Pay it Forward Came yesterday

This is so BEAUTIFUL!
"Beadin' Grams" sent me this act of kindness.
Flowing me over with loving generosity.

Thank you:)
I really appreciate the time and the heart you invested in her.

Little Dove went to the Emergency Room

It is 1 a.m. now Wednesday, and we just returned from the emergency room.
My Sweet Dove took a bit of a turn for the worse. Without much fever she developed abdominal cramps that became severe. I took her in around 10 p.m. and I was called right into a bed for her. They set and IV and began a drip. They sent blood work to the lab. The medication for the pain and nausea was also given. She was such a trooper. It was a wonderful team of women who helped me with her. The nurse tended to the IV while her aide helped her and a psychologists helped me with Dove emotionally avoiding a panic attack. It was the best Sensory Integration Dysfunction care we have received. They were aware of the condition and the needs that it posed and it was startling .They were great! They used a book to distract and explained everything as they went. We were a well oiled team. I as the Mother was a player and a part of the whole. Great job they did.
Dove has a possibility of a condition that caused all her intestinal "good bacteria" to die off and so we need a stool sample and to take it to the Pediatrician tomorrow asap. She may of had the virus that Dash had but we are not sure. She may have a urinary tract infection and they are running a 72 hour culture and will contact me. She really perked up with the IV and the Medication that eased the nausea and pain. I have an Rx to fill for that medication in the morning.
Wow I am so wound up.
She was so brave.
God is so good to us to be able to get her the help she needed.

Please pray for Our Little Dove.

Tackle It Tuesday

Good Morning!

This is my main tackle today
...Keeping this little one hydrated and resting. She is coloring and eating some shaved ice.

before

after
Kitchen duties are light. Beloved helped in the kitchen this weekend so the morning begins with a doable load to empty and a few hand dishes.

Dash is building pipe cleaner guys. He and I went to wal-mart and got a bunch of craft items. I so miss my art studio this time of year. My kids do projects all day long. We use a lot of recycled things and cardboard from the recycle bin. Markers,crayons and such. Dash just learned about how when you color with crayon it clogs the pour of the board and marker has nothing to absorb into. It is so cool to teach Dash. He is a fun kid, always eager to have questions answered and queries addressed. At times it is tiering, but all and all it is a real joy to be here to answer him. He is water coloring, and using up the art supplies faster than I can tell him to ease up. His mind is so fast and active. He is now planning a summer party for the first day of summer 6-21-08 He said that we can tend to the activities and make a food stand . He is drawing it all out and planning, making invitations. Wow! this boy is so busy!

before

after
I need to back beloved breakfast cookies. I made the dough on Sunday. Sweet man found me asleep on the couch with Dove. I awoke as he was covering me with blankets. he is so sweet to me. I did not get the lunch packed or the breakfast cookies for him today. Holding Dove all night long I could not wake up this morning.

before

after
I got the master bedroom cleaned up. This laundry need folding and putting away and the children's room straightened up. I don't know that we will be showing the house but I need to keep ready as I can. Dove being ill I don't want to show or leave at all! I just want to take care of my kids. I feel a bit over whelmed. It is a time of waiting and a time of trusting in Gods divine provision and wisdom. Oh these days are long without our normal life and property. How challenging it is yet I stop and think about the measure of our trial. It is so minuscule in a comparison with what is happening in the lives of so many. In so many country's there are great suffering occurring. Starvation, disease and death. Hopelessness.
Yet...I have a hope. My children have health and we are housed and well with the unity of our family. It is not a terrible thing to wait. It is wondering that makes it harder.. It is in the "what's, ifs and the wondering of the whys and when" ???...

Dash made a skeleton with play dough.
He wants me to find one and print it out so he can cut it out and put it on a card board.
Now he is painting a plaster cast bee. Now he is water coloring! Now he is building Lego's, Oh wait now he is building pipe cleaner men. Opps.... now he is ....setting up the pipe cleaner men into a scenario ...Wow! counter top to counter top the men are swinging from the refrigerator. I would love a window into his imagination.

Dove is making velvet coloring boards. She love those.

I should in invest in them :)

On Saturday
I purchased new plants for the walkway.
The little yellow flower smells wonderful like tea.

I had to remove the purple pansy because the heat got them. They were there sense last November so I sure got my monies worth in them.
I replanted with some white robe, marigolds and a few others.

This is perhaps going to need to be placed in deeper shade. It gets sun in the early morning. The sun here is intense.

I found this fox tail fern for $12. and the planter was mis marked for $10. I splurged on it for myself. I can take it with me when /if ;) we sell/move. I have always wanted one.
They are so beautiful to me.

This is thyme under the flowering plant.
"If I could just find the thyme"
Now I have a lot of time little monies and all my supplies are packed up in the garage and it is not able to be dug in to . My house needs to stay very clean.
This is a very strange time of minimalist days. I have a few bead and my tools. A bit of findings so I'll play a bit. I think I can get to my novel. I think maybe I'll put some time and effort into that drawer'ed dream.
Yes a wrote a novel and then just abandoned it.
It is in the edit stages. Maybe it is what I need to be doing...
Michelle I see you smiling coyly. Funny! it is the only box I can reach! :) Ha Ha Ha...Alright I will pull it out.
But...It might turn out...I might succeed at it...I cant have that!:)

Sunday Smiles

On Monday last it was 109* here a "record high for the date"
By Thursday it had dropped and Friday morning it was In the Mid 60*'s
at our house we had a 32* (high) drop withing 12 hours! The lows were even more pronounced.

I saw Beloved off to work Friday Morning with a sick Son and a Sleeping daughter
The first day of Summer Break for the kids

Note the long sleeves. It was VERY cool for the desert in mid May.
It even snowed in the high country.

With Dash sick I could not go for a walk.
Dove was so excited at the rain I just stepped out side.
It rained .82 " Friday at my house.

It was awesome and the joy my daughter was a thrill.

Summertime!
Oh the fun of playing in the rain.
The kids slept here this weekend.
So cute!
They had story time with Daddy Man in the corner on the rocker.

The kids had it all set up with the blankets and pillow.
They did not even stay up they just went in and slept.
Of course they were worn out from our busy weekend.

This is the best!

It it just too fun?

They are so proud of "camping out"
The players of Dash's care have messed up his testing for the neurological balance testing. Now It all is going to begin again on Tuesday.
Saturday
...I went to the garden center to replace plants that lost out in the record breaking heat.
It was beautiful. I went alone and the kids missed out! There were roosters and doves it was so beautiful, even slightly cool on my arms.I got several replacement plants for the entry. I have to keep a nice curb appeal. (I am so glad for I love to plant).
Just as I was finishing Dove came out with a phone and her best friend was inviting us to a swim party. I took Dove and we stayed all day. Calling Beloved in the early evening he and Dash came to join us. It was an evening of time spent with the most wounded of people and it left us both grieving for souls and weeping over the depravity of folks. Marriage a joke and wives speaking as poorly of the husbands and the men were demising of the women we were appalled and the only reason we were there was to guard the children. The kids will most likely not see each other again. I wanted Dove to have a farewell. Even Dash asked why the adults were acting so badly. The drinking was heavy with kids in the pool. I just stood in sorrow and felt so much sadness at the wounded souls. A woman was so out of it that she was set to rest in a room. She was a walking dead man. I was so grieved and showed her compassion. She saw " as she said it an aura around me and wanted to know and understand" I told her of Gods love for her. She said..."you can see me ..." I told her yes I see that her soul is wherry and tired . She Knew that God was within me. It was perhaps just for her that I was to stay. It sure was good though when my husband was there to cover me. He was really aware of the battle over the lives in the crowd and we teamed up and prayed.
Dove came home and was weeping over the loss of her best friend. The kids saw the difference in the circle of folks we have. They did not like that circle and I am glad for the opportunity to have the kids see the other way people live.
They are very grateful for their lives and family as we are.
Sunday Morning...
I stayed home and made a salad and let Dove sleep. She cried herself to sleep and I knew she needed the rest.
I forgot to stop by the drug store Saturday and had run out of my medication, I had received a call last week telling me that the mail order would not be filled until July. So I had a 90 day Rx and I have only 30 given at a time so I called to reorder the next 30 day supply at $50 a co pay arg! I had no medication for my Saturday night dose and the store was closed.
Dad and Dash Went to church.
Beloved went to drug store and they said that the Insurance refused to fill it stating that they had mailed it. When he got home without the medication we were concerned I am not suppose to miss even one dose. I called the pharmacy. They would sell me a couple to hold me over. Daddy and Dash went down to the mail box and it was there three months at a $50 copay.
I was covered the Insurance DID mail it to me after all. It had been cool so there was no problem.
Except...I began to have the horrid side effects of withdrawal...only hours after missing a dose.
Company was on the way here for a luncheon I was serving and had just prepared.

By Sunday it was in the Mid 80*'s.

We had a nice party with a family over. The kids (see the dads ) played squirt guns and I served Squirt sodas, Pasta crab salad and strawberries. My guest brought berries and watermelon. It was so nice. Her little girl played with Willy the lab. It was so cute!

At one point Dash had a melt down.Daddy Man told me later that Dash said..."nobody wants me around not even my birth mom"...speaking of his birth mother for the first time. I just felt like crying when Beloved told me. Dash is seven now and is begining to grieve the rejection of his "birth Mom".

They played with abandon.
Last night the adverse reactions of the Medication thing began to hit hard. I had shocking all over the dome of my skull. It stung. and I just felt like I needed to duck and hide. After a neighbor gave a lecture as to how stupid it is of us to sell this estate and buy a 1970's house. I tried to just be polite and hear her out but it just seemed to give her permission to continue. It just wore me out! The wisdom of this world just sees what we are doing as foolishness. Funny I feel the same way about the mentality of "having your money (debt) " work for you.
Anyway...I was so wipped out that I missed out on a girls night out that I was so looking forward too...I gave my word I would be there and let another friend down unintentionally. Arg.

Dove is sick this fine Memorial Morning.
She has what Dash had. She is very "green".
Dash and Daddy Man left to go have an adventure.
I am tending bedpan and hydrating my sweet Dove.
The real heaves have not hit and I so hope that this is mild and gentle on her.
She has had a hard couple of days with her best friend leaving.
What a wonderful daughter I have. She is laying here resting and I within feet of her to run to her aid.
The medication is begining to equalize. Wow I have to be real careful with it. Detox must be real hard when I get off of it next year. I have watched a lot of study on the brain and the effects of the neurons and such. We are sure made wonderfully. To bad this world is so hard on our vessels.

Join us for Cafe' Chat

What is a positive tradition, or godly character trait that you learned from your extended family that you hope to pass down to your own family?

Home made corn chips

I found these corn tortillas on special for 4 for $5.
So I made up some of my famous homemade corn chips for the holiday weekend.

line your counter with paper bags then accordion fold several layers of paper towel. Made sure your toweling has no coloring in it. I use only white.

I found the oil on a lead in special and got two of them when I did.
Real Sea Salt with iodine is a nutritional source.

We love the chips when they are "burn'ies" not really burnt but extra browned. They become very nutty when they are cooked this way.
Be sure that they cool well before you put them in the tin.
I had two pans running and the cook time was less then a minute in the hot oil. Then drain, salt when you first put them on the paper toweling.

Now I made the two packages and filled the chips tin.
Normally for the reduced "Costco" priced of around $8 for the two big family bags that fill the tin loosely. I was able to make the home made chips that really fill the tin up tightly. Oh the flavor! These are so crisp and fresh. Lots of salt too.

for...One hour of my time and...

1.25 tortillas
1.25 tortillas
2.50 canola oil
0.50 sea salt
total $5.50

Aloha Friday

I had the kids take out the recycle trash from the loading up of the garage fridge.
A few minutes later Dove came in and began gathering things.
In she came with...Her robot "Sponge bot".
They then spent and hour making robots together out of the recycle trash boxes and packing/duct tapes. They were helping each other out and working together.

With summer here for most of us.
What are you doing during the day with your kids?

We had some corn and so I asked the kids if they would like to husk it. They were thrilled! They had a lot of fun doing this simple thing. They each put their own cob in the water. Dove ate hers but Dash's loose tooth spoiled it for him. The corn was wonderful. It was lunch. That they made them self. It is fun to give them opportunity to do simple things as if they were extravagant..

Very yummy!

Finding Courage Through Sharing Blog Carnival

"In the Life of a child"
Join us in this enlightening prompt.

Tell Me What You Wish Others Understood…

Having two adopted special need kids it would have been wonderful if others understood how hard it was to face those needs with courage. I remember many who minimized the needs at the very time I was dealing with accepting the challenges I had. I had to grieve the needs of the kids in their infancy and do all I could to intervene. Some folks would act as though I was making a bigger deal out of their special needs than was warranted. This was so confusing and hurtful at times. I was being the advocate they desperately needed and my advocacy was questioned and at times it felt very undermining. It was a role I had been given to educate. So as a new mother you have a role to be an advocate and to educate the population at large. It is a time of pouring out that is just draining. It was the best when someone just offered words of encouragement. Even when others supported the duties of normal motherhood (sharing a dish or helping with a chore). You would be amazed at the hours of Paper Work I have completed. Your kids sick and You get stuck doing what feels like you SAT"s. The Stress is so taxing that your exhausted. Then you get the "well meaning" :) folks who ask if..."you knew they were that sick when you choose to adopt?" because if you did (the inference is) that "it is your own fault! you brought it on yourself"...Folks are full of ignorant misjudgments. I have heard this even for the birth children born with special needs . That it is some how the "fault" of someone or something... It is human nature to do this but when you are the target of such ignorance it can compound the pain of parenting those special needs children that need everything you can give them to over come. It is a real drain to have to be an educator of the public at such a time. That is the call however of a parent who has special needs kids.
My son may have Ushers, he is hearing impaired and had to have a surgery to fix a deformity of the throat. His ear canals are deformed. He is adopted from Russia. So we deal with the ignorant insensitive medical folks too.
"was he from any where near Chernobyl?" See what I mean. I hurts! It startles and it calls on everything as a Mother to hold the roots of the oak we must be fast beside the stream of life. For me the river I draw from is one of faith in a loving God who is constantly questioned by the mis-informed who long to blame ...To blame God. God did not do this to these adorable children of mine. The sin of man kind did. But God is turning it around.
If my son goes blind, deaf it is not that God does not love him. It will be that God will turn it around and teach the ignorant Love. You see Love is what all this is about. Ignorance is just a lack of understanding about that Love.
My son stayed alive in horrid conditions for his first 10 months of his life. He was taught because of those conditions to be angry and to feel guilt for his needs. Many a time in Russia they asked if we "really wanted him?" They kept asking this because many Americans only wanted the "perfect baby". Fuey! there is no perfection except that every baby is perfectly deserving of love! My Son was on the "throw away" side of the orphanage with the babies who were clef lip or downs syndrome children. Those children were not adopted because folks all want to avoid suffering and hardship.
Little Dove was bald and had such a severe respiratory infection that she almost died before I could get her back to the states. She could not move at 8 months and was developmentally disabled in two of the three categories. I invested 22 months of all three therapy's driving 13 miles one way three times a week and working for several hours daily. This is my Daughter my child. Now at 10 years old she is doing so well. She had a severe anxiety problem due to sensory integration disorder she would just scream at night and panic because she would just free float when she laid down. I cried so hard to see that child suffer so badly. It took several years and many lessons and great education in the disciplines. She is now off all medications and is doing well. It was so hard! I have never done anything so meaningful or great in my life! I see now the fruit of that labor of so many years. I have had 1 easy year now with her. She is the joy of my life!
I wish others understood that this great sacrifice is not without reward. We love and we are love. One thing that is not often considered is the physical and emotional price we pay as parents. These hardships age us and the stress is hard on us. It is a part of the cost. If others could love us in ways that reduce extraneous stress it could go a long way in supporting our role as main care givers.
I have gained so much more than I have given and that says a lot!
NO! I do not regret this experience! It really hurts when people ask this. I hope that folks will learn that every story is a part of a grand epic. That it is the greater epic that matters. That grand epic would be forever altered if each little story each life was not lived to the top. Each life effects the epic.
Suffering instills the ability to have compassion. It is in suffering that we see Love empowered through the gain of understanding. Understanding is the beginning of knowledge. If knowledge be gained then it is given to man to walk wisely.
Wisdom=Love=God = Intimacy with God= If into-me-i-see than I can see into-you more clearly. Then I will better know how you need to be loved.

It is in the suffering of my own youth that I was empowered to be able to love my sweet children through the journey of suffering into the life that they now thrive in. Do I wish that they did not suffer, well yes in some ways sure I do. I must trust that they will gain and develop character that this world so desperately needs more of. Do not just feel sorry for those of us who are so challenged. Rejoice with us as well for we are given a great gift in this that we can offer a gift to this world that it so desperately needs, We know something few know how to offer.
That is the very thing we could sure use more of from others :)

Thankful Thursday

Thankfully I am able to stay home with my children. Yesterday I stayed beside Dash as he was a sick little fellow. . He had vomited on Tuesday afternoon. He had a hard night on Tuesday and then Wednesday he just got the trial of the year with the sick tummy "all day". He was a great little patient. Very sweet and agreeable and not grumpy. He is so sweet. I held the little fellow all day! How Thankful I am to heal his heart. You see, Dash feels inappropriate guilt to be held and loved on. His experience in the orphanage the first 10 months still effects him in little ways only parents would see. Daddy man and I are so glad to just be able to be here for him. I just held him, it was so good for him. I held his little head in my hand as we watched movies and I held the cup as he sipped Sprite to re hydrate. He just soaked it up too. His calm is marked with a grateful peace emanating from him. It was a lovely day even though he was sick. It is such an honor and a privilege to be here for him.
His Teacher called to check on him and we spoke. She touched my heart with what she said to me. She said..."that even though she will no longer be Dash's teacher that she hopes that I would honor her with calling her my friend. She said that she always has enjoyed every conversation and that she always wants to be counted as my friend. " ...How touching and humbling to be thought of so sweetly and highly.
We spoke of dash and I told her what a sweet heart he is...she said" not only is Dash sweet but he is dynamic, popular and very intelligent. " She said that "rarely if ever will you find a child who has all three things going for them." she said "he is a very special boy"!
I agree. :)
When My Beloved came home he embraced me so wonderfully kissing my neck telling me how very much he delights in me. I felt like I was floating on a cloud in his arms.
I was not able to go to Doves play last night.
However it was the play that her teacher and class and I put on for the nursing home last week. Daddy man went with her and they had their special time together. Mr Uncommon stood up for another Mother who was being attacked verbally by a woman. Hubby told the raging Mother that it was no way to behave in front of the children. I was so proud of him for defending the woman and guarding the children. He spoke up!
Dove is very proud of the chain necklace I made for her and her friend are all begging one now.


This is her tri-fold on Giant Otters. It looked very nice.

Dove is in the green. Daddy man was able to capture a audio of it. I am not sure how to impart it into the post.

This is a thankful Thursday Morning .
Our weather is now 70* It dropped 30* or more. It was 108* just two days ago!
Dash and I were rock searching and he found a perfect humming bird this morning.
Now if you know me you will appreciate the significance here. God has often spoken to me in hard times through the humble humming bird

This is sitting on Dash's pillow.
He said" it looks like it is flying in the sky for our sky is white like this, this morning"... We have clouds today with promise of rain over the next couple of days.
Dash has to miss the last day of school. Dove is off to school. I walked her down to the bus stop. She is going to watch "Pippy Long Stocking" today at school. Dash was a bit sad about the missing of the last day of school, but I must say he is really being a good sport about it. His teacher said that there is a few viruses going around and suggested he stayed home and away from the risk with his system being compromised.
This morning his lips are a little blue.
I am so glad he stayed home. He is watching Sponge Bob right now and he is softly singing. He is still weak though. Happy enough but weak. What a sweet little patient. He keeps looking up at me and sharing a song and a smile. What a gift this son is to me.
Tomorrow I will have both children home for summer school break.
My little girl is growing up so fast!
She will be in forth grade next year. She has grown up so much emotionally. I still can see the vulnerability but I think that by holding her back this year she will be in such a better standing. The maturity is now developing so I think she will be better able to keep herself safe. She has established her character and it is a strong foundation I am not afraid for her. I think that she will do well now. This is such a huge healing for her. I am so grateful it is so wonderful when we get to see our kids thrive.

She is gaining height so fast!