Free to be me Florida Christian Bloggers Retreat Part 5 time to go home

The last of the trip was a walk into my own home.

It was that morning I relized painfully that....

I did not want to come home.

Embraced in the arms of two very kind and loving women, nurtured in their prayers over me I had a real good cry. I knew what coming home would mean.

Three long weeks of weekly knee injections.

Dealing with the IEP for Dove, and with her special needs.

Those continuous sleepless nights holding her so she could rest. Those hours wonderful in intimacy as she opened her heart left both of us less than full functional in the morning.

Knowing that I would have to face those fears of getting her back into psychiatric care.

All that was required of me to tend husband, family and home.

When I told Steve later of that morning I was stunned as his reply..."I sure don't blame you for feeling that way"...

The chestnut trees left little balls of provision all over the ground.

Harder than a pecan to crack but just as tasty

 

 

As I sat in the morning sun I saw a great winged bird gliding my way on the breeze and ask him to come to me that I might see him and he turned away as I heard within my heart it is now time to wing my own way home.

I sat with the sun in my face.

Knowing that I would be made able to face all those things ahead of me.

That the strength to do so would be given me as I needed it.

Perhaps not before.

It was enough to draw my heart back to them, back to the differences in parenting methods, the moral issues that I laid down to submit my will under the authority of my husband.

The therapy tasks ahead with the EDMR and all of the other issues we left to trust.

I pulled up my inner boots and set my heart to home and left all of the luxury of sleep and sisterly care behind.

A wonderful drive was had as the four of us went to the Tallahassee airport.

Angie (Sweet Pea) drove, as my Dear Joanne (Turtle Dove ) humored us with the Zebra Butt . Lynn sat ap front and we all just really enjoyed those last few minutes with our beloved Angie.

Once to the airport the migraine began to set in only moments before security.

Well talk about security.

4 times and the alarm just kept going off on me!

It was discovered to be my head band!

Then the girls behind me...all of my luggage was searched.

Unpacked and rifeled through.

It was my bible that drove them buggy.

I had someone laugh later saying someone needed to be reading their bible that day

:)

Lynn stepped up like a mother to me and just led me through the process of getting put all back together.

It was tough for the migraine that we were all aware was beginning to set against me was not improved by being searched!

Joanne and Lynn took such good care of me to get all put back together and to get me to some beverage. They even reminded me to stop at a keyosk for some Tylenol I was so flustered.

So we sat gate side and enjoyed one another. Lynn (cloud walker walks softly) was before me hearing of how My visit to the last days of my mothers life gave way to forgive her...just then over the intercom in the background played Mommas song..."she'll be coming around the mountain when she comes." As I boarded the craft I once again took advantage of the opportunity for the wheel chair to help me when I landed.

Upon boarding I was asked by the person who sat nest to me if I would trade seats seats with another. You know there was an opening just above that other seat for my case and the girl beside me was so kind as to go get my little bag of stuff for me. I was sore embarrassed for I thought she was with the other two and spoke to her as if she were. I could not apologize or say anything for it would of just made it worse. I just did my best to pray for the situation and gain some humility and care of lesson for future reference.

So after the awkward flight she even lifted down my bags for me. The announcement came that all who had need of wheelchair to deboard last. So I sat until the plain was empty.

We had the most authoritative caring through stewardess  during the flight . This woman really cared about us every one and would have no part of blowing off the safety instructions. To the point of confronting a person with a cell phone. My thought was who this lady really cares about our lives .

Well I told her so. How I felt about the way she did her job.

She had tears in her eyes and said WE don't hear that angle on it very often.

I had to relieve myself so bad that I thought I would pop!

The wheel chair was not noted on the stewardess papers.

So I waited and while I did relieved myself in that empty planes restroom and as I was finishing up the tank was opened to be emptied and I flew with my pants up out the door in a start. Sorta funny really. I waited and eternity and the plain was already behind schedule. They confirmed that they would get me on the next flight if I missed it.

The pilot wanted to have the lift take me off and I told him that i Could make it down the steep steps It would just be a bit painful but I could do it.

He would hear no part of it.

Eventually however that is just what I did. I was right it hurt but then there was a tram to take me to the terminal through the tarmac it was so cool.

 

 

She was so sweet and just would hear no part of me trying to go it without the chair.

In Atlanta the airport is larger than any other in the US

 

Check it out this is the cock pit.

What a cool adventure.

I just kept thinking of looking at the trip as an adventure.

  

That it was .

I drove through the tarmac.

Jet engines blowing against the tarp.

 

We wheeled around the baggage trolley's.

 

My case on the back.

 

My driver to the left stopped for an elder and grown son, and a child traveling alone.

The child sat beside me.

I encouraged her and reminded her to stay with an employee at all times.

 

That is an active engine very loud!

Well we got into the terminal after driving all the length of around 6-10 gates and then into a place where we were met by a wheel chair and up an elevator.

We were together as a group.

A fellow came and pushed that chair with me in it in a real hurry all the way to the far end of that other terminal.

I gave that fellow a $20 tip for it and boy did he earn it. He got me to the transit a train under the terminal and we were at the gate as the plane was boarded a FULL flight.

I stood there against a wall waiting for the chair to come back from the longest tunnel I have ever gone down to get on a plane. By this time I was really really hurting. Without any of the synvisk left in my knee it was full on bone on bone a long weekend, flight and bumps to boot. It was a long 20 minute to sit in the chair facing backward.

Once on board the attendant was not help.

I was way back on the plane and amazingly one of the last to board there was right above my row a place just right for my suitcase. However I was so worn out and afraid to lift it over the mans head I hessitated. Then I told Him I was afraid and asked him if he would close his lap top.

He said to lift it and that he would push it up and help me.

We did it!

I had just enough of the drink left to get two pain pills in.

I was in the window seat. So the two men stepped out for me to get in.

 

The view was beautiful as we crossed the states.

It was a very nice flight.

A meal was purchased of a giro, it was so good!

I just slept and rested.

When we landed again it was asked for those who need assistance to wait.

You know that fellow on the row, actually asked me out before him.

I told him I had to await my chariot and smiled.

He lifted down the case!

I waited untill almost everyone was off and slowly got down that long isle off the plane.

A wheel chair fellow helped me to get through the terminal and into the embrace of my awaiting family.

It was sorta hard to walk so I took it slow to the car. If I had not of taken advantage of all the help I would not of been able to walk to the car. My kids would of been freaked out, but I just told them I was tired. We went on home.

The next day was school adn steve stayed home and took me for the first injection.

I could hardly get back to the car.

The nurse was not kind she did not get that I had been on a plane the day before.

Steve was kind.

Well now it is three weeks later.

Three injections in both knees

Two unexpected root canals

an IEP for dove

Appointments set to get her intervention

rearranged Dash's bedroom

Last night moved Doves bed into dashes room

h1n1 flu shots for the kids

a full week ahead including

a 80 minute dental appointment for the build up and crown

Dash has an ASU research appointment

Dove gets new bands

A trial to testify at on Thursday...

Thanksgiving only 10 days away?

I am home.

Dove slept for the first time through the night last night! 

Last night I slept 11 hours!

just this moment an officer is walking away from my door for I had to again call 911 for a very aggressive sales person would not leave and refused to to leave my door.

I am shaking!

boy that makes me mad!

Oh I am getting a security screen door!