a pup will find a den to go hide in and lick it's wounds

Good Morning'
Life is so full of opportunity. Some of them we would rather not have. There are always folks that have it worse off than we do. That is the thought that I often lean into to console myself. It is better than the alternatives of pain medications, drugs, booze or shop-aholism. It sure beats the idea of terminating the problem in a finality that leaves wake of the loved ones in our life being ruined. It is however as easily a fix to avoid the stress of living in pain.

To avoid speaking of the pains of these bodies we hold it in afraid that if we speak that we will sound like someone judged. Judged as everything other than just some soul in pain of body.

Speaking is important however, as I have recently had impressed upon me.
Last night I spoke, just saying it as it is to a safe friend. I feel lighter. My nurse confronted me that my voice has become strained with the frustrations created through the pursuit of getting the pain issues resolved. She encouraged me to speak about it. Holding in the effects, thoughts and loneliness of chronic pain is a real energy zapper right when one needs all the strength they can find.

She reminded me of the blog. How it helped to have others to speak things out too. This is the last topic. One that actually stopped my blogging. No one want to hear about the frustrations or pains of others.

My left arm is almost out of commission. An MRI will be scheduled on it now. The injections in my shoulders of three months back are fading. The injection on the left one never took because when he gave it he hit bone. It has been so many many months of pain. The injection helped my right shoulder. A Partially torn rotators cuff, well as the doc explained it the bone is crushing the tendon that goes over the top of my shoulder.

My left wrist was to be cared for but after all the work and wait to get in, three visits, a run of steroids, then two injections it is little better. The P.A. will not let me get through to the specialist. I am going to another hand specialist, starting at ground level again! At least I have the MRI on it showing the issue. Three things, a hole in the cartilage, inflammation of tendons and bone on bone on the back of my hand. That may need to be fused.
This is a cascading issue with my low back, and foot also in pain.
Sounds like whining! I am in PAIN. No whine just an exhalation of a constrained breadth. As I hold my breadth in pain.

Woke up without the searing pain, rather stiff and moderate pain, but better than it was in my shoulder.
Thanks to Steve and the kids putting the reclining chair in our bedroom. It really helped me through the night.
It has been a busy morning here. The Pharmacy called for the  order regarding the infusion, then after two intense emails from Becca's teacher she called. Spoke at length with her and settled stuff amicably. (no stress here:) ha!
So 9:30 and we are on a role.
Dove could still get honor roll with B's. So the plan for her for the rest of the year is set. Dash is set as well. They will both graduate honor roll.

Thought I would try my hand at some interest today, there are so many dishes and tasks begging attention too. Better pull up the muster and begin.
I think of you I have walked away from in all of this. It is me not you.
I think of how a pup will find a den to go hide in and lick it's wounds.
Loving you so, Donetta