Carnaval of family life.

Photo taken at Easter.


10 a.m. here. I watched a movie with Dash. An old ,very old, Bat man / Super Man. We love very old videos because they are (for the most part) of better character. We don't have cable and the kids only use channel 8 for (the most part). Very old videos are very cheep too. You can often get them new for $1-$2.
Well I watched about 2/3 of it cuddled with Dash, he went and got my bed pillows and then one for himself . I was sorta cold and without even having to ask he went to his room retuning to cover me up. He is such his fathers son.
I fell asleep from 7:30 until 9:30 a.m., the movie must of ended because when I awoke the T.V. was off. My Daughter calling "Clifford, Clifford" They were looking for a stuffed toy! How children believe that the toy will hear and answer them is just magical. However when your being awaken by it it takes a moment to find it's charm. It can be rather annoying. They are now practicing whistling. I brewed a cup of coffee. Today will be a day of tasks, with an afternoon play date in the mix. My tasks are essential, I have at times forgotten the value of all that I accomplish. I imagine, I as a Mother, am not alone in that thought. We are vital!
How very tired I was, now more rested from my first nap since the ancient days of well, months ago (I am guessing) . I have a real heart of compassions for the Mothers of infants who are so often sleepless. I have a "Night Dove", and a "Dawn Dash". Well Dash actually let my beloved and I get that last half hour of sleep today (first time all week).
We were set to sleep last night and when Beloved left his shower to come for me he discovered a "bomb" on the bedroom floor (the kind with a runny trail) you know the kind that when your all out of the diapering stage and the puppy is a dog, "bomb". Well my kindness actually blew up in my face (the chicken broth did not agree with his constitution)! Or carpet as it happens. You know the ONLY carpet left in the whole house. The carpet right next to where two very tired souls will have to sleep (smelling it!). Well the dogs belong down on all fours not us, usually Hubby does the task, but with great mercy I accomplished it while he went out into the garage to fetch the shampooer. So tasks accomplished, hands washed we just wobbled with fatigue (the smell may of had a little to do with it too) :). We spoke late to cover days events with the kids interventions. I had to introduce him to all the new players. The day was so done. We were so tired that the touch of our toes became our kiss goodnight. We touch toes a lot these days.
The kids really do care about us parents. When worn so thin they can sometimes seam like the enemy. They are not. The lack of my own self care has been my greatest foe.
We took the kids to Costco and I got the end of the shopping for the next several months. I am so glad.
We have I.E.P.'s to do on both of them. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this it is Individual Education Plan. Special Needs children have to have these in place to qualify and (hopefully receive) the special kinds of help the need. "Daddy Man" and I have exhausted our private sources($) almost, so we will begin to gain more federal/state assistance from the public school arena. We have paid taxes all of our lives and have done (almost) all that we have been able too do. It is humbling and with great gratitude too that we have some help. However it is said that the public school systems have the employees who are low end of the professions skills. I cant just dwell on that though. I have watched those whose hearts are bigger than their wage in all circles with the years I have intervened in the lives of my children and all those I Mothered during the years I served the community on behalf of other at risk kids.
This is a real life, uncommon perhaps but real. I could just cry. I know that I am walking into a battle that I alone have to wage, to accomplish the needs of these two wonderful little human beings. I know that every child deserves what I am about to go though and few will get it . Motherhood is HARD work. It is my choice and calling to do so. I am afraid of all of the arrows that intend to defray me from my just cause. I am overwhelmed by the thought of what I must accomplish on this front alone. As I also have a role here that is very demanding of my other skills. Saddened that two children must wage war against all the turbulence ahead. I am honored to have the privilege to both attend to task and equip them for the tasks ahead.
I hear the laughter from the other room and I weep, I know that it will be that laughter, that very laughter, that will pull from me those things required of me in the weeks, months and years ahead.
This day I will try to remember to befriend the foe of self neglect, so that I have all of my resources to maintain my charge and solemn duty.
I am in the real school now :)