Neil Armstrong Cake

Well with the decorations up, and the table

cloth created, Solar System Crayon, Use craft bond to save the confetti fom being all over your house. It also leaves a slightly sticky residue that holds the place cards and plates in place.

For the Frosting I use a simply butter cream 1/2 pound real sweet butter, powdered sugar incorporated with raspberry flavoring and (I use) soy milk.
If you place all eggs and oil into a 4 C. measuring cup your shells are gone and the mess is reduced, the same measuring cup is then used for the water. Less mess and dishes.
Spray your cake pan, and I used sugar to dust , If you add the dusting sugar and tap it around the pan OVER THE SINK no mess to clean( You gotta rence your sink out anyway) efficiency is a kin to invention.
Over filling pan is important, an edged cookie sheet is under the cake in the oven , this one did not over flow but it is a good time saver if it would have. I keep kabob's skures to check my cakes.

As our model displays the cake is very high in the pan and when the cake is leveled the pan remains full to the brim. Now a sunken middle that is the culprit often when an inverted cake cracks on you. A board is covered with foil. (butter cream is oily if you do not cover or use a paper doily it can spoil it).
I keep my cake decorating tools and supplies in a (right Hand ) drawer at my close to work surface. I will be getting into it a lot during the process getting out my tips and such. A tip container can easily be upset., so I so not remove the case from the drawer. I have my colors , calers, bages skures , brushes any thing that is small and cake making in nature.

Our model displays the joyful preparation of coloring our frosting, all colors are mixed prior to decorations commencement. (the joy is tasting the frosting!)
With Frosting room temperature. we begin. I use an open bag no tip to lay down frosting.
After laying it down and smoothing it out. I let it cure a little and then I use a free form and gently press and smooth it to shape.
Same principle with the black mask, once it set a little I smoothed it out. I them added soy milk to the frosting and used a food paint prush to add a high light of reflection to the mask.
I always have an image to work from.
I washed the toys in hot soapy water.Useing a little of the frosting I affixed the little guys to the board around the cake.

Mission Controll,Launch Succesful!

Neil Armstrong, Get ready were gonna eat your heart out.
I'll post on the cake I made tomorrow.















"t" 20 minutes all system ready!
Lets blast this Party off ! Table set, Cake secure all members in place.
Huston it a "go" "go""go!!!!"
A new pocket comb!


Ignition! all members "GO" "GO" "GO"

Reading and Happy! Hand wrought stuffed octopus
Spanish lesson via a birthday card..






Becca had a wish to "catch the rainblow" On our rides home from the city I often will let them have a treat from the junk machime. She always chooses scittles candy. One day she told me she wished she could catch the rainbow. I gave this a major priority. Each person at the party, including the two other Moms, all had a turn.
We also made rockets out of tubes and had a time to place a adhesive "foamie" with a signed name on it on her missile picture. She did not want to have any competition at her party so all feeling would be pleasant for each of her guest,
My kids were so sweet we had had long talks about decorum and how it was important to make the guest the most important persons at your party , that it was good form to enjoy them first before cake and presents. We had an altered experience and went with the flow, one of our guests may have had to depart quickly, that meant 4 would have to leave just as they had arrived. Thinking about the lesson, the cake came moments later followed by gifts before activities, but then after a phone call the disturbance in plans was found to be uncalled for. I continued by the seat of my pants a little be fettled in thought of the order of events but the flow was peaceful.
With free play it was fine and it all came together wonderfully. The four guest did have to leave prematurely due to a "wardrobe malfunction".
After their exit the party continues and four girls played girlie play. Two little boys pared up and life was grand!
It was all perfectly free form. Little to no stress.

Party 2 hours out!

Good Morning! The so called me.

Wow, You think that something is about Gods provision and you just get more than your imagination can fathom.

I met the sweetest, 27 year old last night. It was only in May that she held her mother as she passed. They had taken her to Hawaii and she had swam with the dolphins off the reef just the day before. She passed knowing that she was, no strife, only peace and fellowship as all the women of a family went to rest together. IT was the wish. The wish was met. This young woman shared her story and we later spent several hours propped up on her bed, late into the night, speaking of the greater things the Holy things.
She woke me up within, to who I am, religion of man has left me often feeling confused and in denial of who I am and the gifts that have been bestowed unto me. I come from varied cultures of Jewdao/Christian Faith and simple Relational Friendship/Faith within The Holy One who has created all. I have always had a mind to understand "why" people are "who" they are. Cultural knowledge nullifies the ignorance of prejudges. The Holy Scriptures are my Christian life Manuel, The understanding begets knowledge, and in so practice brings a life of wisdom. It grieves me often that a lack of understanding breeds devision even from our own true hearts. Fear is bread into a error of contempt and offence to one another.
Yet God , God the Creator is LOVE> I want to be called by Him a Friend of His more than anything else. This is my true heart.
My Religion, being to love the widow and the orphan and to keep myself unstained from this world. To Love you as I learn how it is that God loves me. To love you as He does. That is my religion. The life , death, resurrection and return of Christ being my Faith.
We spoke of belief, and life the way we choose to live it. Cultures throughout time have loved this Wonderful Father Creator and it is the news of Christ that is spread that was hoped to unite us. It is however been used through error to divide.
Last night I sat with a young Woman who in so many ways has gifts that are like my own. I speak of the gifts of the spirit.
How I wish to see, the Unity of the intention, that was at the Heart of our Creator our God.
Lets work together.

O.K. are you'all prayin' for me or what!

Extended provision!
So I just walked in peeled the parsnips and the sweet potatoes threw them in the crock. Had to tell you about my trip to the city today!

Well it was like a bell dome jar was all around my car, all the speed-eeacks were kept away from me and no one pushed me through the traffic. The traffic was even light around me for about 100 yards both ways NO CARS!

A little blow up with the Dash guy in the parking lot as he beat his vitamin water (not completely closed) in frustration all offer my beige car seat! But I laid the ground rules down HARD!
So after that a man in the parking lot (the janitor that saw Becca lay hands on Dash on Monday) said" how are you"?. Man I was so embarrassed! I told Dash so too. Well I told him "I was relatively happy just a little stressed at the moment. Thank you"

So my Client loves tigers, Little Dove came to me last Monday and asked if she could give her a tiger cub puzzle that was unopened . I told her that I thought that was a very kind and generous offer (she favored the puzzle) . When she gave it, the woman teared up, said that "it was the best gift ever given her". We had a very nice conversation with other employees. I think she is the boss over the others she has the big office. We exchanged product/funds and then she asked me discreetly if she might give Little Dove a gift for her birthday . I thanked her and said that it would be O.K. She made eye contact and got on the same level. She then proceeded to tell her to "close her eyes", "hold out your hands" "Now you go to Peter Piper and get some pizza"
Little Dove opened her hand and there was a $20. Bill in her little palms. I indicated the acknowledgment of such generosity. Humbly receiving it then I proceeded to tell her about how much the child loves Pizza, that her brother and I are allergic to cheese so pizza is a real treat for her.

I sold another lanyard too.

On the was home I was able to shift to the HUV lane before the end of the tunnel. And easily too! Then all the way home all traffic was 100 yards away from me and when I had to make to interchange I got over without a problem or a quick break light ahead of me. AND no one was tel gating me! I was able to do the speed limit plus five and no one even pushed me around!The roast smelled so good when I walked in.

Oh! and Little Dove got her birthday money in the mail $5. It comes every year without fail. This very elderly couple has prayed for my husband and I , and now children every day for over 25 yrs. They are close friends of my in-laws.
She was so excited too! She needs to write to them.

Good Lesson in Provision.

Sponge Bob Square Pants...
Yes I know... But "Daddy Man" is th Head.

Kids wanted a very expensive one a Lego set. You know those wonderful "keep the kids busy and grow their minds" kinda sets.
Well "Mom Please" = Kids you Pray ask God, Its Up to Him I can not or will not Pay $for it right now.
Well from the prayers of babes. Regularly 28.99 on clearance for $20. (God thing all the other ones just like it on the shelf were full price!) it was going to be set a side but, Dash found it last night in the trunk God wanted to have their lesson fresh. While I do the madness They get to build in a gratitude of answered prayer. (opened the box thought twice, listened to the Spirit, will do when Dad gets home, their good sports and are off to computer time)
Post script 12:15
Wow! I got a call from a young woman who 2 yrs ago privileged me by including me in the birth of her child or as close to it as I'll ever get.

Well I ate my cereal ,crook pot is a cookin', Cake flipped out clean YA!, Laundry folded the kids gathered hangers and the maids are a hummin' (washer and dryer) and the dishes are beggin' to be done. I told that maid to suck it up so she'll be roaring soon (vacuum). Poured the coffee have yet to drink it gotta go break is over...

So... she said that she has a Garage of property from a sister in Christ who just went home from cancer...
Come she told me come. I want you to go through her property at her daughters permission and receive all that you can make use of..I GET A BREAD MACHINE! The kids will get the new pillows they need, we get some pans for the camper (we just asked*prayed*for!) Then she added there is a closet full of clothing my sizes (I will be coming back down to a size 14 soon). PROVISION! Craft supplies and such.
I have no idea off all that is in store for me.
I finished the cake and the decorations on the table> the kids are eating lunch and I , I am, catching my breadth!
I have to go to the city in 45 min with Dash Hawk and Little Dove (who is really overcoming the fact that she REALLY does not want to come.) Man I hope Dash does not get an attitude today, and that Dove keeps her behavior in check I'm tuckered!
Wouldn't it be cool if I sell some more Lanyards, the woman I designed the Tiger Eye Set for will be paying me today. I have clients, Wow! Some day I'll post my jewelery, It is just wierd to post things that are like income. It may be a little tacky.

Good Morning!

Woke up a little late. I had a nice lap around the block and fixed beloveds lunch. I got to go to the hospital with Dash Hawk and do 5 days chore in 5 hours today and a few tomorrow.
I have the cake to decorate and a party tomorrow with 14 kids and 5 women at 2 p.m. I'll post it. Kids are still asleep.
I'll make a pot (4c'er just 2 mugs worth) of coffee. I had some grapes and will do a bowl of cereal grains. I have walked three mornings now.
Can't get in for my knee for three weeks Doc is on vacation (to get a shot or news of what's up with it) so no shot until then (appointment set an the first day of school) I'll drop off kids go get a shot of cortisone(my second since surgery) and then I'll have to take Dash to the city that day after school. I got a standing apt for Little Dove for Tuesday mornings in the fall to resume her Occupational Therapy. We were on a sabbatical for the summer. She sees the psych. at 2p.m.on Wednesday of next week for her med. check. I was able to get her an O.T. apt right before it at 11 a.m. So well take the trek 23 mile one way and make a day of it. I'll save up for a Blempie that will be a good incentive for them to hang in the long haul of a day. So I got all the call backs and appointments managed. Gotta lot to do today.
We were able to stow the tailor and I got the cake and the frosting done last night closed down the house at 11 p. m.
I set the frosting out. I've feed the dogs and now I must be off for I have to be..."WONDER MOM"
It is my calling );0
Please leave me comments they set me on wing.

OH ! HAVE A GRATE DAY* LOOK FOR THE BEAUTY IN YOUR LIFE IT IS EVERYWHERE!

Honor You Husband #9

Off for his run. Its 9 p.m., I catch my breadth.
This morning my love supported my 5:30 a.m. walk, where I had the privilege to spend time with a neighbor who had been haunting me for intercession. I walked out my door looked up with sleepy eyes and there she was. We spoke of the deep things of her soul. I shared my experience strength and hope. She opened her wound and gave me a glimpse, we spoke of the ignorance of the unfeeling and she understood better how their masks were not about her, but their own wounds as the denial keeps them from dealing with it until she touches the pain within them. They then shut her off.
A day. He gave to me the Liberty of homemaking through his efforts to be sole provider.
I went to the grocery store to get powdered sugar, we were almost out of meat and their it was less than half off for London broil and rump roast. I make my own burger. Our meat order 1/2 off. It will mean 98% lean burger home ground once I do the job. I'll post it. Our spring meat order has become depleted. He rejoiced in the provision and looks confidently upon me and my efforts.
Upon arrival He is with an old friend who is suffering beyond measure to laying his life down for a mate hoping beyond all hope for a souls restoration. He stopped his visit to help, they both helped me, with the groceries. The little ones discovered secrets in the trunk and he stopped to fix broken feelings ( the birthday gift from grams was exposed by little brother) He learned a hard lesson that a little knowledge can be a hurtful thing when told.
He read and bedded the kids and I transported our friend to get his truck. My husband had taken the kids with him to rescue the friend from 2 flat tires.
Now he closes the camper for I was not able to finish task. The frosting is made, 9:20 the cake in oven and beloved fixed the garbage disposal that was jammed. Saved big$ not having to get a new one.
We are one symbiotic life form flowing in loving kindness. Priority is the hearts of those around us including our own. I would be so alone without that unity in a marriage. We once had the absence of it for a short season during "mid life crisis" . We are one in purpose. He is my friend.

The Blogger Reflection Award

The Blogger Reflection Award Hosted By Jocelyn Dixon


As for my award, it is called The Blogger Reflection Award. Why? The reason for the title is because this award should make you reflect on five bloggers who have been an encouragement, a source of love, impacted you in some way, and have been a Godly example to you. Five Bloggers who when you reflect on them you get a sense of pride and joy... of knowing them and being blessed by them.

This award is for the best-of-the-best so consider who you pick, carefully. This award should not be given to just anyone. If you're going to do the award don't just write a few words and slap it on your blog. Write real thoughts about these bloggers and what they've been to you, and if the bloggers you pick have already been given the award, don't be afraid to give to them again. They deserve it as many times as it's given.



Gumbo Lily
This sweet Woman opens her heart and home to us. Living a life many of us dream of with great tenacity and endurance. Her love of life shows through her daily posts. The beauty of the world around her is made evident in her skilful photogrphy.
Sliding Down The Scales
Denise is a very soft spoken woman who is all about supporting others and sharing wonderful practical information. Its like a refresher course in healthy living. Along with devotionals that make the nibbler stop and reflect on the moment and heal rather than just stuff those feelings away, and heal with the scriptures applicable.
Just A Mom
My Dear friend is a woman worrier who is in the midst of three teenagers. All adopted, One by One,from infancy through the nightmare of being in the foster care role,all from one troubled birth mother. She fought for 10 years keeping these sisters together and in one fine celebration gave them all one name through adoption. She fostered over 30 infants paying a greater cost than few of us have endured in our roles. She is a woman who although rough around the edges at times examples Gods love in her uniqueness
Life in the Midst of Writing
My Dear friend of so many years now, It was she who many years ago told me about blogging,but it all fell to the way side until "just a mom" got me going again with the help of "are we there yet mom?"
How very blessed I am to have this Woman in my life. A fellow home scholar of three, Missionary and Author (yes published!) She has shown me the tenacity of sticking with your vision and not letting anything distract you from its final completion. She too is a mother of souls. She has been a constant in my life.

Works for Me Wedensday

If Mommie gets ill or has a surgery offer a palat near her for your child. This helps them to feel secure . It also keeps them close, they will break the habbit when mom gets better and they will sleep more restfully. Touch is a major imortance to your young children.Photo taken in 2000 just after one of my surgeries

Good Morning!

Photograph taken in Russian Orphanage.

My Baby turns 10 years old this week. When I saw her photo for the first time and knew that my dreams were coming true I owed it all to joy. All the months of never being impregnated, 16 years of month after month after month.
Here in my sights were the future of Motherhood. A daughter.
A wonderful, kindhearted , imaginative, playful, beautiful daughter. A little sister (in Christ) in this Epic of life that I would be entrusted to parent and nurture.
Children are a gift from God.
I was not there on the day of her birth.
I will owe a debt of intercession to her birth Mom. On the day of her birth this woman made the greatest sacrifice of her life and entrusted this child to God, to me.
It is the greatest responsibility of my life the greatest charge I will ever be given. I have it twice. Knowing that God is our provision I rest in Him. It is He who will equip me for this calling, As every mother knows how desperately we need Him.

Honor your Husband #8

Today another 10 hour day, Home to an untidy house. Kids, summer inside a lively mess. I was mopping the kitchen floor.
He steps over amazed, I reassure him all is well a timer was set and they have a duty in just moments to tidy.
Tired he awaits his meal in silence till he sinks into the dust from whence he came....No wait thats a song.:) Any way he looked into what (spent an hour on line) appeared a way we might be able to replace our old 4 runner, (he wants so badly to take me camping more often) no it was about a retirement vestment with our old employer( thank God we were prudent but that is another 15 years out) . We were with Motorola for over 25 years. He was one of the the last men standing after 6000 folks were laid off. He was not absorbed and all of his references were gone. We were unemployed for almost a year and all but used up the severance because I was in a car wreck. Always God has provided , ALWAYS! Within that time he diligently created history of his family of origin scanning over 600 images and saving countless photographs that were decomposing. On the night before he was finished I went for a walk. I prayed and asked God what do I do ? Do I push or what. God told me just to pray for him and support him to finish what he was doing that it was the most important thing. I obeyed! He was an engineer without a degree. He believed he was not eligible for a job in that field now and had lost all status and rank. He started over again at 47 with a 7 year old and a 3 year old both with special needs. That morning he announced he had finished the project... WITHIN HOURS HE GOT THE CALL AND GOT THE NEW JOB!
Back to tonight:
Saddened he tells me of his disappointment over the low balance in our account. He has been working to set a goal of an emergency savings. He has been doing 10 hour days! With unexpected expenses and a lifestyle set at 1/3 of the income we lived under for so many years the stress gets to him.
We never really practiced debt only our mortgage and the adoptions thank God we were prudent and purchased our third home 7 years ago much under what they tell you you can afford at the lenders.We have set a goal to keep our Home for several reasons. In large part security plays a major role in our lives the kids exist on it. A move would be our last resort.

He still read to the children helped me with the camper and just returned from a short run.
He is exhausted! Day is done and no time for himself. It is now 10 p.m.
He would give me the moon if he were able.
He is going to miss our daughters 10 birthday party. I goofed and set it on a work day.
Please pray for this fine man he is weary of the battle and keeps pressing on. I need to do even better with our budget. It is just really hard to save right now. He wants to save so bad. So do I. I am so grateful that this man keeps our family safe from the storm by having that mind. Balancing his role as husband, father, friend and provider.
He is an amazing MAN THAT LOVES GOD> He says what good is a man if he doesn't love his wife and family.

Beloved's Breakfast Cookies

As promised...Save a lot on breakfast and eat well too.

Ahead of time thaw and let come to room temperature
One pound of Butter
Crack four eggs ( I use free range Large browns with added Omega 3) This here is my BIG secret it rally does make all the difference.)
add 2Tea. Almond Extract ( I used to use Pure Vanilla)
2 C. Brown sugar (packed,this is important to pack it press it down hard)
1 C. Sugar in the Raw, This offers some minerals and a more nutritious option


Cream well for about four minutes to dissolve the sugars (this makes the cookie!)

We call this giving our maidens their tasks :)

Measure out

6 C. whole Oats (not the quick cook type) See the yellow container (set aside)

In the Green container I mix:
3 C. flour ( Spelt, oat, brown rice, millet, whole wheat,the choice is open) I am allergic to wheat. I have a grist mill and grind my own grain, but as in photo you can buy many varieties now. I put this into the green 4 cup measure that holds a little more than 4 C. I then add about
1/2 C. ground flax seed (see the foil jar, Flax needs to be kept from light) This is a pantry staple
2 teaspoons Baking Soda
2 teaspoons SEA SALT (don't bother using dead salt you need the iodine of the real thing.) The flavor is worth the habit!
2 teaspoons Baking Powder
2 teaspoons of Cinnamon forgotten in this batch :) Perfectly imperfect! :)
1 teaspoon clove forgotten in this batch :)



Now that your ingredient's are all measured out ,put your containers all away, Your mixer is all ready for you now.
With the butter, sugars, eggs and almond extract creamed.
You can cover a cookie sheet if you want to do it my way. See the scoop? Great investment!
Creamed and ready.....
Cover your mixer (mine is called Vanilla Spin, so named by Little Dove during a cooking lesson.) With a towel. I have a plastic splash guard and find it a hassle.
The green container has all the powders in it.
blend very well, scrape the bowel. Bend some more.
Now your bowl will be pretty full, add your Whole Oats, blend and scrape, and blend some more.
At this point you may be temped to taste, Don't RAW EGG makes Jill a sick girl :)
because you pre-measured and then put away your containers your counter is pretty clear at this point.
Now using my scoop I scoop out all the cookies at one time. They are uniform and the scoop makes fast work of it. At this point I had to go to the city with Dash;)
The cure for forgetfulness....I keep a jar of cinnamon and sugar in the Pantry for cinnamon toast.
Inventive Homemakers Unite!
I froze this tray in the deep freezer. Every homemaker should have one on her wish list. I saved and got mine during my fourth year of marriage. t has saved us thousands of dollars over the years.
Heat your oven,
300 convection.
350 conventional.

Now as you can see later when I had more home time and the utilities were at the low cost time of day I bake. See the sheets are staged as I remove them promptly. Good tools , the best you can afford will save you a bundle of money and effort over the years. Place and bake. I bake them Oh 10-12 minutes. I never time anymore unless I might be distracted by a kids project. I can tell just by the smell.
I am fresh because I only just have the half job of baking and putting them up.


See the bagged cookies in the back ground... Well three to a pack and we have beloved's breakfast for two weeks in the deep freeze in the garage. We also invested $100. bucks and got a curb side refer that we keep in the garage for drinks and big Costco shops. He exists in the early a.m. quietly. I make his sandwich and a bag of chips, place it on the counter or in his box. we grab the drinks out of the garage refer an O.J. and a coke and a Gater Aide.
See the clean up crew close at foot.
Sometimes I am afforded a few quiet moments for prayer and blogging in the early morning. If the kids sleep in, Dash Hawk is an eagle eye up with the dawn.

Wordless Wedensday

Gracious Hospitaliy has honored me

How touched I was by the kindness offered to me this day. After being told to go visit Gracious Hospitality
I discovered a sweet offering,
I have been given a "Blogger Reflection Award"

The Blogger Reflection Award originated from the lovely blog owned by a sixteen-year-old, home schooled girl at Lothlorien, Realm of the Lady of Light! This was the description of who should be recipients:
As for my award, it is called The Blogger Reflection Award. Why? The reason for the title is because this award should make you reflect on five bloggers who have been an encouragement, a source of love, impacted you in some way, and have been a Godly example to you. Five Bloggers who when you reflect on them you get a sense of pride and joy... of knowing them and being blessed by them.

My gracious fellow blogger said of me...as I tear up with the warmth of such kindness...

Donetta's A Life Uncommon

Donetta is the devoted mother to two internationally adopted children with special needs. Life revolves around selflessly caring for her family, home schooling, and dealing with the unique needs of her children. Always positive and holding fast to God's hand, Donetta shares the common things of life on her life uncommon blog. Her joy at God's blessing in her life is fully evident in all she says! She truly reflects His character.

Thank you.

Its time to clean house!

1987 This is who I looked like under the load.
Good Morning all!
I have to pull up my energies, (make a pot of coffee), take a multi vitamin and a b12.

Its time to clean house.
The camp trailer is out front and has to be secured. I want to remove the fabric (curtains ,bags and, towels all that stuff), and wash it. It has never been washed and although I have only used it a very few times in the years we have owned it. I want to make it mine. We have gone back and forth weather we were going to keep it. So I have never really "made it mine in my heart".

I have a child turning 1o! ,on Friday. Man time will fly. How It was not long ago when I first held her in my arms at 8 months of age, NOW SHE IS 10 DON'T BLINK folks they'll be gone.
My house is in need of a good cleaning. With summer here the love shows :) Floors need sweeping , mopping, rugs need a good vacuuming too. bathrooms ,playroom,bedrooms wit the sheets too.

Most importantly and with grate courage I add.
My physical house needs cleaning! I have allowed it to be neglected and even despised for far too long. Its time to fess up clean up all this heavy baggage of extra weight. Today I "mothered" my own self and began to fight for my body to get free of this embarrassing load. I walked again this morning and I think I will begin a food diary. I am so ashamed of how I look in the photos from the camp trip. There is an extra little person on me. I have tried before and have given up out of another surgery or medical challenge. I have felt be trade by my body and all the stuff it has thrown at me. So I just gave up with a resentment! I have been taking the anger of it all out on me. My body the target. The roots of it all are varied and deep. All I now know is that I want me back. I want me free of this load, I'm tired of carrying it around. I am ashamed and embarrassed. The gift of shame is to make amends and do it differently. I don't deserve to stay in this state of shame any longer. I'm scared to venture out into this maze to accomplish this. I'm more terrified not too. I want to feel beautiful again on the outside too.

Honor your husband day #7

Mondays my husband opens our home to other men. They have a mens support group. He stops in time to be a father to the young ones by reading to them. He has read to the kids every night since they were ours. He started the mens group three years ago after he and five other men did a retreat for over 300 men . So on Mondays after working overtime (as he has every day) to better our budget, he prepares for the guys to come over. Now most Mondays it has whittled down to one man. One has moved last weekend another has a lack of transportation and other choose to let go of the quest for restoration. It is now, One man who along with my husband continue to better them selfs through facing wounds of the heart and overcoming the world with the word of God. For even ONE he stand there available.
He walked in and prepared him self a plate of nachos he never, ever makes a fuss or bothers me in any way to cook for him but is always very kind and generous as I usually do all the cooking from scratch.
Today when my friend came home I was tired. He held me and stilled me. He heard my heart and let me cry a little of the steam off the top we smiled and went on to overcome the challenges of the evening. He supported my exit as to go to get supplies for our daughters 10th birthday on Friday.
He always encourages me to care for my soul, mind and body. This without any condemnation, shame or guilt.
He has tought me love unconditional and offered that to me for so many wonderful years.
He is a good Friend to all who know him.

Photo Hunt

Shadows

O.K. can I cry now?

We left just shy of 2p.m. and just pulled in the door at 4:44. Well after the terrifying trek through the city on the freeway i made it to Dash Hawks appointment on time. I am so tired and I'm not sure why but I feel like I need a good cry.
I took the tiger eye necklace set that the woman requested. She loved it and also another tiger broach. She forgot her check book so I'll get paid on Thursday. It makes me want to just weep to see Gods provision for the gas money to do the trek to the hospital twice a week. This is the second set she has purchased. She also purchased a lanyard.
The girl at the front desk asked to to bring more lanyards on Thursday that another nurse wanted to see them. I wanted to make that woman a pair of earrings to match the lanyard she bought and forgot. I keep forgetting to thank her for all her support. I think that is why I wanted to cry. It is just not my heart to be so forgetful.
I spoke to the therapist and we think that we will need to keep this up during the school year to help Dash Hawk to be able to say "sh" it sounds like an "s" when he says it and its her or the public school.
I choose her, her help is much more desirable he gets a half and hour two times a week. Public school he would be lucky to get 15 min. once a week. That mean folks I just got the news that it is required of me to pull up from within me a long stint of trips to the city. ON SCHOOL DAYS! RUSH HOUR TRAFFIC! It is what is required to give Dash the best chance for a normal life. Little Dove is tired of it and complains a lot.

I awoke to a dream this morning as if I were a child and a boy was interested and liked me , but I could not understand what he was saying. Then some bullie kids teased him. I wanted to punch them out but I knew that that would only make it worse. For a girl to defend a boy to other boys would demascalate him, then I awoke. I went for a walk this early a.m. Dash joined me. I tried to share my heart toward helping him to speak his best.
He gave me a real hard time at therapy and Little Dove became jealous of Dash getting therapy attention and grabbed dashes mouth. I had to correct them and restore enough peace to get Dash into his session. He waisted 10 precious minutes with a bent attitude. I feel worn out!

On a good note we think Dash wont have to have a surgery this fall. I will have to prep him for the amplifiers and microphone for the first grade he is really ticked off about it. I am sad.
Little dove needs to get back into Occupational therapy she is digressing and I am overwhelmed. O.T. is 23 miles one way from here in the other direction than Dash's apt in the city (23miles one way).
I sold $57. worth of jewelery today so I can cover gas. God's provision is good.
I don't feel so much like crying now
thanks

Were Back!

We were delighted to be ready to go when Beloved came home at 11:30 on Thursday. I had loaded all I could lift and he did the rest. I gave my sweet Little Dove some benadrill to help her motion sickness problem. She was knocked out! Poor thing fell asleep on the floor before I could get her to the truck. We pulled out at 12:45, packed and lunched. I had a shower and the dogs were secured! (Thank you J. from JUST A MOM)
We had a nice long drive up to the Rim. Beloved loves books on tape, so we heard a wonderful tale of "Who moved my cheese" on the way up. This is a MUST to read or hear. It is a wonderful life lesson story about the ability to grow with the inevitable changes of life.
We also heard "Ten Bears in a Bed" a fantastically funny children's story of a spoof on the classics.
We passed through Payson, and then headed on FR300.

"Out on the open road, elbow in the breeze he pulled his woman to him and gave her heart a squeeze." a line in an old Don Francisco song.
We pulled into camp around four. The best spot in the whole forest :)! We sat down in a dish and the five acre edge of the bowl gave us full view of the kids at all times! It was an amazing spot! The trees were friends awaiting us to come out and play.
The "Daddy Man" did the best thing! He hung a nice rope from a tree and the stump near by served as the Perfect jumping off post. The kids played "Teribithia" to their hearts content. While we set camp.

Camp set up well and this was the very first perfectly imperfectly packed, planned and established even that I can ever remember doing. I was totally un-stressed! A real change for me. No stress meant no strife! No expectations or dis-pleasures. I only forgot flip flops for the Mister and salt( We used the bacon for the salting of a bite of eggs a bite of bacon). I didn't even stress or plan either!
We set up the tent across the grounds for the kids to have to play in. It also served to keep un-wanted campers away . This was an added bonus we will have to remember.
Bedtime of the first night the kids were so happy that we forgot the story books. Mom had brought her bible! They wanted to hear about baby Moses, next night more Moses, and the third night the story of Jesus birth begining with John the Baptist. Little Dave set the scene about how Zackariah could not speak cause he laughed at God! Man the things they absorb is so heart warming! I just lay there and took in the sweetness as the "Daddy Man" read and screened question after question.
The children had so many, many wonderful adventures. Little Dove discovered the most placid non obtrusive horse fly I have ever experienced. She at one point sat on a log and watched as one sat on her finger. She observed it clean both under and over its wings. Now to some this may sound an odd joy, but to understand a child who has sensory problems and trouble with anxiety one might grow to rejoice with me. Her and Dash Hawk looked at life up close and personal. That is one of the most important ( to me ) gifts that I want to offer them.
They worked on their sketch pad and drew cool pictures with the "Daddy Man". He is a fun artist that has a humor that would just bring a smile to any soul.
Breakfast in the woods just would not be complete without BACON! And all who awaited this fine feast would ask repeatedly "Is it ready Mom?" over, and over, and over... Our camper has a stove inside and also one that is able to be attached to the outside. Great to keep the fumes out of the sleeping chambers. I love to cook out side.
Daddy man took the camera and the children on several hikes.
The first morning I made fiber crosses out of the fibers that were encased in the rope we were using for the swing. It was my hope that the kids would be more interested, but not yet. They had too big a wood for crafts. However they did like what I made for them.
We sat around and told stories of our youth and how we dealt with bullies. We told about mistakes we made when we were kids. I think that this was some of my favorite time together.
There were to many trees to climb, battles to fight within the forest citadel, The kings thrones and fair warrior maidens had to arm themselves with pine cone bombs and fight off the enemy. "ME" I was the one who was the dark character. We had dueling swords and the battle was fierce,
alas Daddy man awoke and it was he who became the entertainment.
They had hot dogs after the hike. The second hike of the afternoon. I had much time alone with the forest friends. We had a camp squirrel family that we fed and they were so cute. While I was alone in camp I had one bold little squirrel come right up an sit in front of me . I felt someone looking at me and as I looked up from my needle work the looked right at me I could have reached out and touched him with hardly a stretch. He scurried off. I was then to look up and see another cheeky little fellow come for a visit, in the interim I had placed a slice of bread on the log before me. He was so skinny the cheeky guy and he at last found the treasure and delightfully devoured it. We had a humming bird who took a favor to us. We had his company several times a day. He was our alarm clock the first morning with open windows he came back and forth accross the screen checking us out until we finely awoke and he was off.

In the afternoons (each day) we had a rain shower! I was so beautiful! The encampment was surrounded by ferns in the wooded sloping outskirts of our paradise. When the sun would come out it was a shimmering wonder of light and shadow. We had to play in the rain. This is a favorite thing for me to do. There are stories of ( the crazy woman who walked out in the rain) me taking long playful walks. Kicking up the puddles and soaking my clothing. It is so fun when you live in the desert to be playful during the monsoons.
The Mister with tears in his eyes had to capture me washing the feet of the children. He began telling them how Jesus washed the feet of his disciples. The children were so dear as to share what they understood of such things. One of those perfect teaching moments.
As the banker I had a wonderful time plying Monopoly with the family. I went out with the dignity of all property a loss without the dealing and debiting. It was another perfect life lesson. The sweet Little Dove just couldn't understand and wanted to give me her money and excuse my debt. The "Daddy Man" and I were in cahoots to help the lesson have great value and impressive sportsmanship. It matters most what they see! Little Dove won her first game of Monopoly just in time for the smores that I (because I lost) was preparing over the stove. The Mister was sad because he cant have chocolate due to migraines, but I had made several for him without it and he was so pleased and hugged his gratitude.
We had a fresh melon in the afternoon it was so nice to eat outside.
I had knee surgery last fall an am not able to use my knee so well, so I walked part way with the family, Sweet Little Dove worried over me and held my hand. I returned to camp and set the walkie talkie, Mace aside on the table. We had had a strange visit from a guy on a tote goat he just pulled up said "do ya got dogs? I like to run mine" then pulled off. WEIRD!
So I am alone at came and had just started to work on my oil painting and looked down to a "pit bull dog" right at my feet! I reached over got the talkie and mace, called hubby told him, then this guy pulls into my camp! Not 12 feet from me, right next to our trailer, stops and just lets his three dogs run the camp! Meanwhile I'm on the talky telling Hubby. I say "HELLO" to the guy and he just sits there. I tell Hubby right in front of the guy watching me on the talky. He pulled up near the swinging tree and shuts off his bike. Hubby to the defense tells kids "stay behind me" Approaches the dude to tell him he did not appreciate him coming into our camp and letting his dogs run through it an pee all over it! HUBBY WAS BOLD he had a big stick! The guy said "hay bro its cool" "NO ITS NOT" SAID HUBBY!
Later hubby admitted how good it felt to come to my aide. I felt so protected by him. The guy was just without boundaries, but still, I did not know him or his dogs. Dogs act different than you expect in the woods many a fool has learned this lesson the hard way. I HAVE KIDS! I was alone in a camp site! Although I'm not a young woman I am still a woman alone in a camp!
Dash had many battles to fight and defend his territory! His Father showed him how to stand up for His own.
I had a lot of rest and worked the stitches on the quilt blocks given to me, painted a picture and made fiber crosses. I played house in my "cabin" and all in all was delighted at how perfect the un-expected has supplied all of my hearts desires.
The quiet time was so healing.
My children are so loud! They are so happy and I am very grateful. Beloved was amazed at the volume of two kids who in their glee can reverberate the forest into a hall of sound!
He tells me " I don't know how you do it".
Beloved is in a cubical all day in the quiet! Man was he ear worn!
One of the things I have to face is caring better for this vessel called me! My body deserves some attention so Beloved and I worked out a way for me to wake early and walk. It is so hard for me to sleep if I go to bed and am awaken by him, I cant return to sleep. So this is a challenge. Perhaps late night, early rise (for a walk) and a nap in the day time?

Beloved also told me I must get out in the evening for a time in the quiet, but the kids have a panic! The are terrified of my absence. I was in a VERY bad car accident three years ago (I was hit by a guy doing 120 m.p.r.) and they all could of lost me (NOT REALLY GODS HAND WAS ON ME :) ) it was traumatic for them. With the remnant's of their attachment disorder they can be fearful to a stress on us.
We had a daring game of gold fish and had candied peanuts for bait. The thunder caused a little regression on Dash Hawk, He got to talk about his fear and the fear of the gun shots someone was triggering off in the distance.
He felt better when the play resumed in his favor.
"Daddy Man" thought to take some pictures for me not to miss out completely on the hikes. It is real hard not to be able to join them. I did however get some pain relief for my knee, after the second day, and took a solitary hike into the forest. It was really quiet and I had a lot of time for reflection and prayer of the duties to come in the following few months. I prayed for those things of concern and placed them down to be given the wisdom of being able to pick them up only in the due time.



We had the clean up to do and packing it all up. The children were happily reading in the truck ready to return home to their dogs and their T.V. They were ready, happy and satiated.
We had been so conservative with our water and fuel that I got to take a nice shower and wash may hair. It was so fun to use my "cabin on wheels" It is like a home in the forest to me.

The children had a few more good swings on the rope. We left it tied to the tree for the next camper to enjoy.


They all went on a hike while I washed the "cabin" down , swept it out and loaded the seats with the bags Beloved had rolled up. WE all had a really refreshing time.
Beloved had a lot of fear to overcome driving us home.

We gave our Sweet Little Dove her Benidril and got onto the open road. It was a very quiet ride home. Sweet Dove was asleep and Dash was very contemplative and quiet. We had to stop for gas $40. worth and we were home before 4 p.m.
Four days a tanks of gas, a few groceries from the pantry and a lot of memories for our hearts to treasure.
A great Big Thank You To All of you at "Just a Mom" , Thank you to her kids too for the help with the dogs.
The biggest Thank You to My Dear Beloved who challenged the fears and risks of taking us up in our under powered but reliable 4 Runner. Who at times just made a crawl up the hills with everything it had to offer (it would top out at 28m.p.h.). It was very humbling for the sweet "Daddy Man". He has made my heart refreshed. He is a good friend and faithful lover of my soul.