Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Its time to clean house!

1987 This is who I looked like under the load.
Good Morning all!
I have to pull up my energies, (make a pot of coffee), take a multi vitamin and a b12.

Its time to clean house.
The camp trailer is out front and has to be secured. I want to remove the fabric (curtains ,bags and, towels all that stuff), and wash it. It has never been washed and although I have only used it a very few times in the years we have owned it. I want to make it mine. We have gone back and forth weather we were going to keep it. So I have never really "made it mine in my heart".

I have a child turning 1o! ,on Friday. Man time will fly. How It was not long ago when I first held her in my arms at 8 months of age, NOW SHE IS 10 DON'T BLINK folks they'll be gone.
My house is in need of a good cleaning. With summer here the love shows :) Floors need sweeping , mopping, rugs need a good vacuuming too. bathrooms ,playroom,bedrooms wit the sheets too.

Most importantly and with grate courage I add.
My physical house needs cleaning! I have allowed it to be neglected and even despised for far too long. Its time to fess up clean up all this heavy baggage of extra weight. Today I "mothered" my own self and began to fight for my body to get free of this embarrassing load. I walked again this morning and I think I will begin a food diary. I am so ashamed of how I look in the photos from the camp trip. There is an extra little person on me. I have tried before and have given up out of another surgery or medical challenge. I have felt be trade by my body and all the stuff it has thrown at me. So I just gave up with a resentment! I have been taking the anger of it all out on me. My body the target. The roots of it all are varied and deep. All I now know is that I want me back. I want me free of this load, I'm tired of carrying it around. I am ashamed and embarrassed. The gift of shame is to make amends and do it differently. I don't deserve to stay in this state of shame any longer. I'm scared to venture out into this maze to accomplish this. I'm more terrified not too. I want to feel beautiful again on the outside too.

6 comments:

Denise said...

You are already beautiful my dear, you are a daughter of the King, that makes you a princess. But, I do understand what you are saying. I am proud of you for walking. I will be cheering you on. You can be successful.

Denise said...

Yes, you can still join tales from the scales sweety. It ends in september. Here is the link:http://www.talesfromthescales.net/

La Tea Dah said...

Donetta, for the past two months I have been doing some 'spring cleaning' myself. Although beautiful as we are, once the pounds start rolling off and the energy levels are starting to restore --- the joy of lightness and freedom makes all the hard work seem so very worth it! Success to you on your journey!

:) LaTeaDah (-20)

La Tea Dah said...

Donetta, please visit Gracious Hospitality when you have time. You have been awarded The Reflective Blogger Award!

Thank you for blessing my life!

LaTeaDah

Pearls of Wisdom said...

Dear Donetta,

I have just found your blog I agree with Denise you are beautiful my friend. Nice to "meet ". I have enjoyed my visit to your blog.

Angel ():)

Anonymous said...

You are a very beautiful person inside and out.

This heat has zapped me to point I do very little cleaning. I wish I had half the childrens' energy to whirlwind clean it, as fast as they get it messy!

Older women likewise teach the younger women...

• how to love their husbands
• how to love their children
• how to be self-controlled
• how to be pure
• how to be keepers at home
• how to be kind and submissive (not subservient) to their own husbands. (See Titus 2:3-5)

Blog Archive

By Maya Angelou

'A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ
That a man should have to seek Him first to find her.'

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not shouting 'I'm clean living,'
I'm whispering 'I was lost, Now I'm found and forgiven.'

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.

When I say.. 'I am a Christian' I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible, but God believes I am worth it.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I still feel the sting of pain...
I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner Who received God's good grace, somehow!

Words have power. Here are a few of my favorite sayings.

  • A warm cup of tea is like a cuddle with a friend.
  • The North American Indians have a more eloquent word for ‘friend’ than we do in English. In their language, the word for friend literally means, “the one who carries my sorrows on his back.”
  • Return with Honor
  • The sage anticipates things that are difficult while they are easy, and does things that would become great while they are small. All difficult things in the world are sure to arise from a previous state in which they were easy, and all great things from one in which they were small. Therefore the sage, while he never does what is great, is able on that account to accomplish the greatest things."
  • "HOME IS WHERE YOUR STORY BEGINS"
  • “Live so that when your children hear these words they think of you… Fairness Caring Integrity Honesty Love Trust.”
  • "O Lord help my words to be gracious and tender today, for tomarrow I may have to eat them."
  • "No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes"
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This was given to me for the third time in just a few weeks.

Zephaniah 3:17 NLT
"For the LORD your God has arrived to live among you. He is a mighty savior. He will rejoice over you with great gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will exult over you by singing a happy song."

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