a good thing. Alas 3a.m. till 4 a.m. was in a tub of hot water. When they say bad restless leg they really mean it. Heat is good but latex forced my hand to try to find another solution.
I'll close the tub awaits another tour of, 'heat those legs to calm'.

Enjoy your day it is a gift

Total Knee replacement it is time to detox off of the Narco

For nine weeks now I have used a strong pain medication to help through the knee replacement. It is time to stop. This is a time for side effects and solutions. Many of the side effects are really surprising to me. Intense restless leg cramps...go figure. So I will increase my calcium, magnesium and potassium. Flu symptoms, well I had my flu shot on Friday last. Now I know where the diarrhea came from, yep another one of those detox issues. If not better I will get some Imodium AD. No appetite and No sleep to come easily. Exercise around the block will help sleep as it did last night. Tonight is the first all stop of the Narco.
All day I have used Advil/Tylenol staggered every other dose. It is helping the pain some. Here we go on day one.
Heat pad for my leg is wonderful. For another side effect is really bad cramping and joint pain. Go figure, that is a double edged sword.
My surgeon asked me if I had set a detox plan in place. Now they said nothing of this until I was almost out of the very pain medication that makes therapy a possibility. He telling me it is time set detox research into motion. I have read about the Valerian root for anxiety, another side effect. The use of Benidrill for insomnia but that really messes me up. So I sit here.
My sweet husband set all aside to prioritize my comfort. He also set up a place for me to be as comfortable as I could imagine. We actually purchased a chair today and a nice cart for this laptop. The way that it fits my back is so supportive. The cart has a raised base and serves as a stool to raise my feet. This chair leans back and the keyboard on my lap removes the pressure points so painful on my thigh. My inlaws have also gifted us with a chair they retired and we will replace Dash's school chair with that. This is a wireless keyboard that I am typing on and it is so wonderful. It was so hard to think of spending but how grateful I am at his insistence. I can type here again .There is also a wireless mouse. 
My back had been a bit deformed and with some stynosis well sitting to type was just too painful. It has been for some time now. We have addressed all ease to remove those things that pain me. No pain no need for pain medication. Some preventative efforts and investments.
 We found a 24x12 heating pad that fits my leg. This is the first time I have been able to sit for more than a few moments without really incurring substantial pain.

Older women likewise teach the younger women...

• how to love their husbands
• how to love their children
• how to be self-controlled
• how to be pure
• how to be keepers at home
• how to be kind and submissive (not subservient) to their own husbands. (See Titus 2:3-5)

Blog Archive

By Maya Angelou

'A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ
That a man should have to seek Him first to find her.'

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not shouting 'I'm clean living,'
I'm whispering 'I was lost, Now I'm found and forgiven.'

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.

When I say.. 'I am a Christian' I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible, but God believes I am worth it.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I still feel the sting of pain...
I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner Who received God's good grace, somehow!

Words have power. Here are a few of my favorite sayings.

  • A warm cup of tea is like a cuddle with a friend.
  • The North American Indians have a more eloquent word for ‘friend’ than we do in English. In their language, the word for friend literally means, “the one who carries my sorrows on his back.”
  • Return with Honor
  • The sage anticipates things that are difficult while they are easy, and does things that would become great while they are small. All difficult things in the world are sure to arise from a previous state in which they were easy, and all great things from one in which they were small. Therefore the sage, while he never does what is great, is able on that account to accomplish the greatest things."
  • “Live so that when your children hear these words they think of you… Fairness Caring Integrity Honesty Love Trust.”
  • "O Lord help my words to be gracious and tender today, for tomarrow I may have to eat them."
  • "No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes"

Click here for all crafts

e patterns My sister told me of this site

Please pray for her parents and family

Please pray for her parents and family
Amy has clicked her heals and flown to her real home. There is no place like home.

This was given to me for the third time in just a few weeks.

Zephaniah 3:17 NLT
"For the LORD your God has arrived to live among you. He is a mighty savior. He will rejoice over you with great gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will exult over you by singing a happy song."

Thank You Ross

Getting to know Me

What warm hearts you all offer

Thank you all for the kindness you have shown me with every Award. I am embraced. You Are a blessing.

Thank you Michelle

Thank you Michelle

Thank you Annette they are beautiful
Thank You Annette
Autism Awareness