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Ya know Humility is an amazing thing. As angry and seemingly justified as I felt I have been shown a higher value.
To give the example of fearlessness in a foreign world matters more than to teach the fear of exploring it. Anything left unexplored just might be those things left ignorant and vulnerable to exploitation. Teaching fear exploits the very core of KNOWING WHY we believe what we believe. Slippery slippery slope. Fine line between instilling fear and calling it a moral ground, or extinguishing that very fear with the truth of who we are in Christ.
WE have nothing to fear except that very fear our enemy would just love to cripple us up with. I can still take a moral stand for what I believe in but just need to do it through the proper channels. I also need to check my moral code too. Is it become based in fear of upsetting God or in Love and reverence toward him. Fear of Gods retribution or removal of cover if I err is a lousy lie that is hindering my parenting and my kids from a powerful childhood. One where they can stand in the strength of who is within them and who they are in him.
Lord Lord to articulate this one...
The children matured me this morning by showing me the desperation of a life of fear. Namely mine.
Who do I trust more God to protect them or the enemy to do them harm?
Once I was like that, fearless.
I told them of a life story where I stood up to injustice.
Now I stand up to evil by instilling fear in my young ones?
I must rather teach by the example of fearlessness. Express my convictions do my best to explain them. My kids showed such great character today.
Dove was heard saying "I can't wait till I am 18 and get out of here"...
My reaction as apposed to action caused her to long for freedom. My example ought be one that instills the truth of her freedom in Christ to "become" Godly by her free choice.
Rather it is for me to draw her to the honey comb. Steve had an Uncle who drove his kids from it. Lives full of bitterness and blame against God. It was the mans RELIGION that pushed his kids away from God and to resent God. It was a false representation of God. One of fear.
It will be my relationship with God rather that will draw them to HIM. Oh I have not lost that childhood tenacity to fight for what is right. Just got to study the right way and reasons for doing so.
I love a good fight
am I fighting to make a change
or to punish?
Part of me would just love to punish those who put that garbage out there to hinder youth. Know I was hindered by it. I will fight to make a change. Teach them to fight for what is right. This motive to punish blinded me to the fact that I was making an assumption about what Dove believed.
I was Wr...wrr...wrong!
I search for a solve so desperately that I assigned fault to this where perhaps the target is to empower her into who she is in Christ.
Tricky snake to slither in and divide to conquer using his very own fodder against me. Leaving it looking as if I am so valid to take a stand against a foe, rather that to stand up for empowering her in Christ. Too many weak Christian kids.
My kids walked to the corner buss stop feeling fearless and free to stand today for the first time.
Had no idea that living room battle would turn out grabbing a snake by the tail that wanted me to hold on to it. I toss it out to crush it underfoot, dirty little bugger.
Genesis 3:15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.
I went into the MD for a follow up. She gave me another injection of antibiotics. I am finally getting able this afternoon to hold water and food down. This viral turned into a sinus infection. The shot today really helped me, thank God for it. I am ready to get over this.