Mother- Daughter Carnaval~ Eye Contact

October 01, 2007

Mother- Daughter Blog Carnival

My pal Sarah at Real Life has started a Mother-Daughter Blog Carnival,
Here's what she has to say about the Carnival:

We moms face many issues as we travel on the journey of motherhood. As a mom of three girls, I've found that raising girls has it's own unique set of joys and challenges, and it's fair share of DRAMA!! I looked for a blog carnival catering specifically to mothers and daughters, and I couldn't find one. This is not to say that it doesn't exist, I just couldn't find it. So I decided to start a new one. (What is a blog carnival?)

It will be hosted by" One Day at a Time"

Eye Contact

My Miss fiction is a very sweet 10 year old. Today she anounced that the school has given her a speech evaluation. When I asked her what the woman looked like she said she had very dark eye brows. She had only looked at the womans eyes. She can not remember anything else.
Eye contact.
A simple thing to most of you mothers a hard won thing for us. Most of you know my girl was adopted at seven months and had never been touched. So for her we had a big journey into eye contact. All of the things that are normal and expected for most of you Mothers, happen at expected intervals. Not so with a special needs child.
The one thing that causes me more of a challenge than any thing in my parenting with my daughter is the very thing that makes my daughter so charming and dear to be with.
Her heart is good. Her motives are good. My girl lives in fiction, a world of made up characters and events that even at 10 years of age become so vividly real to her that the reality of her surroundings is blurred. So many items around here are broken each day and so many role plays present present dangers that I MUST always be on my alert. It can tire me and discourage me to no wit. It also inspires and impresses me. It is also so wonderful. Imagination is powerful and she sets wing and believes she is flying. Most kids pretend they are but to her SHE IS!
How hard it is to feel like I must always correct or defer her antics to keep the peace between siblings, to have them both safe. This child would grow to make an amazing director. She feels, sees and smells as if it were real around her. All that is real around her disappears until you speak her back into the moment.

She is so athletic, I think we let her down in this. With a variety of reasons we cant keep up a extracurricular class or lessons. She is so strong. In school she would be great in sports. She being the only one in our family who would advance, or take interest in them (except the interest she compels).

She is growing up and is so cute she came to me to talk tonight while I was in the master bath. She took a favorite essence oil and we made a jar of her favorite lotion. Peppermint/Lemon was her choice she was delighted to create it. We were having a great time together . She began her bath, and all of a sudden she was in the deep ocean and the waves toped the tub onto the carpet she was startled at what she had done and felt remorse. It was so beautiful to hear her in her marine world and then the let down into the reality of (the cleaning needing to be re-dune and the candles all wet). Non of that must matter in a way, yet it can be so frustrating. I just stopped. Watching her swish her hair out under the water as if she were an aquatic mammal. She spoke of the sea and how she wondered if she came out of the water. I told her of the water of the womb she grew in. I KNEW IT! I knew I came out off the sea!...Said she.
She has a beauty that I can not hold it is like the waters flowing through my hands and evaporating onto the bathroom carpet, full of joy untill the moment hits her with the remorse of what occurred back here on dry land.
Oh the paradox, and the beauty. May I keep her spirit alive through all of this.