Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Home from Disneyland

Hello all,
We are home.
We were watched over
Given favor over and over and over and over and over again.
We came home a car limping as it is,
Bless God for DUCT TAPE!!!!!!!!!
For the first day we were in a car accident near the beach
The others involved at the seen was respectful,
The kids an emotional mess.
Sweet angles were sent to help me calm them.
No One was hurt.

It was wonderful at the beach
The wonder of the little ones was priceless
We were given favor by a stranger when our time had run out on our meter they inserted coin just prior to the meter attendant.
While parked at a Wally World Steve purchased the Duct Tape while I called claims.
We now have much to face including a $1000. deductible.
We were at fault :{

We Limped on into Anaheim, parked the car and
Frugality a must
we had incurred the deductible

Our lodging gave us a upgrade for free ($35 savings x4)
The travel agency set us all up in one king bed!
an extra stuffed toy for free
wireless for free
a safe for free
Kindness unmeasurable!

Disney pictures to come as well as trip pictures.

I have THE most amazing children ever!!!!!!
Folks not one time did my kids ask us for one thing that we did not offer them!!!!!!

We ate one meal in the park and out of the hotel room all the rest.
We back packed in water and snacks from home.

We were given unprecedented favor at Disneyland.
Personal attendance, grace and favor at long lines
taken to the FRONT of lines!!!!!!!!!
Given gifts!

Only once was a disappointment when we were forced to tell Dove no to a character meal $$$$$$$$$$
So We all held hand, prayed that God would make a way
Greater yet she saw GOD meet her hearts desire!!!!!!!!!!!
all character signatures were acquired and the kids were satisfied and very happy!

The very hardest thing of our trip....
We were faced with the severity of Doves Special Needs.
Having her in school, and only home on a schedule, well we forgot.
We forgot about her emotional status.
Her sensory, panic, social cognitive, and well just sweet beauty broke our hearts.

We told her she did not have to ride anything she did not want too.
However very first ride
WE screwed up!
We were almost at the head of the line after an hour and a half wait.
She given all the chances to wait with me , she not wanting to DISAPPOINT!
We (forced) convinced her to go, her and I both HATED IT!
Indiana Jones ride.
The boys have a separate taste than her and I.
The park was ruined for her after that!
My consequence for being selfish and not walking out.

We (I) was/were mostly forced to walk around with her the whole time.
She was over stimulated and cried and wept, and was just plain terrified.
She felt so bad about herself too (that was the worst part to me).
I spent almost the whole three days holding her at my side.
It was only perhaps a total of 4 hours we even got to see her smile.
It was really heart breaking.
I sobbed my eyes out this morning in the shower at the hotel just to release the stress of it.
It was really so hard.
She clung to me , yes clung!
Even on the little train!
It took me a day to regain her trust, three days for Steve.
What is scary to her was nothing to his mind.
So he simply did not understand the magnitude of it.
He felt awful too, we did not save 6 years for a trip to see our baby so distraught.

She did however love the pool.
At times we simply could NOT get her out of charater (fictional) when she was playing with her brother. It really is so hard to put into words what we expiernced that so opened our eyes. Steve and I both see it however and he suggested we make notes of it to have to get the help we may need for her. The education we need to help her as well.
I am so grateful that she is a happy child.

God has cleared the haze and now I must again face this sweet babies needs.
I must now become a mommy bear for her.
We do not know what her future holds, but we do know who holds the future.
Case in point...she cried and wept and was terrified to go into "its a small world".
It took almost half the ride to see a smile on her face.
She was just panicked!
We tried ear plugs it helped a bit.
The sounds , sights and sensory was just WAY WAY TOO MUCH for her.

Next vacation THE FOREST!

Now we felt this way six years ago (the last time we went).
I remember telling Steve NEVER AGAIN!
WE "thought" it was just her needing to out grow the 4 year old (at 6 years of age) inability of fact/fiction delineation.
She is now 11....
She is not just two years behind in the academics,
she is special needs in the other ways they tried to tell us about.
We just too easily became blind to it.
I listened too much to my critics and began to believe them that I was just making too much out of it, that "what do those professionals know anyway" "that's how they get their money out of you"...and all of that.
I fell victim to listening to all those well meaning nay sayers who lovingly wanted to just make us feel better. Maybe I needed too for a while, I just got so tired.
She really can't function normally.
My Sweet Lord she is still 4.
She is a grown up in body. A young lady who is only maybe 4-5 emotionally.
It really is sweet and beautiful to have her so full of that simple wonder.

Oh when she was happy !!!!!!!
It was mostly the sweet baby rides, and three outdoor roller coasters.
Only an outside coaster, the rush of movement was good.
An out side car, the tea cups.
Any heavy physical sensory movement with NO other stimulus.
It stimulated her sense's in a pleasing way.
EVERYTHING else was tears and trembling!

She may not "grow up" out of it.
We have work to do, more to learn and prepair for.
GOD will make us able , but we are both so stunned and deeply moved by the reallity of it.

Pretty big gift for us huh...

Dash had a blast!
He sucked it up!
Only thing was....His special needs....he can't take any physical free fall feeling and HATED roller coaster type rides!!!

Go figure...

Steve and I saw very little of each other.
We took turns with the kids.
Mostly though I kept Dove, for she was glued to me.
Dash wanted time with his daddy.

We enjoyed being with our children.
we are blessed!


Amrita said...

Dearest Donetta,

Nice to read about your holiday.But sorry for the accident and Dove 's turmoil.

It could have been worse is all I can say.

Growing up with physical handicaps is very scary ask me.
I grew up with a visual handicap (hearing came in my 20s) so i know how scary and bewildering the world looks. I was very insecure and boltled it all up becasue I was not nurtured as you are doing for your daughter.The only sympathy I got was from my gandma.People were not very aware of these things in those days.

When I was in grade 5 I wrote a letter to my mother describing my physical problsms and put it inside her handbag. She never responded...maybe she did not read it or never found it.Don 't know.
I really admire the nurturing heart you have.

Annette said...

I'm glad your home, I missed you! My son, who is now a teenager, had ADHD and people just didn't or didn't want to know about it, I got HORRIBLE looks from strangers when he acted out, or I was told "ADHD, it's an excuse for allowing your child to act that way, break his spirit" break a spirit? I would have broken those evil people's evil spirit and at times did.....verbally!! my Johnanthon would get over stimulated so easy and still does at time's. God allow this trip so all of you can learn and grow...I love how God allowed you to be a mommy to these beautiful angels, but then again, I'm partial to special needs children, my God daughter is and she has lite my world up, one day I'd like to be foster mother to a special needs child..they teach us so much, if we, who are standing on the outside just take a special moment and look with an open heart.
Love ya bunches~

Denise said...

Welcome home dear one, you were missed. So sorry about your accident, praise God none of you were hurt. I am glad you all had a nice time. I love you.

Older women likewise teach the younger women...

• how to love their husbands
• how to love their children
• how to be self-controlled
• how to be pure
• how to be keepers at home
• how to be kind and submissive (not subservient) to their own husbands. (See Titus 2:3-5)

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By Maya Angelou

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When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not shouting 'I'm clean living,'
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When I say... 'I am a Christian' I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.

When I say.. 'I am a Christian' I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible, but God believes I am worth it.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I still feel the sting of pain...
I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner Who received God's good grace, somehow!

Words have power. Here are a few of my favorite sayings.

  • A warm cup of tea is like a cuddle with a friend.
  • The North American Indians have a more eloquent word for ‘friend’ than we do in English. In their language, the word for friend literally means, “the one who carries my sorrows on his back.”
  • Return with Honor
  • The sage anticipates things that are difficult while they are easy, and does things that would become great while they are small. All difficult things in the world are sure to arise from a previous state in which they were easy, and all great things from one in which they were small. Therefore the sage, while he never does what is great, is able on that account to accomplish the greatest things."
  • “Live so that when your children hear these words they think of you… Fairness Caring Integrity Honesty Love Trust.”
  • "O Lord help my words to be gracious and tender today, for tomarrow I may have to eat them."
  • "No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes"

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