Just pray for me will you please

I do not know how to post the things that are going on in and around my life right now.
If I were to speak ...would that edify?
All I can do is to hold onto who I am.
Optimism has always been my strong suit.
It is become a suit dusty and worn.

It is in these shadows I see the lights of your friendships and kindness glow brightly.
Yet I am of no words for the words held behind tongue bitten between teeth.
I can not let it struggle free.
Oh as tempting as may be...I will be better than that.
I have to lay it down lay down the rights that we might think we have.
But I am not my own and my own mind and words do not shine well this trial.

Those post of superfluous things are empty to me right now.
I am pained to my utter core. It has just been easier to pull away.
Pressed on several fronts.

I think that I may have been misunderstood and judged by my readers.

There is a movie of a poor woman who suffered...
Le Miserab ...not the perticular trial to be sure:)
but in it she said a line that rings to me...as the jailer arest her for a crime that was an abuse of power by another she said "I know I have done wrong but is it right for them to distroy my only dress?" pleading she begs for mercy from the jailor only to see contemp toward her and hatred...then comes the male lead that comands her justice!
With a tone and a voice of power he paid her debt. He takes her and cares for her and stands at death watch as her last ounce of strength leaves her...
Grieving that he had neglected due to distraction of duty.
It is then that his word to her is kept and he rescues her young one.
He defends the child to his utmost. When grown the child demands understanding through rebelion and the risk of her own harm and his.

Once again a Great Aunt

Baby Brody
Born 11:45 last night is healthy and Mom is well.
As his daddy looks down from heaven.
I can not get the image to post.

please pray...

My husbands Maturnal Uncle by marriage...
is on death watch he last day...moments.
The family is circled around.

Thankful Thursday *Slow Down

Smelling the flowers along the way!

• Main Entry: ¹pro·vi·sion
• Pronunciation: \prə-ˈvi-zhən\
• Function: noun
• Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, from Late Latin & Latin; Late Latin provision-, provisio act of providing, from Latin, foresight, from providēre to see ahead — more at provide
• Date: 14th century

1 a : the act or process of providing b : the fact or state of being prepared beforehand c : a measure taken beforehand to deal with a need or contingency : preparation provision for replacements>
2 : a stock of needed materials or supplies; especially : a stock of food —usually used in plural
3 : proviso, stipulation

join us here

An amazing day!

This my day, a gift I lived made my heart dance as a grateful princess before her

Father

The morn a treat of wifery and motherhood.

On to an appointment with the Neurologist.

There I find a professional who so admires me and my character. He delighted that I have begun the EDMR smiled and told me that he too had begun his training. My (top 20+ yr neuro in the valley) was delighted to find that all three players in my health care are working as a team with one mind. The Physician doing the EDMR so highly esteems the Neurologist that she will be working closely with him in the PTSD work. My MD is fond of the whole process and has set me up with a medication to ease the stress when the PTSD hits. Because it is provoked by stress and my biochemical inability to manage the stress due to brain neurological damage the meds will keep me able to stop the progression when it hits.

I completed this month what he had asked of me and he is very pleased.

He strongly feels (that with the exception of the UIO lesions in the white matter) that I have a very good prognosis of not only stopping the continuing neuro pathway damage but also possible reversing it!

He will watch the lesions with CT yearly as they have grown. Due to the PTSD I awake often sometimes nightly with panic. It is not congruent or associated with anything it is just the brains way of firring off the fight flight mechanism. After speaking with him and ruling out my willingness to take a sleep aid like ambium that knocks you out and leaves you drowsy the next day...we discussed the herb valarian root. He thinks however that using a perceptions form of melatonin and getting the sleep cycle regulated it will be of good support with the upcoming EMDR sessions. Get this he GAVE me 12 days of samples and a coupon for a MONTH FREE. It is a purer derivative than that I could find in a health food store and assimilates more effectively.

I will take my first dose tonight.

As was last Thursday a recurrent circumstance happened.

As I pulled out of the parking lot across the street was an elder walking in this heat. After having Heat Exhaustion last week I am VERY thoughtful of the issue. I pulled over to give her a lift. She was 91 years old!!!Walking what would have been a MILE AND A HALF!!!!!!!!!!!!! She missed the bus.

Now on the way she said to me that she is of no more use now.

Well I walked her into the office and informed the clerk she was on foot and asked them to please look to her transport. I then bent down to tell her that she had lied to me. That it was a lie that she is of no use. That I needed her to be an example to me of the truth of her value as do all of the other women who look to our elders for example. She spoke of a great grand child and I told her that THEY need her and told her flat out to call them. It was so cool.

Well I was off and went on to meet my friend at the mall.

When I arrived early I decided to make use of a coupon and looked for a pair of shoes...walked away with $60 two pair for $34.

Oh too cute! I got a pair of purple shoes! I have always wanted a pair of purple shoes!

My dear friend and I had a nice visit and when I went to get a sandwich I was given a second one for FREE! I took it home to the kids for after school.

God has been teaching some things about being a seer and how in the church any gift but the gift of prophecy is tolerable and acceptable. I have witnessed I believe folk who have this innate gift find acceptance only in the dark arts of becoming a psychic I think that if given the right to be who God gifted them to be that the light empowered gift could really do a lot of good in this world .

These people are rejected out of ignorance and misinterpreted scripture. Doing what they do for the pride and gain of dollar is a plight driven through temptation and rejection.

Well my friend is an adopted soul who has discovered her birth mom is such a one.

Now it is just last evening that God had been showing Himself through the creation off ALL of the universe. Even the wise men looked to the stars. They had their eyes to all that was Holy however.

I had shared these thought for she had asked me of my thoughts on the issue almost three years ago. I had wanted to make a point to answer her query today.

Last night her birth mom contacted her...timing

So then... we spoke of another soul who needs to be needed and devised a way to allow them to express the gift of skill and we could then share our knowledge in the computer arena and solve an issue of need that the person has. So cool to see how all of this is orchestrated.

My Sweet friend and I then walled some and for the first time in a very long time I bought some clothing for myself. 75% off of things that were marked down already 50%! $45 tops for $4.99 so amazing!

I spent $75 and I saved $265

A nice dress, jean shorts a sweater and three nice tops (one beaded) at Lane Bryant Also if I go back and spend $50 I will have $25 off for she gave me a coupon.

Well with errands and children to tend too we parted ways.

I went to get dog food...yep.. ya ready!

so $38 a bag marked down to $32 I had a $2 coupon

Two coupons for $4 each to get a treat or toy and on a clearance I found two VERY nice treat balls for the dogs (I mean hefty ones) were FREE normally like $12-15 each

$58 ish for $32

So I stopped at Wal-Mart and ran in for the pillow forms I needed, got home just in time to ready a plate of half a sub, Frito's and let them share a soda.

Oh HAPPY KIDS!

They did their homework and chores happily.

My Beloved saw me skitter and dance with glee my new clothes and purple shoes just make me feel like a princess!

Oh but this day

with this presence and this provision extended to me left me walking the clouds as I shiver and chill to the presence of all that is HOLY.

Free to be me Retreat

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Scholarships to the October Retreat!

You don't want to miss it! We have yet another scholarship give away contest coming on Monday!! Check back and see who is sponsoring this and how YOU could be the winner of this scholarship.

We're counting down until the retreat. You are being prayed for by our amazing retreat team. Excitement is building amongst us as we anticipate what the Lord has in store for this unique weekend for all our Sisters of Faith.

Come on and join us for FuN! FeLlOwShIp! FeAsTiNg At ThE tAbLe! and FeAtHeRs! (Feathers you may ask? Just wait, you'll see!)

Lead in adds, files and scrapbooking/copier home

Hello, My day has been full.
As much as I love to come and blog, write my life out for the sake of my children and posterity ...keeping up with the estate is a love as well.

The folks gave me a bag of coupons and after I hit the lead in adds (that ended last night!) I was able to get about 65% total off of all of the bulk purchasing.
After getting in late it was left to today to tend to putting all of the bounty away.

I hit the Mother load of cereal.
The Special K was only 2.50 a large family size box after lead ins and coupons.
Some of the other cereals are not a common, but the babes were tiring of Cheerios.

I found this on a clearance these go for over $4 a jar normally.
That's 6 loaves of bread for the $1 yeast.
So that being said...

I was on the phone with a lovely call from one of my nieces by marriage...
And I sat there looking around as I conversed ...this is what I saw to do.
Now the little kitchen office is all up to date.
Everything is filled and the manuscript documents at hand in the bottom drawer.
I set up a new up to date 2009 file system top drawer and dead filed into boxes to sort later in the garage. This was a very time consuming thing to do.

I sorted all of those pesky business card and then removed all of them that were in binders, sorted them into like type.
Tomorrow they will get put into binders of like kind.
With the cook books now up on the shelves this became a copy center/
scrap booking/paper crafting/ art supply center.
It has a lot of work on it yet.
That big white binder has craft articles from the 1940's to current.
Really amazing stuff.
The green and brown files have sorted craft ideas I have saved for 25 years.
Lots of things I have made or have always wanted an excuse too :)

I have been reviewing a bit of the documentation and the pedigree of the family tonight.
On securing my life line as well..
Wow what some people chose not to believe?
Here all the dates names and history...
I was amazed at the phone call today from my niece (by marriage) she is trying to document the Native American heritage to help her husband have more funding for school. She is a really nice young woman with 2 kids one is special needs on the Autism spectrum. My nephew is pretty messed up and closed off poor man. Well par for the course. Funny how we forgive 70x70x a million and yet there comes a point in life where enough is enough. Owning my own stuff recently was really empowering. Knowing that those behaviors were often a simple unconscious act...that helps in understanding others. Life though is a list of choices and I have had enough of setting myself up to need to forgive. Time for a bit thicker a skin, a bit less toleration.

I have so enjoyed the acquisition of order today!
Inch by inch.

Hope you enjoy your many wonderful blessings.

Tackle it Tuesday

This morning the flu shot was the first errand of the day.
done and feeling alright

Get your flu shot !

Followed by the home improvement store...
moss
vermiculite
two opps cans of paint to redo My Dove/Archer's room.
The little almanac was a find too.

I posted at BEE BLISS GARDENS

I filled the dogs pool, they so love the cool of the moist grass and the soak in a cold pool.

After enjoying time last evening at the grandparents we came home with a torn bottom sheet that was perfect to help in the garden this morning. Bottom sheets have a built in "hook" of sorts to hold onto the posts.
I'll have coupons for all the lead in adds and hope to tend to that this week.
She returned a jar and gave me a zippered plastic from her new sheets. This is a good way to protect your fabrics or linens. The two fabrics there are to finish off some she had given me before.

I made good use of the bottom sheet in the garden an the top sheet this is still in nice condition will be a perfect quilt bottom.
After 15 minutes I am done for the day from being outdoors...
I just have to avoid it.

WELL
budget (done up to the stage where we get together and put it on the spread sheet)
meal prep (done it is a wonderful thing to use this elec. skillet)
sewing of the nursery are the days tasks. (to be done this evening)
Watch for a post on A Place to Create Blog